most popular posts of 2023

by Alison Green on December 27, 2023

Here are the posts that interested people the most in 2023, via two lists: the most viewed posts and the most commented on posts.

Most viewed posts of 2023:

10. I supervise a manager who falsified an employee write-up … but I don’t think she should be fired

9. I resent my employee for being richer and more qualified than me

8. My boss and coworkers are constantly at my house

7. My new manager is someone I slept with years ago … and he doesn’t know we have a child

6. How do I avoid “mom energy” with my younger employees?

5. A DNA test revealed the CEO is my half brother … and he’s freaking out

4. My coworkers keep asking about my assault

3. Update: HR won’t do anything about a coworker who’s angry about my weight loss

2. HR won’t do anything about a coworker who’s angry about my weight loss

1. My boss wants to be at the hospital for my coworker’s surgery, taking vacation time when your team is understaffed, and more

Most commented on posts of 2023:

(doesn’t include open threads or “ask the readers” posts, which otherwise would hold many of the top 10 places)

10. Telling a coworker “that’s none of your business,” my team is mocking a coworker’s virginity, and more

9. Interviewer scolded me for my outfit, job requires an oath of allegiance, and more

8. Space heaters and thermostat wars, coworker’s sniffling is driving me mad, and more

7. My coworker tries to drown out my music with her own, propping your foot up on your desk, and more

6. I was fired for offending coworkers, interviewing someone with a visible squishmallow collection, and more

5. Can I get my coworker to stop using awful corporate jargon?

4. Overreaching wellness meetings, rambling coworker monopolizing trainings, and more

3. Coworker wants me to lock up my dogs so he can come to parties at my house, explaining a medical accommodation, and more

2. I resent my employee for being richer and more qualified than me

1. Coworker has temper tantrums whenever there’s noise, rigid vacation policy, and more

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{ 20 comments }

{ 20 comments… read them below }

  1. BellyButton*

    #9 and the update really bothered me. The OP doesn’t seem to recognize how incredible Jane is and how much she was actually supporting and mentoring OP and OP’s husband. She sounds like a really lovely person.

    OP, I understand that when you have struggled it is easy to look at other people and be resentful of what they have that you don’t. Feeling like other people have it easier is a natural response, but please please please remember, all people have struggles, and those struggles aren’t always out in the open for everyone to see. Focus on your own struggles instead of being resentful or jealous. You can change your circumstances, especially when you have someone like Jane giving you really helpful advice and encouragement.

    1. Vio*

      Definitely. Just because a person appears to have advantages that you don’t have doesn’t mean they’re a bad person or that they owe you anything. If they lord it above you or got the advantages through shady means then that’s different, but most of the time it’s just happenstance. It’s also worth remembering that all of us are likely to be envied by somebody who believes we have advantages over them (whether or not we really do).

    1. Engineer*

      If we get an update, it’ll be at least a year. There’s a bunch of legal issues that have to be sorted out, and most people will want to wait until those are settled before updating.

    2. Bacon Pancakes*

      +100
      I completely forgot about this and would love to find out how it was handled. As Allison said, a real clusterfudge!

    3. Roland*

      I’m curious myself, but there were some very weird comments as well as many that were just cruel or rude, so I wouldn’t be surprised if OP doesn’t update.

    1. Vio*

      They’re a lot like neighbours. It doesn’t matter how great the home/job is, if the neighbours/coworkers are awful they can make the home/job awful.

  6. Minimal Pear*

    Man I remember thinking at the time that the dog letter was going to be one of the top-commented ones, especially after the LW updated to say the coworker had actively kicked at the dogs.

    1. Chauncy Gardener*

      Me too! I started out having sympathy for Paul, but by the time everything came out, not so much.

    2. Pam Poovey*

      The comments were so hard on that LW, it was ridiculous. Even before learning his previous behavior.

    2. Festively Dressed Earl*

      I’m surprised that no one has linked that post to the current court cases. It’s wild that lower level government workers have taken an oath that falls under the 14th Amendment, but the President does not.

  8. Bruce*

    I voted for “CEO half brother” as the worst of the year, but “coworker harassing about weight loss” was right up there. Love the final update where she ran into one of the bad HR people and made them squirm!

  9. VacationOP*

    I’m the OP in number 1 who was worried about taking too much time off. I ended up needing 6 weeks of FMLA time in the fall, and then worked 4 days weeks for the rest of the year to eat up my remaining balance of “overage” time. I’m ending the year with just under the allowable amount of carry-over hours for 2024.

    While I was out, we hired 2 more full-time staff, and the difference is night-and-day. Although, I learned literally the day I returned that I am now managing a junior person for the first time in 20 years. So it’s been a bit of a challenge there.

    Happy New Year to all!

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