how to interview a really nervous job candidate by Alison Green on January 11, 2017 A reader writes: Any tips for interviewing someone who’s really, visibly nervous and isn’t able to relax as the interview progresses? I conducted an interview like this today, and I did everything I could think of to help this person relax and be herself. I was friendly, talked about myself a little to give her a few minutes to relax, made sure my body language was as relaxed as possible while still being professional (i.e., not leaning forward aggressively or anything like that), made sure there was give-and-take in the conversation rather than peppering her with rapid-fire questions, etc. Aside from her nervousness, this person was a strong candidate and I really wanted to find out if, once she got over her jitters, she might be the person we were looking for. Sadly, I couldn’t tell — she was no more relaxed at the end of the interview than at the beginning. A colleague who interviewed this person separately had the same experience. This position involves presenting company ideas to clients, so we need someone who can project confidence. What would you do in an interview like this? I answer this question over at Inc. today, where I’m revisiting letters that have been buried in the archives here from years ago (and sometimes updating/expanding my answers to them). You can read it here. You may also like:how can I stop being so nervous in job interviews?how much does nervousness matter in job interviews, avoiding office drama, and morewhat to do when a job candidate just reads answers from a script { 72 comments }
Revolver Rani* January 11, 2017 at 12:36 pm Would this be something you can effectively probe with a reference? Someone who knows the candidate’s work might be able to say whether she’s like that all the time, or grows out of when she learns the role, and so on.
Lemon Zinger* January 11, 2017 at 1:02 pm I feel like Alison has mentioned this before. Yeah, I would think asking references about a potential employee’s confidence is probably a good idea if you’re concerned about that.
Kit* January 11, 2017 at 4:53 pm One of my recent hires was extremely nervous and when I asked his references about it they said he was a little shy and not the most socially confident, but had a quiet assurance in completing tasks. I hired him since his references were otherwise glowing and he’s been a good fit, but the job doesn’t really need a tonne of social skill if they’re otherwise kind and polite.
Ripley* January 11, 2017 at 12:40 pm A second interview – where she meets with the same person for a second time might help. It allows the candidate to “reset”, if they’re capable of such a thing, and come in fresh on a different day with someone they’ve met before in a place they’ve been before.
Not My Circus, Not My Monkeys* January 11, 2017 at 3:32 pm +1 And I would add the requirement of a short presentation that would be similar to what they would present to a client. If that goes well, introduce them to team members to see how they do with introductory interactions. Now you are testing actual skills they need for the role.
Stitch* January 11, 2017 at 4:22 pm I dunno, I do extremely well in conversational interviews and presentations once I’m in a role, but I overthink and get anxious about one-off presentations for interviews. It feels like the pressure is on and I don’t even have a good reference for what they’re expecting. I just had one today, and it went really well, but I was shaking visibly by the end of the 5 minute presentation in a way I never do on the job. (I also start talking too much/too fast when I get nervous.) The interviewer didn’t comment about it, pointed out a thing he liked about my presentation, and asked a follow up question. Tbh pretending like I’m not shaking, and asking thoughtful and/or conversational questions, is the best thing for me to get my mind off the “this is a TEST and TESTS are scary” thoughts. Don’t know if that goes the same for other anxious people.
ilikeaskamanager* January 11, 2017 at 12:47 pm It’s unfortunate, but I think you got important information. The job she is interviewing for sounds like it requires her to meet strange people–your clients– and make a quick professional connection–maybe without knowing much about them. . Her performance on the interview shows that this might be a problem for her. The position you have might not be the right fit. If however, the position is similar to one that she has done previously then I agree that references might help answer your question.
AdAgencyChick* January 11, 2017 at 12:57 pm Exactly — when I interview candidates, I don’t go out of my way to make them feel less nervous. This is not to say I behave like an ogre, but with the exception of very junior candidates, one of the things I’m evaluating them on is how well I think they’d do in front of a client. And if *I* make them nervous, a tough client is going to make them fall apart! YMMV when interviewing for non-client-facing roles, of course.
Murphy* January 11, 2017 at 1:10 pm I don’t necessarily agree. There’s potentially a lot more at stake in a job interview than in a lot of job duties, even with a tough/important client.
Mags* January 11, 2017 at 1:15 pm Yep. I am someone who gets extremely nervous during job interviews (and doctor’s appointments of all things) but I have utterly no issue with clients, in meetings, or when having discussions with the same managers after the interview. Interviews are a different beast entirely.
Marche* January 11, 2017 at 2:01 pm Before an interview or presentation I’m so nervous and anxious that I physically can’t eat, because I know it’ll just make me sick. Once I meet my interviewer or get up for the presentation, I put on my game face and I’m fine. Nervousness in one thing doesn’t mean the person is going to be the same in another scenario.
k* January 11, 2017 at 2:07 pm Agreed. It’s one thing once you have the job. I can speak all day confidently to clients about teapots because I’m the Teapots Manager at Teapots Worldwide. I do this everyday, people hired me because they trusted me to do this, this is my thing. But in an interview, you’re just another person trying to convince them that you even know what a teapot is. Being in a job interview puts you in a very different mental space that other high stress situations.
Not the Droid You Are Looking For* January 11, 2017 at 1:30 pm I find myself in a similar position AdAgencyChick. I need people who are immediately comfortable in front of a client. If one of my staff comes off as nervous, often clients view this as a lack of confidence in the project and it has bigger repercussions down the line with the client.
LQ* January 11, 2017 at 2:42 pm I agree with some of the others who have commented about how they are different. For me selling myself is a super high bar and makes me very nervous. But talking about something else is very different. Usually this comes across when someone wants lots of detail on a question or as has happened often asked something like “Oh! How can we do that?” And the conversation goes more technical/more about the tools rather than about let me tell you how awesome I am. (Basically if I can show I’m good, if I have to tell I’m nervous.) I’m improving because I think less about selling ME and more about selling the work that I’ve already done, not an exact match, but it makes me much much less nervous.
Taylor Swift* January 11, 2017 at 1:18 pm I mean, maybe, but I know that I am usually much more nervous in interviews than I am in the normal course of business when I have to meet new people. They’re not perfectly analogous.
pomme de terre* January 11, 2017 at 1:44 pm Agreed. For as goofy and artificial as the job application process can be, occasionally it DOES mirror what the actual job is like. If a candidate for a front-facing job is nervous in an interview, s/he is not a good fit for the job. I work in corporate communications and while cover letters are never Shakespeare, you need to be able to write a good one in my field.
irritable vowel* January 11, 2017 at 12:48 pm I’m a person who exhibits the physical symptoms of nervousness–shaky hands and voice, pounding heart, inability to breathe normally–even in situations where I don’t really mentally feel that nervous. For some of us, it’s just an “inappropriate physiological response” to adrenaline. So it’s worth keeping in mind that a candidate like this might feel very confident but not be able to control her body’s involuntary response to being in a high-pressure situation. I now take a beta blocker about an hour before I have to give a presentation (even to colleagues that I’ve known for years), and it helps a lot with this. I’d encourage you, and others in this situation, to try to look beyond what you’re observing of the person to determine if what you perceive as nervousness is truly a lack of confidence/preparedness or just a physical stress response.
Tuckerman* January 11, 2017 at 1:32 pm Interesting. Thanks for sharing. I didn’t realize some people experience this. Can I ask, when you experience these physical symptoms of nervousness, without feeling mentally nervous, do they impact the content of your responses? Like, would you still able to answer interview questions fluidly (though maybe with frequent pauses) or would the physical symptoms impact your ability to explain a concept?
Mouse* January 11, 2017 at 1:41 pm I shake really hard in situations like these, even when I don’t actually feel that nervous. I always think my voice sounds like it’s shaking, but I’ve been told after presentations that it isn’t noticeable. Sometimes it messes with my concentration though, if I think I sound bad. I probably just look like I’m really cold!
irritable vowel* January 11, 2017 at 2:08 pm No, the physical symptoms don’t affect my ability to respond cogently at all. Getting the words out is the hard part, and I’m sure it could come across as uncertainty or lack of confidence, but it’s truly just a physical issue (not being able to breathe normally, which then makes my voice shaky and makes it difficult to get the words out.)
SimonTheGreyWarden* January 11, 2017 at 3:21 pm I’m a teacher, and I have this sometimes when I am lecturing to my class, especially if the classroom gets warm. I can feel my voice get shaky or I start to stutter. I am not nervous; I have been doing this for 7 years now and I can read a classroom pretty well, but it’s just a thing that happens sometimes.
Paper Crane* January 11, 2017 at 2:26 pm I sometimes have similar but less severe problems of a physical anxiety response when I’m not all that nervous. Through college, my heart would start pounding and my hands would shake any time I decided to speak up in class, at that time mostly because I was genuinely nervous. Even though I’m quite comfortable with speaking up or giving presentations now, every once in a while the same physical response kicks in for no particular reason. I can still give a fairly coherent response most of the time (with a slight deer-in-the-headlights look and a bit more stumbling over my words than usual), but that’s something that took some work to learn how to do.
fishy* January 11, 2017 at 4:44 pm I used to have this response too. Even if I was completely confident in what I was presenting, I would have an involuntary physical reaction (body shaking, voice shaking, trouble breathing, etc.). Thankfully it gradually went away (mostly) after I got used to the frequent presentations that my job requires. The first year or so was pretty rough.
hermit crab* January 11, 2017 at 1:33 pm Oh, I get this too! I actually enjoy occasional public speaking (at least, when I am well prepared) and I think the shot of adrenaline that it triggers is kind of a fun rush. But I have to pay attention to what I’m doing with my hands, so people don’t see they are totally shaking.
MillersSpring* January 11, 2017 at 2:04 pm To me this is like crying when having a stressful conversation with your boss. It’s an involuntary physical response that I can’t control. I’m not upset, but my body is reacting to the situation. If I interviewed someone who was visibly nervous, I’d be incredibly sympathetic. But like others have commented, if being poised when meeting strangers is critical to the role, you have to be direct with the candidate about the responsibilities and their past job experience in similar roles, and you have to confirm with their references that on the job they have no issues with being poised.
irritable vowel* January 11, 2017 at 2:13 pm I agree, although I think there’s a difference between interviewing and meeting new people. Interviewing is usually much more about having all the focus on you and there’s pressure to “perform,” and I think that tends to trigger the stress response more than meeting new people, where there’s more give and take.
Sparrow* January 11, 2017 at 10:54 pm This happens to me, too, in high-pressure meetings or anywhere I’m the center of attention, even if I’m confident that I know what I’m talking about and things are going well. I’m told that the shaky hands are the only thing people generally notice, in part because I talk with my hands but mostly because every time I go for a drink, the water bottle shakes in my hand!
Murphy* January 11, 2017 at 12:49 pm Ugh, I’ve definitely been this person in interviews before. (For me, it was a combination of social anxiety/shyness, and finding job searching to be particularly depressing and anxiety inducing [much more so than the average person, because it’s obviously not fun in general.) When receiving a rejection once, the interviewer really stressed why he preferred the other candidate, and tried to reassure me “You did really well, you should be proud of what you did” etc., which just stressed to me how nervously I had come across. (Off-topic, but add to it that I knew the other candidate, knew what they were saying about him was bullshit and sure enough they offered it to him and he turned them down, so I ended up just feeling way worse.) It sounds like you did what you could. The suggestions above are good as well, but you’re not under any obligation to do that, especially if you have serious doubts about the candidate.
That Would Be a Good Band Name* January 11, 2017 at 1:01 pm I would pay good money to find out how I come across in an interview. I am a fairly anxious person, but most people seem surprised if I mention having anxiety and always tell me that I seem very self-assured.
copy run start* January 11, 2017 at 10:25 pm Some job centers offer free mock interviews. YMMV, but the good ones will prepare realistic questions for you based on the position. At worst, they should be able to tell you if you are shaking noticeably or snap your fingers after every question. If your local center stinks, you may find similar services at the library or with job-focused service agencies in town.
NJ Anon* January 11, 2017 at 1:02 pm I’ve actually hired someone like this although it was not for a client facing role. She turned out to be great but I knew she could do the job and didn’t have to worry about her interactions with others.
Jenny* January 11, 2017 at 1:02 pm I have to interview very young students in an office setting. I work on a college campus so often when I’m interviewing a student for an office job, they are incoming freshman and this is either the first office job they’ve interviewed for – or the first job at all that they’ve interviewed for. I usually start out asking them some conversational questions “Are you going to be living on campus, which dorm, what do you think your major will be . . .” and then I suggest some clubs that they might be into. But I really ease into the actual interview questions, trying to set them at ease with this conversation about college that they’re fairly used to at this point and then start talking about the skills needed for the job and their past experience.
Lemon Zinger* January 11, 2017 at 1:06 pm Oof, this reminds me of my interview for my current job! I tend to react to nervous adrenaline by becoming very cold and clinical with my language. It’s not awesome for interviews, but I think many good hiring managers are able to see through this. I’d certainly rather be more formal in an interview than be too informal!
Temperance* January 11, 2017 at 1:39 pm I’ve been that extremely nervous and strange candidate in interviews, and I KNOW it’s cost me jobs and internships. I developed a mantra. When I interview now, I remind myself that they wouldn’t call me in unless I met the qualifications, and I channel Elle Woods. I also remind myself that I should act more like a man (which, for me, means that I need to speak about my accomplishments, and not downplay my successes). I’ve tested it out once, and I had a great interview for a job that was a really terrible fit.
Emi.* January 11, 2017 at 1:46 pm “Live every day like Elle Woods after Warner said she wasn’t smart enough for law school.”
Temperance* January 11, 2017 at 2:58 pm This is pretty much how I live my life. WWEWD (what would Elle Woods do?)
Working Mom* January 11, 2017 at 1:41 pm Years ago I interviewed someone who was visibly nervous – I was nervous too because it was my first solo interview in the other seat! When I could tell the candidate was nervous, I shared that this was my first time too and we both relaxed. Maybe I shouldn’t have “shown my cards” like that – but it worked for both of us, and I ended up hiring this candidate and it’s worked out well. Most recently after I had more experience, with a visibly nervous candidate I said something along the lines of, “Hey, I’m nervous too – as much as I’m interviewing you for the role, you’re interviewing me to be your manager!” That helped relax the candidate and they got more comfortable – it helped to remind them that it wasn’t a one-way interview.
Parenthetically* January 11, 2017 at 1:55 pm I’m surprised at how many people seem to be saying that a person’s nervousness level in a JOB INTERVIEW is necessarily going to predict their nervousness level with clients, coworkers, etc., once they have the job! Those things aren’t analogous *at all* in my mind. Quotidian work tasks seem pretty categorically different in my mind from a situation in which you have one chance to present your best self in front of a person whose assessment of me has the potential to affect my life in a pretty substantial way.
Murphy* January 11, 2017 at 1:57 pm Right! And you don’t know what other circumstances are motivating them to look for a job. Maybe they’re trying to leave an awful job, maybe they really need more money, maybe they need different hours or a shorter commute. There are any number of life circumstances that enter into it, in addition to just the personal evaluation aspect of it.
MillersSpring* January 11, 2017 at 2:16 pm Well, for a lot of jobs, the responsibilities aren’t quotidian work tasks. You may be expecting the person to talk to strangers all day long and promote the company’s goods and services. I don’t want them to freeze up or freak out when they get objections, tough questions, complaints, etc. The interview isn’t a one-way street, so I expect candidates to be sizing up the hiring manager, the role, and the organization. The hiring manager is often nervous about convincing great candidates about the company and the job!
Ultraviolet* January 11, 2017 at 2:35 pm Yeah, I think it depends a lot on what the day to day responsibilities of the job actually are. Interacting with coworkers at a meeting is usually not very much like a job interview, but selling the company’s services to clients is reasonably similar. Also, I think a lot of comments on this post can be summarized as, “You can’t be certain that someone who’s nervous in a job interview will be nervous in a stressful job situation.” But the interviewer doesn’t need to be certain of that. If they know that candidates who project confidence in an interview tend to project confidence on the job, it’s fine to hire those candidates rather than taking a chance on other ones.
Parenthetically* January 11, 2017 at 2:37 pm Well, if the job involves regular talking with strangers and promotion, then those ARE the quotidian work tasks of that job. And sure, absolutely, ideally job candidates would see the interview as a chance for them to get to know their interviewers and the job, but for many candidates, the reality of the job search is that they don’t have the luxury of being choosy and are simply trying to make a good impression in a pretty high-pressure situation. In my current job, I was coming off of an almost six-month period of unemployment after a GFC-related layoff and desperately needing to find something just to make ends meet, and this job was basically my ideal work situation. I wasn’t remotely nervous about the job itself, but the interview felt incredibly important.
Baker's dozen* January 12, 2017 at 8:18 am I’m very confident meeting strangers and talking up the services my organisation offers. That’s very different from meeting strangers and talking up *myself*. That said, I’m confident in interviews now in a way I wasn’t when I was less experienced.
Temperance* January 11, 2017 at 2:59 pm I’m great at meeting new people and interacting professionally in many situations, and I even enjoy public speaking. Job interviews are SO high stakes, though, especially in this market, that they feel like a one-way street, and are a whole different ball of wax.
Gaara* January 11, 2017 at 3:09 pm All that is certainly true, but whatever the reason, it doesn’t stop me from feeling more nervous in a job interview than a client meeting!
fposte* January 11, 2017 at 2:42 pm But this isn’t happening in a vacuum, and the person who’s nervous in a job interview is likelier to be nervous in the job than candidates who aren’t.
pomme de terre* January 11, 2017 at 3:12 pm Totally agree. A hiring manager is never working with a perfect set of information, but there’s some correlation between Stressful Situation 1 (job interview) and Stressful Situation 2 (quotidian workday stressors).
Ask a Manager* Post authorJanuary 11, 2017 at 4:16 pm Yep, and ultimately interviewers have to go on what they know, not on speculation about what might be different in the future.
pomme de terre* January 11, 2017 at 3:06 pm Do you think it would be fair/helpful for an interviewer to address an interviewee’s nerves directly? Something like, “This position is front-facing, and we need someone who can project confidence in our teapot innovations. You seem pretty nervous right now. How do you handle stressful situations?” It seems awful to essentially say, “Hey, you’re doing terrible today will you be less terrible on the job Y/N.” But the interviewer can’t ignore what she’s seeing either and hope that the candidate responds differently under similar if not identical circumstances (interview vs a stressful work situation). I guess “is this person good under normal circumstances” is a Q for references, but if someone was a nervous mess in an interview I don’t know that I’d get as far as the references. Oof, written down this seems super-mean, but I’m asking in good faith. An interview isn’t perfectly analogous to a stressful work situation, particularly public-facing ones, but it’s not that far off.
Parenthetically* January 11, 2017 at 3:09 pm I actually think it’s great to point out the elephant in the room in those situations. I don’t think it needs to be said in the tone of, “You are sucking so bad right now lmk if you will suck less in future,” but something like, “Interview nerves are so real, aren’t they? Can you tell me about a time when you overcame your nerves in a work setting?”
Victoria Nonprofit (USA)* January 11, 2017 at 4:22 pm For me, the problem would be less that I’d be worried that the person would be problematically nervous at work, and more that I can’t get a sense of how the person would do in the job. If you’re too nervous to be able to speak clearly, call up stories that explicate your work history, I’m not going to be able to read enough of a read on you to bring you back for more conversation.
L* January 11, 2017 at 6:55 pm Yes, agreed. I went through a super long job search after I graduated from school, and it was very hard to relax at interviews because I needed a steady paycheck so badly. In my current role, I work with people constantly, and those day to day interactions just do not have same stakes that the interview process did.
anxious anon* January 11, 2017 at 2:19 pm Ugh. Interviews are rough. An interviewer is judging a candidate on their performance during an interview and comparing it to how they think the candidate might perform in an entirely different situation. It’s likely that the stakes are higher (or at least feel higher for them personally) in the job interview where the outcome is either (ultimately) a job offer or rejection. They’re probably not familiar with you or the environment. They’ve done their best research on the company, employees, and job description, but you can’t get a totally accurate picture until you’re in it. If given the role, the candidate would be expected to adjust quickly but likely would have more than a half hour to adapt to her new environment, role, and colleagues. In the mind of an anxious person (or anyone really??) “I can ace this interview” vs. “I can provide great customer service” are totally different. Based just on how often people typically interview vs. how many rejections you get before an offer, and how much interaction you have in a job with your clients/customers/colleagues (provided her references are positive in this area) she’s probably had less success in interviews and more success with customers/clients. It’s only logical to me that she’d be more nervous about the former. Now, if the candidate was acting strangely in other ways or if there were other negative factors, that would be different. But from what I can tell, this person is probably a lot like me. I’m typically pretty anxious in interviews, but I’m quick to adapt in a high-pressure, fast-paced, stressful environment (healthcare) with demanding colleagues/clients. I normally give some references who I’ve worked with in this type of environment and not just ones who managed me from afar and didn’t really see my work firsthand, so I’d encourage the OP to see if she can get references like that. It might also help if you have the candidate talk to someone who would be more on her level in the organization.
Susan* January 11, 2017 at 2:43 pm I was this person before. I have existing social anxiety, but I was also really anxious because I had recently moved to California to help my job search and was dealing with a lot of stress related to my financial situation that I think was seeping in. I was really frustrated about not getting jobs I was very well qualified for and also did well on onsite exams, but after a while of not getting jobs, I ended up returning to my own state and getting treatment for it, which I think made me a better candidate (I now interface with others quite frequently in my current role, and I think no one realizes I suffer form anxiety). So I guess I would say if interacting with others is important to the role, it’s important to the role, and they probably will continue to have issues without some outside help (which it’s not your job to tell them to seek that). But if they’re going to do something that isn’t customer facing, I will say I am VERY, VERY good at concentrating for long periods of time on tedious tasks, which I think is a common introvert trait, and you might want to consider that.
Too Embarrassed* January 11, 2017 at 2:44 pm I was so nervous in the last interview I had that I started sweating as much as I would on a treadmill. The interview wasn’t what made me nervous – it was that I was getting over bronchitis and had that dreaded “throat tickle” along with too much cold medicine on an empty stomach…and I knew barfing was imminent. Guess what? I did barf!!! In my hands while the attorney who was conducting g the interview led me to the ladies room. They still hired me!!
Michele* January 11, 2017 at 2:56 pm They probably liked your work ethic if you would show up when you were that sick.
Michele* January 11, 2017 at 2:55 pm We run into this fairly often when we are interviewing people straight out of grad school. In our field, grad schools can be brutal and have a “cull the herd” philosophy. People frequently give presentations, and professors and others can be real bullies when asking questions. Not all Ph.D. programs are like that, but many are. We routinely present our work here, so giving a presentation on their research is part of the interview. Some people get visibly shaken and sweaty before they start while they are waiting for everyone to come into the room, even if they were fine in the one-on-one meetings. We try making small talk and joking around, but there is only so much we can do. Sometimes I just want to tell them that it’s OK–no one is going to yell at them or belittle their work.
DoDah* January 11, 2017 at 3:37 pm We recently hired a data analyst that vibed very nervous in the interview. She’s been with us for three months. Her work is pretty solid but her nervousness presents when she’s showing/discussing reporting. It’s a problem. I keep hearing, “is she SURE–she doesn’t sound sure…”
Oblique Fed* January 11, 2017 at 5:09 pm I once interviewed a young woman for a prestigious and competitive fellowship. She was very obviously nervous; her hands and voice were visibly shaking. But she powered through it; she kept good eye contact and gave good, thoughtful answers to the interview questions. As it turned out, she had applied and not been selected in a previous year, and had gone to the careers center at her school for interview coaching in the hopes of making it in the next cohort, because she knew it was an area where she needed to grow. (Her essays, references, etc., were top-notch; it was just the interview where she’d struggled.) I wrote possibly one of the most glowing recommendations to hire that I ever have; I was tremendously impressed by her dedication and drive for self-improvement to reach her goals. Additionally, our fellowship was intended to increase the number of talented young professionals entering our field, so signs of really wanting a career in the field were a plus in a candidate. We did indeed hire her and she was a fantastic fellow. :)
Planner Lady* January 11, 2017 at 6:14 pm I actually disagree with Alison’s advice here. I have GAD, and while I am fine in many situations, job interviews are places where my fear of judgement goes into a spiral. Telling me that there’s nothing to be anxious or nervous about just stresses me out more. Rather than that, just saying something along the lines of “I can see you’re quite anxious here, its quite natural to be anxious in a job interview. You’re doing just fine.” is what I need to hear to settle a bit – I don’t need to hear immediate feedback that I’m going to get the job, I just need to hear that right now I’m not screwing everything up. As for people who would suggest that because someone is very anxious and nervous in one situation, such as a job interview, means they would be unable to cope in another situation, such as constantly meeting new people and clients, please don’t make that judgement in isolation. For example, I work with a wide variety of people, making presentations to senior executives and have done a lot of relationship building with clients and partners, but I just go to pieces in an interview. Don’t conflate nervousness in an interview situation with inability to handle stressful situations.
SC Anonibrarian* January 11, 2017 at 11:07 pm Another GAD sufferer here and thankfully interviews don’t kneecap me as badly as some other situations do, but I agree – interviewers, please keep an open mind as much as possible. Some reactions are beyond a person’s reasonable control.
Lissa* January 12, 2017 at 1:17 pm I think part of the problem here is that what puts one person at ease will absolutely not work for another, so there’s no real one-size-fits-all solution here. For me, bringing up that I’m anxious in any way shape or form (yours or Alison’s) would make it so much worse, as I’d become immediately convinced I’m horribly awkward and even worse than I project myself to be! Sometimes no matter what the interviewer does, anxiety brain will not relax — usually mine manifests more before the interview itself, and is crippling when I’m writing a resume or cover letter. 90% of the time I am fine during the actual interview, but every so often….nope! I liked the point someone made above, which is that it isn’t that an interviewer would necessarily be right to think “nervous here=nervous Everywhere” but that it makes it harder to get a read on what they really *would* be like.
Ultraviolet* January 11, 2017 at 10:38 pm Weird! I submitted a report via the link above the comment box. But here’s a link to the post when it originally ran here: https://www.askamanager.org/2013/06/how-to-interview-a-really-nervous-job-candidate.html
Ask a Manager* Post authorJanuary 11, 2017 at 11:13 pm Looks like Inc.’s site is temporarily down, but it should be back up soon.
MikeVP* January 12, 2017 at 10:50 am I am a nervous public speaker which at times has filtered out during interviews. However, I’ve learned to combat nervousness by being ultra-prepared, putting on my game face, and using body language to build confidence (superman/woman pose beforehand–seriously, try it!). I never thought I would be able to kick my stage fright in situations like that, but with the right preparation and by growing confidence in my approach, while still nervous I always come out to play. I’m a middish level professional and when I consult with colleagues or friends who are more junior, I cannot stress this enough. Preparation is key. Practice makes better. Not perfect because who’s perfect, #amirite?
SeekingBetter* January 13, 2017 at 10:43 am And this was me yesterday during my interview: sweaty palms, stuttering, and I swear to god my interviewers could literally feel my anxiety. I was prepared for the interview, but then I scared the daylights out of myself when I stepped on the gas instead of stepping on the brake while attempting to park my car at the public parking garage. Luckily, I didn’t run into anybody or anything! That really set the tone for my nervousness and extreme anxiety during the interview. Interview went okay because I practically stuttered the whole time. It was for a non public-facing role so I’m not sure what my interviewers thought though. I hope they don’t take my out-of-the-ordinary self into consideration.
Lindsey* July 10, 2018 at 10:35 pm I am the sort of person who gets nervous when I am being interviewed and my voice gets all shaky. I’ve been a receptionist and have had my own clients that I communicate with on a regular basis and I am not nervous at all. The fact that it’s an interview makes me nervous. Honestly I think the best way to help people like me is to meet up for coffee or some place in a relaxed environment for the interview. When I am being interviewed I am a completely different person in a bad way, and I can’t help it.