my job interview went great — why haven’t I heard back?

You walked out of your job interview feeling great – you clicked with your interviewer, nailed every question, ticked all their boxes. They seemed impressed and excited to work with you, and you were sure an offer was in your near future. But since then … nothing. Maybe your interviewer even assured you that you’d hear from them within a week or two, but now twice that amount of time has passed and they still haven’t made contact. What is going on?!

In a decade and a half of writing a work advice column, I’ve received more letters about this experience than probably any other. It’s incredibly common to have what seems like a truly great job interview only to never hear from the employer again – even in cases where you were promised that you would within a specific time frame.

I wrote about it today at New York Magazine, including why employers leave candidates hanging and what to do in the face of silence. You can read it here.

{ 97 comments… read them below }

  1. April*

    I’d had interviews that went well and I was later rejected. I’ve also had what I thought were not great interviews that ended up with glowing reviews and job offers. You never know

    1. Another Hiring Manager*

      You absolutely don’t. There are always factors in the background that the candidate is not privy to. No matter how good you feel coming out of an interview, the only guarantee you have a job is if you get the offer (and it isn’t rescinded later)

    2. Aggretsuko*

      Same here. My second worst interview ever got me a job offer, the job interview that I was declared “perfect” in, nothing!

      1. tina turner*

        I got a good job easily but then they didn’t assign anyone to me — I sat there and no one came near me. Very fast I realized I’d just let them pay me till they fired me, cause it was a mess.

      2. College Career Counselor*

        The petty part of me will occasionally check in on places I’ve interviewed to see how long their top pick lasted. While there are certainly people who are still in the role (my industry is known for not being a quick turnover field), it’s interesting (and sometimes amusing) to see how long–or short–some stay. I’ve seen 6-18 months in a role where people stay many years (or even a career). That makes me think that the organization doesn’t know how to hire, esp. if it’s happened 3-4x in the last decade. Or that it’s a hot mess, in which case, bullet dodged.

    3. tina turner*

      I’ve been on the “inside” knowing what they’re in for. There may be infighting & chaos. They don’t see that. The job may get re-done, too. “Editorial Asst.” could be way more, for good or ill.

    4. jasmine*

      having been on the interview side, it’s so hard to say that a candidate did well in isolation. maybe a candidate’s interview went great, but there’s someone who had better qualifications (technical expertise, domain knowledge, etc) whose interview went good enough. sometimes there’s two candidates you’d be happy to hire, but you can only choose one. there may be debate internally where some people think the interview went well while others don’t

      as a candidate, you’re competing against others you can’t see. it’s best not dwell on why you did or didn’t get an offer (even if that’s easier said than done)

    5. CR*

      Yes! I thought the interview for my current job was AWFUL. I was sure I had bombed it. But I got the job and it’s been great.

  2. Trout 'Waver*

    I’m currently on the other end of this one. We’ve interviewed and identified a candidate, but we need to hit our next internal milestone in order to complete the hire. And it’s been two months of unexpected delays. ARGH!

    We are keeping them in the loop, though.

    1. ferrina*

      I’ve been the hiring manager through unexpected delays, and my boss forbid me from contacting candidates during the process. For some reasons, she thought that the candidates would just be ready whenever we were?

      1. Poppy of Dimwood Forest*

        Legally we aren’t allowed to contact candidates. It’s frustrating for us. We know it’s frustrating for them. We are fearful that we’ve identified someone with the skills and knowledge we need, but cannot tell them we are working the process. That’s all done by HR.

        And you never know what’s going on behind the scenes. In two cases I didn’t think I had gotten a job. I first received a rejection from because the software didn’t know how to read some of my older government documents. In the other the project manager had emergency surgery.

        1. ecnaseener*

          “Legally we aren’t allowed” as in your legal counsel has told you not to, or as in there’s an actual law on the books forbidding anyone other than HR from contacting candidates in your field?

      2. Reluctant Mezzo*

        And then the company gets surprised that their best candidates have already been hired by someone else. I know, they should just wait in the freezer, right? /s

        1. The_artist_formerly_known_as_Anon-2*

          This, Mezzo. +++++ I’ve seen it happen many times, and it even happened to me twice — I didn’t get an offer from company A, and accepted company B’s offer.

          A company that is indecisive or wishy-washy in their hiring practices usually will lose a top candidate. Three reasons –

          1) Managers sometimes think their company is the cat’s , uh, rear end. But the candidate doesn’t think that way.

          2) A top candidate often is an aggressive one. He/she wants to move onward with their career, and get to the next step quickly.

          3) This is an alert to foot-dragging management teams. If you have an A+++ candidate, do you really think that person is going to run home and sit by the phone and wait for YOUR call for weeks? HELL NO. He/she probably has several irons in other fires.

          And if a place takes several months to complete a simple hiring – is it REALLY a place someone would want to work? I wouldn’t.

      3. Disappointed Australien*

        I once got a job offer that was so delayed I’d been given a pay rise in the new job I got from an interview after the one that got me the (other) job. It took me a bit of searching to even find the original job details in my piling system.

        Not that there was any chance of me accepting the job offer, I just wanted to know more about the people who were so disorganised that they wouldn’t even ring to find out whether I was still alive before offering me a job. I had fantasies about being their 874th most preferred candidate for the position so it had taken a while to make that many offers and get that many refusals.

        1. Not Another Username*

          “Their 874th” pick. This is good perspective. I had a recent interview where the employer said they would be doing second round interviews and notifying those who weren’t selected this week. I gave it until today to hope for a 2nd round interview invite, but no dice so far.

          Maybe they don’t want to cut me because I’m a 3rd or 4th pick. Maybe they can’t move the process forward because of budget or other roadblocks. This came out at the perfect time to give me a little extra hope!

    2. The_artist_formerly_known_as_Anon-2*

      Good luck with that, Trout.

      The sharpest candidates tend to NOT wait around while managers drag their feet.

  3. Dido*

    They could’ve interviewed 5 people and 3 of them could’ve interviewed well, but they could only hire 1 – it’s really that simple.

    1. Pomegranates*

      Yes, but this doesn’t account for ghosting candidates that they aren’t hiring. I have had interviewers explicitly promise me that they’ll get back to me “one way or another” within a certain time frame and then simply… don’t.

      1. Buffalo*

        I’m a big believer that there’s no reason not to let candidates know how something came out. I run a small nonprofit that gets hundreds of applications, and it takes me seconds to send an e-mail with all of my unsuccessful applicants BCCed, and maybe a couple of minutes to send an encouraging word to every candidate who’s interviewed well but who didn’t make the cut.

        I do think there’s often a lot of main-character syndrome in job applications. Particularly older relatives who are used to “Mary Tyler Moore walks into the office, demonstrates that she has spunk, and is hired on the spot” seem to think that every job interview I have is a referendum on how well I did. And, honestly, I’ve been in processes where I’m a 9 and the other candidates are 10s, and I’ve been in processes where I’m a 4 and the other candidates are 3s. There’s so much about a job search that isn’t about the candidate.

        1. Lizzo*

          I’ve been job searching for the last six months and have been airing my grievances about ghosting employers to friends. Many have responded with “oh but have some sympathy–people are receiving hundreds of applications”.

          If you don’t have some sort of automated system, this is the kind of thing BCC was meant for. Close the loop so everybody can move on.

      2. CubeFarmer*

        I’m in the middle of a hiring process. I’ve been upfront about our timeline, but there’s a whole second tier of candidates who received an acknowledgement email from me with a note that we would be interviewing “after Labor Day” and then nothing further. All things being equal, we won’t interview them, but if our first tier drops out, then we’ll start to consider them. I hate leaving them in the dark right now, but I also don’t want to completely close the door on their candidacy.

      3. Analyst*

        It kinda does- we don’t decline anyone until the hire is firmly made (ie, passed all checks) as we may go to the next candidate if there’s a problem, especially when we have more than one excellent option

      4. Vito*

        I had one do that to me in the last couple of weeks, Never heard from them, they reposted the job and I saw “Not Selected” on their website.
        It is tough being 59 and unemployed.

      5. Disappointed Australien*

        I wonder how often “someone will notify them” as in the poem “Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody”

    2. Person from the Resume*

      It’s not like school were everyone can earn a passing grade.

      It’s like the Olympics where only one person can win the gold medal. Anyone who made it to the finals is probably outstanding, but only 1 person wins gold.

      1. AnonInCanada*

        True, but at least those Olympic athletes learn after the competition whether or not they won the gold medal. Leaving job candidates out in the lurch for days/weeks/months/ever after pledging a response from the hiring committee is patently unfair to them. To which I say, Glassdoor is your friend.

      2. Bast*

        Sure, but at least have the courtesy to send a generic, “Dear Candidate, Thank you for your interest in this position. We regret to inform you that…” letter/email. It doesn’t even have to be personalized. While I admit that I tend to give up if I haven’t heard back within 2-3 weeks (excepting government positions, which I know take ages) it stinks to have an interview that you think went really well and then hear nothing, especially if you’re promised that you’ll “hear back regardless.”

        1. Grizabella the Glamour Cat*

          “…it stinks to have an interview that you think went really well and then hear nothing, especially if you’re promised that you’ll “hear back regardless.”

          Hiring managers should not make those kinds of promises unless they know FOR SURE that they’ll be able to keep them. Which, let’s be real, is almost never the case.

  4. Medium Sized Manager*

    I’ve started warning people in the interview that the hiring process never goes as smoothly as I want. Ultimately, it’s a tough spot for the runner up candidates. I don’t mind rejecting the “bad fits” early in the process and try to give them a quick answer. But if you are my second choice, I don’t want to reject you unless I know #1 has accepted the position, but THEY also need to time to review the offer and possibly counter. Or, as was the case in one of my more recent hires, the req was opened with the incorrect pay rate, so I couldn’t offer the job until they corrected it and then my #1 chose a different job. It’s so frustratingly messy

    1. Annika Hansen*

      One time our HR department sent rejections emails to all but our No.1 candidate. Our No.1 candidate got better offer. Same thing with No. 2. No. 3’s references weren’t good. So we went with No. 4. It was fun having to explain to the other candidates that we still wanted them. We were very fortunate to have that many qualified candidates. No.4 worked out very well. She was a bit more junior than we hoped to hire, but she picked up on things quickly.

      1. Medium Sized Manager*

        Ugh, I hate that!! Because realistically, all 4 are probably people who can do the job well; it’s just a matter of who can do it the best.

        1. Annika Hansen*

          Yes, we had an embarrassment of riches for this position. We usually don’t have it that good. We are a public university so our salaries aren’t great. We now emphasize with HR to not send rejects until we have an accepted offer. I don’t have a problem with the bad fits hearing earlier, but that just confused our HR. Our actual hire seemed worried that she wasn’t the first choice. I didn’t want her to feel like she’s the consolation prize. (She go over it. And a couple years later, she moved on to a better position in the university.)

  5. Alan*

    This was me. I actually turned down a higher offer because I was told that my preferred employer wanted me. And after a couple months they did come through. They said that the hiring process was just taking longer than expected. But it didn’t feel great and there was no communication other than me calling and them telling me to be patient.

    1. Reluctant Mezzo*

      Well, next time don’t turn down that higher offer. I mean, why should you have to reach a higher standard of courtesy than the company?

      1. Disappointed Australien*

        It’s about who as well as what, though. My field (software engineering) is full of ridiculously well paid jobs and many of those have caveats that look more like forests of red flags. At this company “comparatively few employees commit suicide”, at that company “some workers average less than 60 hours a week”, another “even with fewer stock options you’ll be well off if they vest”, while at others “management are less toxic after the court case”.

        So the preferred job offer might be “you’re merely in the top 10% of wage earners but it’s 40 hours a week, 8 weeks holiday+sick leave, a retirement co-contribution and brilliant health insurance”. To beat that with raw cash you’d need seven figures.

  6. Justin*

    I tried to be as responsive and quick as possible to anyone we interviewed. People seemed to appreciate it.

    But other managers at this company don’t always do that.

    It’s a shame though.

  7. Former Retail Lifer*

    I left my third interview with a company where the hiring manager told me that I’d hear from them next week FOR SURE but I never did. I found out, while interviewing with a different company, that a last-minute decision was made to contract out that position. It just so happened that I had an interview with the contractor for the exact same job! Weird stuff happens sometimes that the hiring manager never planned for!

  8. Philip*

    I was once approached to apply for a job, straight to interview, no application. I was interested and thought the interview went really well, then … nothing. Two months later another department of the same company offered me a job. I said: “Yes, except maybe I did something so heinous in this other interview that I am barred.” I was told not to worry. When the second manager went to HR to have a formal offer prepared, he was told I was already being hired by the other department.

    It turned out the manager that interviewed me the first time had gone down with appendicitis the next day. When she finally returned to work, she wanted to hire me but had a load on her plate after so long off.

  9. Jaya*

    The problem is that this year, at least, ghosting is the norm rather than the exception. When this rudeness becomes commonplace, it’s discouraging. I feel like at some point we job seekers need to figure out how to turn the tide when we have more power rather than having to decide if it’s worth following up or not.

    1. Ghosted*

      It’s been the norm for 2-3 decades at this point. The majority of companies ghost everyone they don’t hire. This is true across multitudes of industries for all sorts of jobs.

      1. How rude!*

        And it’s still not okay. It’s easier now than it’s ever been to set up a system where, at the very least, everyone who sent in an application through a company’s portal would get a notification that it was filled once they made a hire, but they don’t do this. It’s not about the people applying for the jobs, after all.

  10. It's Marie - Not Maria*

    I had a third interview where we discussed my start date, drug testing, and that I would need to make sure my passport was up to date, because they told me I would be traveling to an overseas location within a month. I took steps that day to renew my passport, with money I really didn’t have to spend at the time, having been laid off and job searching for 8 months. They were very specific I would receive the job offer within 24 hours – then I never heard from them again.

    Looking back now, I know I dodged a bullet, but at the time it was soul crushing.

  11. B*

    Seeing the process from the other side is incredibly enlightening. I’ve interviewed people for the same position on several different occasions. For whatever reason, the quality of the applicant pool can vary wildly. There are times when our third or fourth pick one time around would have been our top choice in another candidate pool, and there are people we’ve hired who, if they’d applied in a more competitive cycle, might not have even gotten an interview. It’s just such a crapshoot.

    Just another reason not to get too emotionally attached to any job before you’re hired (even then, probably, for different reasons…).

    1. essie*

      Seconding this! I’ve been in the exact same spot. One of the first positions I ever hired for, the first time around, the quality of the candidate pool was surprisingly low, and I offered the job to someone who *barely* met the qualifications. He was fine, but ended up leaving just six months later. Replacing him, the applicant pool had totally shifted. Like, seven candidates were more than qualified, gave stellar interviews, and had spot-on experience. Any of them would have done a great job. It’s just impossible to know all that from the applicant side!

    2. Poppy of Dimwood Forest*

      I’ve been on many, many interview panels and honestly it’s stressful. I want everyone to do well. I want to pick the best person. I ache for the good internal applicant that is just a step below the top pick.

      Those of us who care about our companies, jobs, co-workers, and employees want the best person. Not the best cultural fit. Not the person I like the best. But someone who can take the position and succeed and grow.

      You’re right. Candidate pools vary widely. We can advertise wide and far. We can offer a competitive salary and benefits. But we cannot make people apply.

  12. Apples and Oranges*

    What about when you haven’t heard back and you have another offer on the table? Personally as a hiring manager I’d want to know about that as it may help me accelerate the process

    1. Adam*

      Definitely tell them! Any significant change of circumstances is important to let any potential employers know, and having an offer in hand from another company is very significant. It’s also in your best interest, both because it makes you a more attractive candidate and because it can light a fire under them if they’re worried they’re in danger of losing you to another company.

    2. CubeFarmer*

      Oh, let them know! Maybe they can accelerate to a decision, but if not, don’t give a up a good offer on the off chance that you’ll get this one. And, you know, if you DO get the second one and you would prefer it, just leave. I know that some people would say that’s unprofessional, but, the company would screw you over in a heartbeat if that’s what worked better, so I wouldn’t hesitate. As everyone says, “it’s just business.”

    3. The_artist_formerly_known_as_Anon-2*

      Yeah, I’ve been a candidate in such a situation – three or four times – and I said “I am a candidate at another company… and I’d rather go with you, however. But I only have until tomorrow night to accept or reject the other place’s offer”…..

      It’s either “we can’t rush this” or “let’s see if I can get an offer out to you today.”

  13. learnedthehardway*

    I make a point of rejecting or keeping people warm on my projects, but there are times when I literally have no information to give my candidates. Eg. the hiring manager is on vacation, a major business change has happened and nobody knows what will happen next.

    It’s a very dynamic situation from the recruitment side. We are juggling a lot of different people in the process – some hiring managers are more responsive than others. We’re also (usually) juggling a lot of different roles, hiring managers, candidates, coordinating interviews (often with multiple people), etc. etc. It’s almost inevitable that things slip through the cracks.

    If I’m working on 10+ roles, each of which has 10+ active candidates, with 3-5 going forward to second interviews, and 5+ interviewers per role – that means I’m reaching out to about 300+ people to fill the roles on a weekly basis. That’s the nature of the specialized recruitment I do – mine is generally focused on active outreach. Corporate recruiters are dealing with 10s to 100s of applications per role.

    I don’t like turning off candidates until/unless I know for sure the hiring manager isn’t interested in moving forward. I’ve made that mistake before – hiring manager doesn’t respond for weeks, I turn someone off, and then the hiring manager wonders why we’re not setting up the next interview. So I defer that action until I know for sure. It’s pretty awkward to tell the candidate “I have no idea what is happening but nobody has asked me to turn you off”.

    1. ecnaseener*

      I don’t think it has to be that awkward to frame it as “I don’t have any news yet, but I didn’t want to leave you hanging since I promised to get back to you. I’ll be in touch once I have news.”

        1. ecnaseener*

          Come on, that’s rude to learnedthehardway. They admitted they feel awkward sending the message, I was trying to make a constructive suggestion. No need to accuse them of being deliberately unhelpful, or at least don’t piggyback on my message to do it.

  14. DivergentStitches*

    I think my greatest frustration is those companies who specifically say things like “We want you to apply even if you don’t meet 100% of the qualifications” or some blather about “Applicants in minority groups are less likely to apply but we encourage you to!” and then they STILL ghost you.

    I’m autistic and have applied to autism-related nonprofit and for-profit companies and have been ghosted repeatedly. Even those that say they highly encourage candidates with disabilities to apply. It’s appalling. I don’t expect an interview, of course, but at least a courtesy “thanks but no thanks” email should be the standard.

    1. How rude!*

      Especially when you know some piece of software is rejecting candidates who don’t meet 100% of some perhaps subset of qualifications.

  15. dulcinea47*

    Both of the times I’ve had stellar interviews and didn’t get the job, there was an internal candidate who did. So no matter how great I think it could be, after two weeks I assume I didn’t get it and move on.

    1. dulcinea47*

      should have added, I follow up once if at all. If they wanted me they’d get back to me, there’s zero need to push it.

  16. berto*

    If I don’t hear back within 3-5 working days I will follow up a total of 2x and then move on. Simply not worth the wasted energy. If they want you AND can actually get the hire done, they will. Otherwise I view it as a good representation of their internal dysfunction. If they can’t hire the person that they want to hire, think about what it’s going to be like to get anything else done.

    1. Bast*

      Not quite the same, but I went on an interview and was told there had been an error in the scheduling system and the person I was interviewing with wasn’t in. I was a little annoyed, but things happen. They told me to come back on Friday and gave a time. I came in, and once again, they “forgot.” I gave up. Internal dysfunction to that degree is not something I want to deal with anymore, and ignoring the red flags now will make it worse later.

      1. Bast*

        I agree that 3 days is really soon. A simple follow up email a day or so after can’t hurt thanking them for the interview and expressing your appreciation for the opportunity, but I wouldn’t press for an actual decision that early. I’d also listen to any timelines they give and respect that — “We hope to make a decision within the next two weeks” “We hope to begin the second round of interviews by the first week in October” etc while understanding that yes, we HOPE to begin the second round of interviews in October, but now HR has Covid and we need to postpone a week. Timelines are a guideline, and while following up occasionally within the time frame is fine, there is also such a thing as too much. It sucks, but I’d say once you express your interest once, leave it be. It would also help if more companies didn’t ghost, as getting a rejection letter or email at least provides some closure, but there we are.

      2. Orv*

        Where I work it could easily take a month. We can’t tell anyone anything until we make an actual offer, and that has to get HR approval.

  17. ArlynPage*

    I’m interviewing right now and have had 3 great interviews for a role that I am very well qualified for. The last interviewer (a peer of my hiring manager) didn’t know what the next step would be. I am SO tempted to check in with the internal recruiter to ask what to expect, but I don’t want to be a bother.

    On top of that, I saw that the role was just reposted yesterday on LinkedIn and am trying not to spiral–I know that sometimes the role has been pre-scheduled to recur on LinkedIn, or that there are candidate requirements before they can make an offer, but I am really dreading the idea of re-starting my job search… and I really want that job!

    1. CubeFarmer*

      I recently interviewed for a role and decided mid-way to accept a promotion at my current organization (it was the job I wanted, the outside role was just to provide a bargaining chip if necessary.) I emailed the search firm, and heard…not one thing in response.

      I thought that I was being professional, but that ghosting left a bad taste in my mouth. A five-second, ‘Thanks for letting us know, best of luck.” email response would have been appropriate.

      There was no way that I would put myself through another round of interviews for a job that I didn’t actually want, but I think next time I might wait for the search firm to reach out about an interview, and then refuse the request.
      Not

  18. Retro*

    I’ve interviewed for two different roles in the same company and got ghosted for one after 3 rounds of interviews and a promise to hear back within 2 weeks but had stellar communication (and rejection) for the other. I asked the communicative HR recruiter whether it was a fluke that I got ghosted, and they said that unfortunately it was individual HR recruiter based. They said that some recruiters are better at getting back to people than others, and I was probably unlucky. To me, it was just crazy that the response could vary so widely within the same company and same recruiting team!

  19. Media Mouse*

    I had this happen to me earlier in the year. Except it was a 6 month agonizing wait. I did the rookie thing and thought I had it in the bag and it turned out their internal candidate was the better fit. I was told “it was a hard decision – it could have gone either way”. Stings, but I’ve learned my lesson.

  20. Heffalump*

    In early 1982 I’d just been laid off from my job, and my financial situation was such that not having a paycheck was Not Good. At one point I interviewed with the owner of a smallish company. I didn’t feel that the interview went fantastic, but it went well enough. I said in so many words, “Please give me a definite yes or no once you’ve made a decision,” and she said she would. You can guess what came next—she never called me back. I was young and naïve at the time, and I was fairly annoyed—she had broken her word.

    In 1998 I interviewed for a job. In this case I’d recently gotten a 2-year technical degree, and this was a career change. The interviewer said in so many words that he was favorably impressed with me. Then, radio silence for 5 weeks, and then I got an email from the owner of the company asking me to work as an independent contractor for a few weeks to see how it went. For a number of reasons on their end, they hadn’t been able to reach out to me sooner. I took them up on the offer, and after 3 or 4 weeks they hired me as a direct employee, reporting to the guy who’d interviewed me. So, you never know.

  21. strawberry matcha*

    it’s SO frustrating but I tell myself I wouldn’t want to have worked in a place that couldn’t give me the bare minimum of keeping me in the loop and/or sending a formal rejection. this type of behavior is probably alluding to larger dysfunction in the org anyway (but it still sucks).

  22. Gotta rant*

    Ghosting is more common than not than not these days, especially from recruiters. Recruiters and hiring managers that respect a candidate’s time are getting more and more rare.

    When I was working as a contractor with no PTO, taking half a day for an interview hit me hard in the wallet. I’ve had people demand same-day interviews then vanish afterwards, scheduled my day around interviews to only have people not show up.

    I gave up guessing how I did in an interview a long time ago. I can certainly feel I answered questions well, but the interviewer might not and their tone and/or body language don’t give that away.

    1. Reluctant Mezzo*

      I guess we’re supposed to be happy we don’t have do a day’s worth of free work to ‘demonstrate our capabilities’ though there are some places who get lots of free work done that way.

  23. BigBird*

    After my entire office was shut down I got a temp job that I was hoping would become permanent. But my old boss of 17 years pushed me (hard) to apply for a job on his new team. I declined several times but finally agreed when he promised to interview on a day I had already scheduled to be off. The interviews, I thought, went great and I got an email saying “We’re going to be making you an offer for employment, hopefully today. I will call you on your cell phone when it’s available.”

    Then nothing for 3 weeks, until LinkedIn sent me a posting for the very job I had been told was being offered to me. Of course I emailed him right away and got this response: “Senior management wants at least 1 additional candidate before an offer goes out. I can’t make you an offer right now.” I could not believe it, but I replied that he had worked with me for almost 17 years. and that if that experience did not count for anything in the minds of senior management I would not be compatible with the corporate culture there. Better to find that out then, and not after I accepted a position.

    The karma? My temp job offered me a permanent position as a manager (which was a story in itself) and when I was building out my new team my ex-boss’s immediate manager applied!!! I took great pleasure in checking out his LinkedIn profile several times –I knew he would see me as someone who had viewed it–before telling the internal recruiter that he was not qualified for the position. I love karma.

    1. Sneaky Squirrel*

      I know of companies that require that every job gets posted externally even when they already know the candidate they want to hire. Usually it’s in the name of fairness and equity and it might be reported in some compliance reports somewhere. When your boss told you that senior management wanted one additional candidate, this makes me think that this is what they were doing. However, your boss handled it terribly by not being communicative and not warning you about what to expect.

  24. CommanderBanana*

    Having been on the other side, it always, always, always takes longer than than it should to make a hiring offer. I’m not excusing the craptastic behavior of companies or the lack of communication, but every time I’ve been involved in the hiring process something always came up that delayed making a decision.

  25. Judge Judy and Executioner*

    The hiring process can take a LONG time. At my last job, I was contacted by a recruiter in January, and had in-person interviews in March. I didn’t get a job offer until July. In my more recent job search, some companies took 3-4 weeks to reach out to schedule a screening or the next interview in their hiring process. The hiring market is ROUGH, and there are a lot of people out of work. If you are looking for a job, take all of Alison’s tips on resumes and interviewing, they can make a difference in the hiring process. Write a cover letter if it’s a dream job, I applied for a big stretch role, but got a call back based on my explanation of why someone of my background was interested, and how my skills were relevant.

  26. Bast*

    I realize this is very specific, but — if you are looking at government jobs, government contracting jobs, or any job that requires a certain level of clearance, it can take ages. I’ve had rejections from jobs that I applied to 8-9 months ago that I had completely forgotten about, and that’s just for a rejection letter. There’s been interviews where it takes months to get to the second round of interviews, and then they select someone and it takes another few months to get the proper security clearance. A QUICK hire would be 3-4 months. On average, it takes 6-8, but it’s occasionally stretched into 1 year. Throw in some hiring freezes or manager out on leave and you’ve just added more time to an already slow process.

  27. Truculent Sparrow*

    I needed this today…very hopeful I’ll receive an offer this week, but trying hard to keep in mind that there are plenty of reasons it will be delayed, or won’t happen at all, and most of those have nothing to do with me.

  28. House On The Rock*

    I’m one of those hiring managers who tries to connect with candidates to set them at ease as well as to sell our group to them, since I fully believe interviewing is a two way street. I think I’m as transparent as I can be about the process, how long things might take, and the fact that we frequently have multiple qualified applicants. Still, on occasion I get a “you misled me by being nice” vibe from a rejected candidate. I genuinely feel bad about that but also don’t want to come off as cold or a jerk!

  29. MG*

    As an interviewer, I try to be really warm and friendly to put people at ease. The drawback to this is that sometimes candidates come out sure that they’ve had a fantastic interview (because they felt so comfortable), when in reality, it was a horrible interview, e.g., they went totally off-topic numerous times (the position was one in which on-point spoken communication was key), totally flubbed questions, etc. I know that at least some were totally surprised not to get the job.

    Wondering how I can gently prepare candidates for a “no” when I know with certainty that I will be rejecting them?

  30. Heffalump*

    Quite a few years ago the question of employers ghosting candidates came up in the advice column of Abigail Van Buren, or maybe it was her twin Ann Landers, no matter. A few weeks later she ran a letter from an employer who had had some experience with rejected candidates becoming belligerent.

  31. Buffalo*

    Four years ago, I was offered a great job on a Friday, and told that the contract was coming on Monday. It hasn’t come yet, and the guy wouldn’t take my calls afterward, but in his defense, he didn’t say *which* Monday.

  32. Demure Coyote*

    Recently I had an interview that went really well, and got a quick follow-up email from the company with an exact timeline for when they wanted to follow up again with the handful of us who had interviewed. They stated they would get back to us all by X Date, “whether or not we were proceeding” to the second interview. They also gave a timeline for when they wanted the second interviews to be.

    I was super impressed at how organized they were, until they blew past their own deadline by over a month and I just assumed I was ghosted and moved on.

  33. Le le lemon*

    HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA this is me at the moment!
    Waiting patiently to hear back about a promising job, of which they’ve (so far) moved quickly at each step & have a real need to get this person onboard soon.
    Realistically, I wasn’t their no. 1 pick, and they offered the job to someone else late last week, and are only just getting the yes/no back now, processing that employment, and will eventually get to rejects.
    (Rip that bandaid and tell me already!
    I did make myself laugh that, whilst I may get ghosted, at least I haven’t seen the role reposted!

  34. RCB*

    I spent the last 10 years hiring and it always takes longer than expected.

    I am trying to find a job now and I am absolutely shocked and how often I will interview and be ghosted, sometimes after second and third interviews. And these are for professional positions, not basic jobs. Obviously I don’t expect to hear back from places that I apply to but don’t get an interview, but if take the time to interview, especially interview multiple times, and never hear back, it’s just absolutely mind-blowing.

  35. You Can Call Me Flower*

    I interviewed in-person, in a snowstorm, while 37 weeks pregnant. I was wearing my husband’s sneakers because my feet were so swollen. I was excited about the position, and I thought the interview went pretty well, but I never heard back. I went into labor two days later, so it took me a few weeks to follow-up and reiterate my interest and ask about next steps. They never responded. It feels so rude to me. It was not easy to get to that interview. The least they could do is send a thanks for no thanks form letter.

    1. Pizza Rat*

      I had a car accident on the way to an interview, called them before the start time and rescheduled for a couple hours later. I didn’t realize until much later that I had a concussion. I was able to answer all the questions in complete sentences, but I was ultimately ghosted.

      Still annoyed about that one.

  36. Blanked on my AAM posting name*

    I’m still sore about one interview experience some years ago. The interview went grea, and the next day they phoned to offer me the job, subject to references. One of my references would have been my then-manager (standard practice in the UK), so I gave her a quick head’s up, shared the good news with a couple of close friends, and then… nothing.

    After a couple of weeks, my manager still hadn’t heard from the company so I called to ask about their timeline and got more good news: they had been so impressed with me that they were going to change the job to a more senior role, and would send me an updated job description when they had one.

    No surprises, given the topic, but the changed job never materialised: I followed up a couple of times and they needed to agree it with the head of the local branch, then with the head of the national organisation, then they had to sort out budgets, and then they stopped responding to me.

    I had to go back to my manager and work friends to tell them the new job wasn’t happening after all, and miserably continue in a job I had come to hate. I won’t claim the experience caused the mental health breakdown I had a year or so later, but it certainly didn’t help.

  37. Formerly funderemployed*

    I shared this situation several months ago, but I feel compelled to again because it pissed me off so, so much. And I ended up getting a fuller story later on.

    I was in the running for two comparable roles at two organizations that are part of a larger federation. Org A’s HR told me I was their “top candidate” and was initially very communicative. In fact, I missed a phone call — I think I was accidentally on DND or something — and didn’t see the voicemail until days later. They followed up twice to get me in for the next round. Then, Org B started moving much more quickly despite telling me earlier that they were broadening the candidate pool before moving forward with the next round. Org B sent me an offer which freaked me out because it would require moving across the country (something I was open to but panicked when it was real). Getting an offer from Org A would’ve meant NOT upheaving my life, and there were other random reasons I liked the opportunity better. Org A stopped responding despite this very important new information and despite the fact that our last contact included calling me their “top candidate.” I tried to reach out probably too many times because of the complexities.

    Ultimately, I accepted Org B’s offer and moved across the country. Before officially accepting, I made one last-ditch effort to get in touch with Org A. They apologized and acknowledged that they were going with someone else. HR told me I was their favorite for the role, which possibly was why they told me I was their “top candidate.” Maybe I was, maybe I wasn’t. But I encourage HR folks to never use that phrasing unless it’s absolutely true.

    I understand that there are always things happening behind the scenes. I also understand that shitty hiring processes signify shitty working experiences. But the amount of anguish I and many others have gone through could’ve been avoided with more communication. There are always ways to say SOMETHING.

  38. The_artist_formerly_known_as_Anon-2*

    Yeah, I’ve been a candidate in such a situation – three or four times – and I said “I am a candidate at another company… and I’d rather go with you, however. But I only have until tomorrow night to accept or reject the other place’s offer”…..

    It’s either “we can’t rush this” or “let’s see if I can get an offer out to you today.”

  39. Jack B. Inlimbo*

    What if I am probably an 80-90% match for the role I interviewed for (based on what I learned in the application process), but I still want to work for that employer, I felt like this was an excellent cultural fit, I could do several things at this org, and I want them to know that I’d like to be considered for similar roles even if they’re not moving forward with me for this one? In this case, does it make sense to convey that?

    And how would it be perceived if I applied to another opening at this org (that I meet the qualifications for) while in limbo for the 1st role? Desperate, or passionate, or like I should’ve called first to run this by the 1st hiring manager?

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