update from the reader who didn’t want to go to her new company’s Christmas party by Alison Green on December 22, 2011 Remember the reader who had been invited to the office holiday party before she’d started at her new job but was afraid it would be awkward since she didn’t know anyone and didn’t really want to go? Here’s the update: I wanted to give a quick update on the Christmas Party before I started work. I am about to finish up my first week on the job and I am so glad I took the time to go. The party was much smaller than I expected, so I did end up staying longer than I really wanted to but it was worth it. I met all but one of my coworkers, which made Monday so much more comfortable. When they took me out to lunch, people followed up things they had heard me say Friday night, rather than making small talk. I also reconnected with an old acquaintance from a different section of a professional organization I was a member of in college. To top it all off, my manager included me in the gifts he gave to each team member (a $50 gift card) and wrote a personal note about how glad he was to work with me. So to anyone interested, it was a good decision. It was exhausting but worth it. You may also like:my boss was furious that I went to a work party after calling out sickour polyamorous employee wants to bring their 3 partners to the holiday partywe can only bring our spouses to the holiday party if we have kids { 16 comments }
Dawn* December 22, 2011 at 12:38 pm It sounds like it was a great decision to go. Glad it all worked out for you. :)
Ask a Manager* Post authorDecember 22, 2011 at 12:41 pm I really love this update. It mirrors my own experience with this kind of thing: I’ll often dread going to something, seriously consider not going, and then finally make myself go … and end up having a really good time and being glad that I went. But somehow knowing that’s the pattern never actually makes the decision easier the next time.
Joey* December 22, 2011 at 1:37 pm Nice to see the op took the advice even though there was some anxiety about it.
Anonymous* December 22, 2011 at 2:14 pm This is a good story! It gives meaning to the holiday season!
Beth Anne* December 22, 2011 at 3:48 pm That is great! Heck anyone can use some extra money this time of year! I can see how I’d go back and forth on something like this and probably end up going and having an okay time. Glad everyone seemed to include you and not ignore you :)
Andrea* December 22, 2011 at 3:55 pm I’m with you, Ms. Green. As much of an extrovert as I am, I always have a moment of dread before going out. It’s worse when I have people over and spend the hour before agonizing alternately that people will come or won’t come.
JT* December 22, 2011 at 3:59 pm Cool. “Exhausting but worth it” would be a great title for a book. The subtitle would be “Networking skills for introverts.”
Wendy* December 22, 2011 at 4:57 pm I have been meaning to offer this book suggestion “How to work a room, the ultimate guide to savvy socializing in person and online” by Susan RoAne. I moved to a new place several years back and realized I don’t know how to make conversation in new settings. The book was helpful. Loved this update!
Eva* December 23, 2011 at 7:32 am As one of the people who made the case for *not* going: Yay, great to hear that it went well!
Samantha* December 23, 2011 at 11:37 am YaY! And it sounds like a nice place to work since it looks like they made effort to connect with the person!
Sarah G* December 25, 2011 at 2:29 pm I love that the boss included you on the $50 gift card and wrote a personal note. As someone who’s been left out of a holiday bonus (at a previous job) because I’d been there only 9 months as opposed to an entire year, I can definitely say it makes a difference in morale! What a smart and thoughtful manager to know how important it was to include you. This bodes well for his management style.
khilde* December 27, 2011 at 2:34 pm Agreed. Sounds like you have an excellent boss and some caring, interested coworkers. I hope you are happy at this job! Wonderful update!