my coworker gets upset when I say “thank you” and takes offense to routine work stuff … and my boss won’t manage her by Alison Green on March 7, 2022 A reader writes: I work in research at a university. Due to our schedules and proximity, I work most often with a peer named Sarah. Due to restaffing, we work on almost every project together. Normally Sarah and I get along just fine — we’re not grabbing lunch together, but until a few months ago, […] Read the full article →
what’s the smallest amount of power you’ve seen someone abuse? by Alison Green on March 3, 2022 Remember the person whose company accountant was nitpicking his travel expenses to the point of responding to a $12 Chipotle tab with,”Ordering extra guacamole is wasteful of member dues”? Or the weeks-long battle about the purchase of a $10 calculator? Or the admin who wouldn’t give anyone a new pen unless you turned in your old, […] Read the full article →
new hire keeps kneeling in front of me by Alison Green on February 28, 2022 A reader writes: Perhaps you can help me figure out how to best approach this strange situation at my office. I’m a senior (male) engineer in my late 30s. Recently my company hired a new college grad as a junior engineer. So far this young man seems reasonably competent on a technical level, but he […] Read the full article →
how do I get my chatty coworkers to stop saying wildly inappropriate things? by Alison Green on February 23, 2022 A reader writes: After several years working in a position I absolutely loathed, and with the help of your excellent advice on AAM, I have finally switched careers! I began working in a new field at a relatively well-known company in December, doing work that is actually interesting to me and working with a great […] Read the full article →
can I tell sick coworkers to go home? by Alison Green on February 17, 2022 A reader writes: For background: I am voluntarily working from the office (I really hate WFH) but could go home at any time — most of my coworkers are still fully remote. My company has a vaccine mandate and masks are required for anyone on-site. My question is: have office/societal norms changed enough with the […] Read the full article →
our new team lead is horrible and keeps sharing private details about us with our colleagues by Alison Green on February 15, 2022 A reader writes: My coworker, let’s call her Kate, recently got promoted to a team lead role on the team. For the sake of transparency, I was in consideration for this role as well and was the second choice if she didn’t accept. While I’m a little upset about this, I have only been at […] Read the full article →
my coworker passes me messages “from the CEO” … that I think are really from her by Alison Green on February 15, 2022 A reader writes: I’ve worked for an 80-person organization for two years in an outward-facing, sales-like role. I come with 20+ years experience. The organization has one HR employee coordinating interviews, terminations, and benefits paperwork. Most of my colleagues work in roles that require casual clothing (a branded t-shirt and jeans). My role, however, requires […] Read the full article →
my team demands aggressive positivity … and I have a medical condition that leaves me exhausted by Alison Green on February 9, 2022 A reader writes: I’m having a hard time matching my team’s energy at work. I’m not missing deadlines or turning in or sub-par work, more like a culture thing. I have a rare autoimmune disorder that leaves me drained and exhausted most days. I have a great medical team, so I have all the medical […] Read the full article →
my coworker says I bullied her … should I tell her boss she needs more of a backbone? by Alison Green on February 8, 2022 A reader writes: I recently received feedback at work and need to know how to respond. I think my boss is very wrong, but I am unsure of the best way to make her see that. I started my job last year. My role is highly technical, in a niche industry. Not a lot of […] Read the full article →
my office isn’t acknowledging my adopted baby by Alison Green on February 1, 2022 A reader writes: After a long wait, my spouse and I were finally paired with a birth family for an infant adoption and got to bring our son home! This is a complicated situation with work because I work in a position that requires coverage and the nature of the adoption process is unpredictable. Most […] Read the full article →