Ask a Manager

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…

1. Interviewer wants me to commit to the job before they make an offer

I had an interview with a company that is a direct competitor with my current employer. The two companies have similar contracts with the same agencies. There have been a few employees that have switched from one of the companies over to the other one. The prospective employer even knows all of the key people who I currently work with and their work experience.

The interview went really well and I got a good feeling of what the job duties and my possible career path were going to be. The interviewer told me that he likes everything that I had to offer. He then explained that the company policy is to ask for the person to commit to the job before getting an actual offer. He explained that in past history that interviewees would go back with offers to their current employers to see if they would match the offer and most of the times that they would. He said that he wanted to make sure I am committed to working for their company and not be able to go back to my current employer to negotiate salary. He eventually discussed salary and he stated that it didn’t matter (within reason) what my salary was going to be as long as it wasn’t negotiable with my current employer. Through the discussion, I found out they would be willing to pay me much more than I currently make. I am currently paid around industry average. Have you ever heard of a company approaching offers in this manner? Is this a red flag?

It’s absurd, because obviously you can’t commit to an offer without knowing the specifics of the salary and benefits — and it’s unreasonable for them to ask you to commit before they’ve even decided if they want to hire you. That said, I’d interpret the request as meaning “we want to know that you’re genuinely interested in this role and not simply hoping to use it as a way to get more money out of your current employer.” That’s not really something they have a right to demand either, but it’s a little more reasonable than the way he’s framing it.

I don’t think it’s necessarily a sign that they’re crazy in general; they might just handle this one thing weirdly, although I’d take it as a sign to be extra alert for other weirdness. You should never take a job without having a really good sense of the culture, management style, and how they operate generally, but it’s especially true when weirdness like this pops up.

As for what to say, I’d go with, “I obviously can’t commit to accepting an offer without seeing the details of it, but I’m very interested, and I don’t plan to use an offer to try to get a counteroffer from my employer. If I just wanted a raise from my employer, I would have already asked them for one. I’m interested in this job because ___.”

2. Contacting the person who had my job before me

Is it ok to contact the previous person who was in the position you are currently in? I never worked with or met the previous employee of my current position, but I am new to the role and wanted to reach out to them just to get a “quick and dirty” of some of the company’s special procedures to be sure I am not missing any details or steps. I am really just trying to be as efficient as possible so I can be successful in the role. I am currently finding things as they come, which creates re-work, etc.

Well, they don’t work there anymore. It’s one thing if you have one or two quick, specific questions, but most people are going to be annoyed if you contact them with something this open-ended and want them to give you a broad overview when they’re no longer being paid for their time.

3. How do I motivate a coworker?

How do I motivate a coworker? We work on projects that can be weeks or months long. We are all on the same level of pay and are expected to be capable of doing the projects from start to finish. We do have a manager but are pretty much self-managed and are expected to be motivated. Our manager is rarely needed.

How do I motivate a coworker so I am not left doing 90% of the projects? I will ask this coworker to do x,y,z (although he should know as he has been doing this job for longer than me). I shouldn’t have to ask him to do anything as he should know. The problem is if he doesn’t do his share, I am left doing most of the work because the work has to get done. It’s stressful and I find myself angry a lot of the time. The manager does know about this person and has spoken to him about doing his share of the work. It works for a few days than he is back to his regular non-productive self.

You can’t motivate a coworker. He either is or isn’t motivated. If he’s not, then you talk to your manager about how that’s affecting your work and ask how she’s like you to handle it. If your manager won’t deal with it, then the problem is more your manager than your coworker.

However, you could also start being more direct with this coworker and say something like, “You are leaving me to do the majority of work on our shared projects. How can we split this evenly and ensure that it doesn’t fall to me to assign you pieces?”

4. Wearing shorts to work

I’ve been working at a startup for the past 6 months, and now that the weather is warm, many of my colleagues are wearing shorts to work. We are all young, in our early to mid 20s, and there is no dress code. I feel kind of weird about wearing shorts to work, as I want to maintain a professional appearance. Do you think it’s okay to wear or shorts like some of my colleagues do on hot days or should I dress a cut above everyone and maintain a more professional appearance? I usually wear jeans and a button down or polo shirt.

It really depends on your workplace culture. In many offices, shorts would be wildly out-of-place. That doesn’t seem to be the case in your office, so therefore there’s nothing wrong with wearing them there if you want to. The only addendum I’d make to that is whether you notice any pattern to who does and doesn’t wear shorts. If everyone wearing them is lower-level and no one in management wears them, then you might take that as an indication that if you want to be promoted at some point, it might be useful to present yourself the way people in the roles you want to move into present themselves.

5. Coworker punched my significant other outside of work

My significant other was physically assaulted by a coworker last night following a work event. He was at work-sponsored function and after the designated hours of the event, many employees stayed at the venue at which point employee very drunkenly punched my SO multiple times (SO did not instigate nor retaliate and is fine). Is it reasonable for the employee to be disciplined for actions that occurred outside business hours? My SO thinks he cannot report this as it occurred after the event formally concluded. To me it seems like a no-brainer and I think the employee should be fired.

It’s absolutely reasonable for him to report this! The fact that it wasn’t during the work event itself or during work hours is irrelevant. His coworker punched him, multiple times. Most managers would want to know that one of their employees is punching other employees. If your significant other needs convincing, point out to him that harassment policies (and harassment laws) cover behavior outside of work as well as inside — and after all, if your boss aggressively sexually harassed you outside of work hours, he’d still probably think you should report it, right? No difference here.

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…

1. I was promised benefits with my job that I’m not getting

I was promised non-monetary perks during my job interview process like working from home days, a cell phone and the ability to bring my dog to work a handful of days a week. I negotiated this stuff in lieu of a larger salary because my quality of life is important to me. Plus I have a real cute small dog that I’ve been able to bring with me to every other job I’ve ever had. He’s used to being in an office and is quiet and very friendly and I love spending time with him.

After a few months and some hassling, I received a cell phone, but shortly after my hiring our office inexplicably became strictly a no dog office, a randomly enforced company-wide policy (we have offices across the US). I requested to work from home one day a week to help alleviate the unexpected cost of the dog walker I was now forced to hire, and was told no, that it would disrupt the “collaborative nature” of the office, despite my managers and co-workers frequently working from home. Other than just “conveniently” being forced to work from home with some frequency due to other pretend reasons (which I really don’t want to do, I hate lying), I don’t really know what other bargaining chips I have. I felt I presented a reasonable solution, though it seems there was no negotiation on this issue, despite being promised this in my interview.

My dog walker costs $240 a month (and that’s only 3x a week!), plus a lot of added stress worrying about my pooch. It’s also difficult for my to stay at the office late because I need to get home to take care of him. I guess more frustrating than that, I feel disrespected and lied to, which makes working here a lot less fun than it should be. Other than just “getting over it,” is there any way to make myself feel better about this situation?

Well, it’s not all that typical to be able to bring a dog to work; you’ve been lucky to find employers who have been willing to allow it! But if they promised it to you, it’s crappy that they backtracked on that, as well as on the other stuff. I’d address the whole situation head-on, politely but assertively

For instance: “When were negotiating my job offer, the company agreed that I could work from home X days a week (or month) and bring my dog to work several days a week. I understand that the dog policy has since changed, but these were specific things that we included as part of my offer and I’d like to figure out what we can do about the telecommuting.”

2. Is it odd for an employer to ask why you’re withdrawing from a hiring process?

Thanks to your help with my resume, I did two phone interviews for two different positions at the same company. After one of them, I was asked to come in for a three-hour in-person interview with a bunch of the team members I’d be working with in that role. After agreeing to come in the next week, I did some research about the company the night I accepted the interview.

Wow. The reviews of executive management were terrible, and there were A LOT of them. As nice as the people were that I’d dealt with so far, I didn’t want to work for a company that clearly had issues and wasn’t addressing them. So the next day, I emailed the HR person I had been working with to let her know that upon further consideration, I didn’t think the position was the right fit for me.

She replied that she was surprised, and that she wanted to know why I didn’t want to proceed. I gave her an honest, concise answer–I had read the reviews about upper management, and I was concerned about taking a position with them. She wrote back and said that she wished I’d mentioned this earlier, and that she would have preferred to address this over the phone. She said she was aware that this was a concern, and that it wasn’t the first time she’d heard it before. I was kind of taken aback–I’ve never had someone ask me why I didn’t accept a job offer or why I wasn’t interested. Is this common?

There’s nothing wrong with an employer asking why you’re withdrawing or not accepting an offer — just like there’s nothing wrong with a candidate asking an employer for feedback. But both parties can’t do it in a demanding or accusatory way and have to be willing to take no for an answer. It’s hard for me to tell if this HR person met that standard or not — I could read this either way, but certainly if she was rude or demanding, she was out of line.

3. Haven’t heard from employer since accepting a job offer

I signed and returned a job offer to a company on Friday. The HR advisor acknowledged its receipt. Everything including salary and start date has been set. I start on July 2. I gave my notice to my current job and the ball for my resignation is now in play…the announcement of my leaving was made, etc.

I haven’t heard from the HR advisor from the new company….what should I do? The last contact we had was Monday morning, when I asked if I could bump my start date by 2 days. She acknowledged and accepted. Just a quick email. The irrational, paranoid side of me is thinking things will fall through if I don’t keep in constant contact. What do you think? Should I wait for the HR advisor to contact me? Should I wait a week and contact her if I don’t hear from her?

Sounds like you’re all set. Being in constant contact afterwards isn’t typical. I’d just email the hiring manager a few days before your start date to confirm and say you’re excited about starting on the 2nd!

4. Can I refuse to train my replacement?

Can I be fired for insubordination for refusing to train my replacement?

Yes.

5. Don’t do this

Just opened an application – this was what I found on the page where the resumé is supposed to be uploaded:

“This seems weird but instead of the resume, I’m gonna include a link to my LinkedIn account as it pretty much acts as my resume.
https://www.linkedin.com/profile/xxxxxxxxx
I tried applying via linked in but was receiving errors.

Thanks,
Candidate Name”

Aiyee.

Yeah, this is not a good idea.

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…

1. Is it a red flag if an employer offers a job interview right away?

I recently offered a part-time employee a promotion (still a part-time position, but with more work, more hours, and of course higher pay), which I was expecting him to accept. But he has several projects going on right now and declined in order to keep his schedule as open as possible, which I completely understand (and he will not be penalized for it in any way).

But that’s left me in a bit of a lurch – I need a shift manager sooner rather than later. Two of my current manager-level employees are moving on in early August, and it takes while to get a new employee trained as a manager. I posted a job listing earlier this week and already have a handful of good candidates that I would like to invite for an interview. But how long should I wait? I know many job searchers expect it to be 3-4 weeks weeks before they hear anything. Would it be strange to get an interview invitation in 3-4 days? Would I be sending up any red flags, when all I want to do is get this done quickly? Or is it just a breath of fresh air for applicants?

Breath of fresh air. If they’re truly strong candidates (and not just the best you have so far), go ahead and invite them to interview; there’s no need to impose artificial waiting times. But do make sure they’re truly strong candidates; often the strongest candidates don’t apply instantly because they’re not constantly looking and might only occasionally check job ads, and you don’t want to hire people simply because they’re the first to show up.

2. We accidentally left our new employee behind when we went to a staff lunch

We have quarterly staff lunches, but due to the size and our work we have to split the lunch into two sets. My new employee, who started a few weeks ago, was put into the second group. While the staff left, my colleague went to the bathroom and in the rush of getting taxis, etc., she was left behind. My employee is furious.

I am her direct supervisor but was not part of the planning committee. What can I do, as I don’t think this was intentional? I am also new to this organization and I feel terrible. Our manger only said, “Why didn’t she just get her own taxi to join?” I am not sure this an appropriate response and would like to tell people to just apologize to her. But everyone is taking the lead of the manager and no one has said anything to her.

While that was absolutely an oversight that shouldn’t have happened, she’s furious? That’s a bit of an overreaction. I agree that she should have just gotten a taxi herself, but even if she didn’t think to do that (or for some reason thought it wasn’t an option), fury isn’t really warranted here. I would tell her that you’re very sorry that this happened, that it was obviously not intentional, and that you assume that in the rush to get into taxis, each group assumed she was with the other. Maybe add that you’d like to take her out to lunch (or take her and rest of your team, if it’s a small one) to make up for it. And you can also make a point of showing her that she’s valued in other ways, and go out of your way to include her in group discussions and anything else that comes up. But I don’t think this requires a major to-do beyond that.

3. Talking to my boss about career development when I don’t want to stay here long-term

I am a relatively recent college graduate, and I am still figuring out my career. In the meantime, I’m ironically working in a career services-related job (which is how I came across your blog). My boss is a great manager and checks up on me pretty regularly. Often he’ll ask me how I’m liking my job, what I’d like to do more of, where I see myself going, etc. He even brings up multiple times that he hopes I won’t leave anytime soon. The problem is I don’t see myself long-term in this position. It’s a decent temporary position until I figure things out. I don’t particularly enjoy the work, which is basically an entry-level assistant position, and I’m often bored. There aren’t really ways to create new projects because the job and department are very structured (and I honestly just don’t care). And there aren’t other positions within the organizations I’m interested in.

When he asks me these questions, I’m never sure how to tactfully answer them. I know he wants me to respond with answers that show that I’m invested in this job and company, but I’m honestly not. What responses can I give him that makes these conversations and my performance evaluations constructive (without giving away that I intend to stay only for a little while longer)? I really respect my boss and want to make a good impression while I’m here. I do want to gain more higher level skills (project management, etc.), although I have no idea what that would practically look like in my position and department.

“This is a great place to work for someone who’s still thinking about long-term career goals! One thing I’d love to get more exposure to is X and Y — would there ever be opportunities for me to do a little bit of work in those areas or even just talk with people who do?”

But also — while it’s totally reasonable not to see yourself staying long-term, you probably should try to stay at least a year, if not two — for your resume’s sake, for the sake of your future reference, and for your reputation overall. (You can get away with one short-term stay, but it means that you’ll really need to stay at your next job for a good solid period, or you’ll start looking like you have a pattern of job-hopping.)

4. How can I coach my employee to interview well for a promotion?

I have an employee who has worked for my company for 10+ years in various roles. She has been in her current role for about 2.5 years and is ready to move up to the next level or stage within the career path of our department. She has previously interviewed twice for the next level role, but has not been chosen. I just started managing this employee about 4 months ago, and my impression of her that she is a solid and dependable person who is confident in her role. Much to my surprise, I just learned that she was passed over for a promotion the last two times because she didn’t interview well when asked basic questions about handling work situations and lacked confidence.

What can I do to help coach this employee so that she is seriously considered for the next level when another opening becomes available? As her manager, should I be helping guide her through what interviewers are looking for, and even going so far as to do role playing with me as the hiring manager and her as the interviewee? Are there resources or websites I could direct her to that might help her prepare and practice for an interview?

Well, this website is one! You might direct her to my (free) guide to preparing for an interview.

But more generally, it would be a really kind thing if you helped her prepare for an interview, even role playing an interview if she wants to do that. And there’s something else you can do, which might even have a bigger impact on her chances: The next time she’s applying for a promotion, speak to the hiring manager for that job and let them know how great she is. Hearing accolades from her current manager can be very persuasive.

5. Can HR tell me if I’m rehireable?

I was recently terminated from my job. Is HR allowed to tell me if I am re-hireable?

That’s up to them. There’s no law on this; employers can handle it however they want. That said, if you were fired for cause, you are probably not re-hireable there. If you were laid off (meaning that your position was eliminated), you probably are, although they might have a waiting period before they will do that.

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…

1. Employee is terrified of balloons

We are in an open plan office with 5 teams of 10-14 each, and with the World Cup we have been allowed to decorate. However, one of my direct reports has a phobia of balloons, and one of the other teams has put balloons up as part of their decorations. These balloons are over 15 meters away from my report’s desk and are hidden from her view from her desk by pillars in the centre of the floor, but as soon as she walked in at 8 am last Thursday she saw them. She approached the manager of the other team and requested they be removed, he refused. When I got in at 9, she told me she would work on another floor for today until the issue was resolved. (Work from home is not possible as she is required to log into a phone system to accept calls from our clients.) Her husband (who is at manager grade in another part of this office, while she is a caseworker) has approached the regional manager (3 grades above me) and told him that if they are not removed then she will be going off sick. They have not been removed. She has today (Tuesday) gone off sick. A second team has now put up balloons at the desk of my manager, who wants to make a case for them staying up on the basis of office morale.

Several of my other reports are now talking about the situation and saying that she’s being silly and she should face up to her fears, including one who wants us to have our own balloons, and others are making jokes about popping them near her. I keep telling them they need to be more compassionate about this coworker, reminding them that a phobia is a serious thing and that everybody has their own quirks, but I still keep hearing this talk around me. I’m just lost because nobody seems to be taking this seriously. I am a manager in the UK so I’m not looking for any legal or procedural advice’ I just want some advice on how to handle this difficult situation.

Insist on removing the balloons. Seriously. Regardless of anyone’s views on how silly this phobia might seem, the fact is that it’s a phobia for her, and balloons are not so integral to your business that it should be much of a question. You have a staff member who’s getting panicky about something that will be trivial for you to remove. Tell the other manager that you’re sorry but your employee’s ability to work trumps her team’s interest in decorating with balloons, and that you need to remove them, period.

And make it clearer to your team that you’re serious about them needing to cut the jokes and that what they’re doing is mean-spirited and not something you’re okay with on your team.

2. Employer wants job candidates to submit a photo — but not of themselves

I have found a posting for a customer service position that I am very interested in. It’s a small company that supplies a niche medical device and after doing some research on them (BBB, LinkedIn, Google), I was even more interested in the position. But as I was filling out the application, I got to this: “To apply and learn more, please submit your resume, cover letter, AND a photo or graphic (NO head shots, selfies, or pictures of family members, please) that represents why you are a good fit for this role.”

I know any posting asking for a photo of the applicant with the resume is a red flag/possibly illegal, but that doesn’t seem to be what they are asking for. But If they don’t want a photo of me, what are they looking for? Seems odd. What is your opinion? Would appreciate any feedback.

Well, even asking for head shots isn’t illegal. Creepy and weird (in the U.S.), but not illegal. And if a company asking for head shots ever faces a discrimination suit for other reasons, it won’t particularly help their case that they were doing it.

Anyway, as for what this company is looking for, who knows. I would not be a good fit for this role, clearly, because that request alone would make me not apply. So I’m not particularly helpful here, but I’m publishing your letter (a) because a commenter might have interesting thoughts for you and (b) because I hate this sort of crap and welcome the opportunity to say it.

3. Is it okay to contact a recruiter who’s late for a scheduled call?

I had a phone interview scheduled yesterday morning for 8 am. I parked at the Starbucks by my office to do the phone interview in my car, so that I wouldn’t have a problem running into coworkers and because I have terrible reception at my workplace. Also, it is close enough so that I could make it to the office around the usual time I clock in.

Almost 10 minutes had passed and I still did not hear from the recruiter, so I decided to give her a call. My phone reception is usually fine in the plaza where the Starbucks is located, but I was paranoid that maybe she had been trying to call me and for some reason the calls weren’t going through. So I decided to call her because if she was trying to contact me, I didn’t want her to think I had forgotten our appointment and that’s why I wasn’t picking up.

When she answered, I explained that I don’t get the best reception in my workplace and so I wasn’t sure if she was trying to call me for our scheduled 8 am phone interview. She said no, she had just been running a little late. I feel like I have now shot myself in the foot. I’m not sure if she thought I was being too aggressive, but honestly, I just wanted to honor our appointment time and to show that I am punctual. I feel like my intentions were in the right place, and the rest of the interview actually went well. She said she would pass my resume onto the hiring manager, so I took that as a good sign, but I haven’t heard back yet. Do you think I was being overly aggressive by taking the initiative to contact her when our scheduled time had passed? And just for future reference, should I always wait for the recruiter/hiring manager to contact me no matter how late they are for the phone interview?

No, that was fine to do. You would do that with a business colleague, right? It’s fine to do with a recruiter or hiring manager too.

4. My wife is hitchhiking to work

We live in a very small town 5 miles from my wife’s work and we rely on the very poor public transport that is available to us. The first bus gets her into work 10 minutes late, and so for the past year she has been hitching into work. This is not reliable and is extremely frustrating and potentially dangerous.

She works as a passenger assistant on a council bus that takes the disabled kids to school and back. Today her manager freaked out as she was unable to get a ride into work. He said that if it happens again, he will push gross misconduct and get her fired. The route that she works on was about to start later, but he moved her onto another early start route. Does an employer have a duty to take into consideration her circumstances? We have a ten-year-old daughter and desperately need this work. She has been learning to drive and has her driving test in 5 weeks’ time. She is suffering emotionally and physically due to the pressure and stress that this manager is putting on her. She is a dedicated and competent worker, continually being praised by parents and school.

Employers don’t have a legal obligation to make allowances for personal circumstances (aside from being required to make reasonable accommodations for disabilities, religion, and the like). And it’s not crazy that her manager is requiring that she show up to work on time, particularly given her role. However, she should certainly explain that she’s in the process of remedying the problem by getting her driver’s license, but that her test isn’t for another five weeks, and ask if she can be moved to a route with a later start time until that happens.

5. Resumes for food service and retail while you’re still in school

I’m 19, and while I technically have a job at the family business, it’s not one that I ever particularly wanted or was allowed to choose. So I’m trying to find another summer job.

As I’m 19 and my work experience is basically “high school,” “some college,” and “answering phones and filing for several summers,” I’m not sure how to apply your advice to my resume. I can’t really list accomplishments, because “did the things other didn’t want to do in the office” isn’t really one I think managers want to see. I’m also not sure how to put my school experience on it. Graduated high school with honors? Still in college? Should I put my GPA in that section?

Most of my options are going to probably be in retail or food, so I was just wondering how you would go about crafting a student resumé for that sort of thing.

Well, you probably aren’t going to need a resume for retail or food service jobs; they usually have you just fill out an application and don’t ask for a resume. But if you do want to put one together, you can absolutely include accomplishments from the types of jobs you described — “pinch-hit for office manager to help keep busy office of 20 running smoothly,” “regularly garnered unsolicited praise for ___,” or whatever it is that you did well.

No need to mention high school, but do list that your’e in college. List it like this:
Education
Teapots University – 2013 – present (expected graduation May 2017)

GPA should go on there if it’s high (I usually say 3.7 or higher), but otherwise no need for it.