Ask a Manager

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…

1. I’m annoyed that my new employee started a client meeting without me

Due to unforeseen traffic, I was 15 minutes late for a meeting that was scheduled with one of my new employees and a long-term client at the client’s premises. When I arrived, I discovered my employee had entered the client’s building and announced she was there for the meeting and had started the meeting without me.

This employee had only been in my department for 4-1/2 months. She had transferred from another department and had no experience with leading meetings or the subject matter.

I was annoyed that she had not waited for me as planned (we had agreed to meet at the client’s premises) and felt she had not acted professionally as she had shown up/embarrassed me by drawing attention to the fact that it was I who was late. I have never experienced a situation where this was done by a colleague, let alone an employee, either by myself or others. Has business etiquette changed? Is it is now acceptable to embarrass your manager in the presence of a client?

No, it’s not okay to embarrass your manager in front of a client, but the issue here isn’t really that; it’s that you simply need to give her more guidance about how to handle this type of situation in the future. She probably thought that she was doing the right thing in starting the meeting on time so that the client wasn’t delayed — and some managers would have preferred the way she did it, rather than having her wait outside for you, while the client was left waiting. This kind of thing is your call to make, you need to let her know your preferences.

2. I’m leaving sometime soon, but my manager wants a formal resignation now

My husband was transferred to another city 4 years ago, and we have had a commuter marriage for that time. We are building a home in this city and it should be completed in 3-4 months. I have worked for my current employer for over 26 years and have always received “exceeds expectations” on my performance reviews. My boss and coworkers have known that I will be eventually moving for the past year and a half. Today my boss asked me if I could submit a written letter of resignation and give the approximate date I will leave. She said that by putting it in writing, it would give “us” the opportunity to interview the new candidate and train them in to my job before I leave. There are couple “red flags” that come to mind:

First, in previous situations where an employee resigned, the boss has not been able to “post” an opening for a job before the previous employee leaves. Also, since the first of the year, we have a new “productivity index” tool and employees have been sent home early and forced to use PTO when business is slow. I cannot see how the budget/productivity tool would allow for 2 people to do the same job for a certain period of time. There were layoffs at my company in November and there very well could be more. If I give formal written notice of resignation, am I not allowing the company to terminate me without any compensation?

Quite possibly. It’s also possible that your boss truly does need to formalize the fact that you’re leaving before the company will let her begin work to fill the upcoming vacancy, even if it hasn’t worked that way in the past. It’s also true that knowing that you’re leaving “sometime” this year puts her in a tough spot, because she has knowledge that she understandably wants to act on, to minimize the disruption to her department — and if you’re leaving in 3-4 months, this is the time she should start advertising if she wants you to help train the new person. That said, you’re certainly reasonable to be concerned. So why not just tell her your concerns? I’d say something like, “I’m hesitant to provide a formal resignation when I don’t currently know when I’ll be leaving, particularly since we’ve had layoffs recently. I’d be glad to talk with you informally about my plans, but those plans aren’t yet finalized enough to go beyond that. Would that work on your side?”

(But again, keep in mind that it’s not crazy for her to want to start moving forward on this transition, given your likely timeline. In a non-dysfunctional company, she should be able to do that without a formal resignation from you, but that may or may not be the case here.)

3. How should I tell my company that they can’t prevent us from discussing wages?

I started working my retail job as an hourly employee in October 2012. I, along with several other coworkers, was asked to remain with the company after the holiday season. This past October, my employer once again hired more people to help with the holidays. During this time, we found out that the new employees had higher wages than we did, even when including our annual merit raises.

Those of us who were making less decided to go to our department manager to discuss the possibility of getting a wage adjustment, as we were doing the exact same job, had more experience coming into it, and had results that were at least as good (if not better) than the newer employees who were making more. Our department manager said that she would go to the store managers, as she would ultimately need their approval for the pay increase.

It’s been four months, and our department manager just got back to us, saying that company policy prohibits us from discussing wages/salaries, and that attempting to get adjustments from the store managers on those grounds would cause problems for us. Thanks to your blog, I know that the policy goes against the National Labor Relations Act. I feel that going to my department manager first is the best idea, but how would you recommend pointing this information out?

I’d say something like, “You know, I think the company might not realize that employers aren’t allowed to restrict employees from discussing wages. It’s part of a federal law — the National Labor Relations Act. I don’t want the company to get into any trouble for that, and I suspect they just didn’t realized that there was a law on this.” Your tone should be friendly and collaborative, not adversarial — it should sound like you’re looking out for the company’s best interest, not making a legal threat.

That said, I’d be remiss not to tell you that this could potentially backfire if the company decides they don’t like people pointing out thing like, you know, laws. And if that happens, you’d need to decide how far you want to push the issue (which could eventually entail needing to talk to a lawyer or your state’s labor department, if your company handles this badly).

4. Interviewer missed our scheduled phone interview and then blamed me

What to do when a manager sets up a time for a second phone interview after 3:00 but calls at 2:00 instead? I missed the call because I was out without my phone. When I noticed I had a missed call, I called back and tried to get ahold of her, but the answering service picked up. I say that I’m sorry I missed her call, etc. She calls back at the scheduled time to tell me she called me 2:00 and she had to proceed with interviews. She said she was heading out of town and will call when she returns. What should I do at this point? Wait or send an email? Or nothing at all? Frustrated!

Well, there’s not a whole lot you can do. You could certainly send an email reiterating your interest in the position and saying that you’re eager to talk when she returns, but beyond that, it’s really in her (disorganized) court.

5. Company is rounding off our time worked in order to pay us less

The company where I work rounds off our hours to 8 hours each day by taking off the 5, 10 or 15 minutes you punched in early or stayed late or worked through lunch, even though there’s no chance you’ll make 40 hours that week. Is this legal?

Hell, no, that’s not legal. Time worked is time worked, and it must be paid. They can’t just lop off the chunks of time that they don’t want to pay you for.

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…

1. My new office invited me out for lunch, but I’m partially fasting for Lent

I started a new job around two months ago, and everything has been going really well so far. I just received an email saying that they want to have a welcome lunch for me and another employee next week, and suggesting a local restaurant I would normally like a lot. The issue is that I’m on a partial fast for Lent, and have given up a number of foods, including meat, desserts, and most beverages.

I don’t want to make a big thing of my religion in this workplace, but I also don’t want to just say, “I’m vegetarian,” and then be eating meat a week later. Should I ask if they could hold the date until after Easter? Ask for a vegetarian restaurant? Or just suck it up and order a salad?

It’s not making a big thing of your religion to simply say, “That sounds great! Since I’ve given up a number of foods for Lent, I wonder if we might wait a week?” But if you’d rather not, it would also be fine to go and order something you can eat, like a vegetarian entree or a salad. Both of those are normal enough orders that no one is likely to think anything about it.

2. Can I ask a recruiter if they’ve really been hired by the company they’re filling a job for?

Can I ask a recruiter if they have been retained by the company they are attempting to fill a job for? I don’t know if it is just my industry, but I get the feeling recruiter see job postings and reach out to anyone in my field to attempt to fill a job with the hopes of being paid a finder’s fee. It’s a waste of my time and my colleagues if they don’t stand any real chance of getting called for an interview. Am I totally wrong on this?

Some particularly sketchy recruiters do sort of thing (although definitely not the majority of them) — but there’s nothing wrong with saying, “Have you been retained by the company to work on the search?” Any reputable recruiter worth working with will have no problem answering that — so if someone balks, that probably tells you everything you need to know.

3. Am I an exception to the “don’t call to follow up” rule?

I received a “can we set up an interview” call from the founder of a small company whose position I would be filling. Unfortunately, I am 5 states away so I couldn’t come immediately. She seemed a little discouraged that I was not local since they were looking to fill her position quickly. I told her I was hoping to relocate and could do so immediately. She loved my resume and talked enthusiastically about my projects I linked on my cover letter. The phone call turned into an interview, and by the end she was telling me the daily tasks I would do and talking about scheduling a time for me to speak with her co-founder in the next two days.

She went in-depth about her co-founder, telling me about his personality and giving me a heads-up about the questions he might ask so I could prepare. She said he was away in Hawaii but she could set up a Skype interview or phone call since they wanted the position filled immediately. She even converted the time difference and asked if I would be free to talk to him at 8 p.m. in a few days. She ended the phone conversation by telling me that she called me on her cell and that I should call back if I thought of any questions.

After two days and and no response, I emailed her a thanks for talking/I did more research on your projects/ can’t wait to follow up. However, I had to email through the generic email that I applied for the job because I couldn’t find her specific email, though it is only a 5-person company. I have not heard back, but I realize that they may have found someone local or had difficulty getting in touch with the co-founder. She did say to call if I had any questions, so would it be unreasonable to check in when it has only been a week? If it is a good idea, should I mention that I would be willing pay the travel expenses for an in-person meeting if the other phone interview went well? (I didn’t say anything about paying for travel in my original cover letter like many AAM readers do.) Maybe calling is the obvious answer and I am just hyper-aware of being annoying since I have been binge reading your posts on follow ups.

I think in a case like this — where you don’t have an email address for her, haven’t heard back through the generic one, and were specifically invited to use her cell phone number — it would be fine to call her to check in. (Note: This is not carte blanche for anyone to call people to check in outside of a situation like this! This is about your specific situation.) If you’re willing to pay travel expenses to come interview in-person, I’d definitely mention that — if they weren’t planning to consider local candidates, they may not have budgeted for that, and offering to cover the cost will remove one possible obstacle from advancing in their hiring process (and is often the reality of what it takes to get hired long-distance these days).

4. My husband’s company is several months late in throwing him a retirement party

My husband retired after 30 years at the same company as of December 31. It is customary that as employees of his company retire, the company throws them a dinner at a nice restaurant for 30 or so close associates. His boss took him to lunch in December and they discussed where he would like his party. Now it is April and no word has been said about a gathering. I think this is very rude of the company and the boss that my husband’s retirement has gone unrecognized by the company. We have several close friends there who we would like to celebrate this accomplishment with. I don’t think it is my place to call his boss and inquire. Should I just throw him a belated retirement party at our expense and invite those with who we wish to celebrate? He didn’t receive any cards or well wishes because that usually happens at the party. He did leave on great terms and still goes in to help and teach on occasion, but I think he would feel akward bringing it up to them.

Yeah, if he retired in December and the party hasn’t happened by now, I would assume it’s unlikely to and proceed with whatever sort of celebration you’d like to have, rather than trying to nudge them to throw one now. For whatever it’s worth, this was probably more oversight than slight, although I imagine it doesn’t feel great either way.

5. Will this train operator ever find another job?

I read a recent news article about a train operator who admitted to dozing off before the train ran off the tracks and onto the platform. She was fired last week, and my immediate thought (probably because I’ve been reading your blog a lot lately) was, “Wow, I wonder if she is ever going to be able to find another job.”

So, do you think she will ever find another job? If she came to you, what would your advice be to her?

While a single mistake doesn’t usually preclude people from finding another job, this one is different. Major safety related mistakes this like are so serious, and can be so hard to overcome when there’s been news coverage about them, that this might be a case where her best bet is to look at other types of work. Rightly or wrongly, I think an employer would be pretty skeptical about hiring her for another train operator job — in part because if she messed up again, they’d be responsible for having hired her despite track record.

That said, the part of this that is similar to others who are fired for legitimate cause is that she’s going to need to come to terms with why it happened and take ownership for it. That’s going to lead her to the right way to talk about it with future employers (as opposed to ducking responsibility, which usually makes a firing far more concerning).

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…

1. I’m doing way more work than I signed up for

I recently took on a part-time position with a nonprofit arts group, which I am excited about, and is a great first step in my new field. I applied for the job which was listed as executive administrator, interviewed for that position, and got it. However, now that I am a few months into the job, the reality is that I have replaced both the outgoing executive director and her admin assistant. I am the only person on staff, other than artistic directors. As the only one in this role, it is assumed that I will do everything. I actually would be more than happy to take on the executive director role, but that is not my title and I am receiving less than half of the executive director’s salary.

This is also my first nonprofit job and experience in dealing with a board of directors. I am having a hard time coming up with a way to explain to them that the job I interviewed for and took is in reality a much bigger role than they let on. I do think this was a conscious choice on their part as they are trying to cut costs, and I have no one to blame but myself for accepting the salary. However, I would have angled for more if I had known I would be expected to be doing the role of the executive director.

Would it be out of line to ask the board to clarify the difference in roles between the previous executive director’s role and my dxecutive administrator role? I’d like to point out to them that I have been pushed into doing the executive director role and ask for a solution to lessen my load, so that it matches up to my job description, but not anger them. The reality is I do like the job and feel it is great experience, however it is supposed to be a part-time (15-20 hour) job and is much more than that.

How about: “I know that before I came on, there was both an executive director and an admin assistant. Now that I’ve replaced both those roles, could we talk about what you envisioned being different with the combination of these two roles into one? Are there particular responsibilities Jane was handling that no long need to be done, or other areas where we should be cutting back? It would be helpful for me to understand what you envision, and I want to make sure that we’re constructing a role that’s truly doable by one person in 15-20 hours a week.”

Also, how senior is your role? If it’s a senior role, the board is probably looking to you to figure out how to structure things (or at least should be, since a board shouldn’t be involved with day-to-day staff decisions, but rather only big-picture strategy and oversight), in which case you might come up with a proposal yourself first and then talk it over with them.

2. My manager shares too much about my coworkers

Lately I’ve found myself in situations where my managers have been over-sharing the performance problems of other employees. At my last job, my boss constantly moaned and complained about my coworkers (one in particular). While I appreciated that he was not overlooking their lack of action (because it affected my job), I would have much preferred that he address the problem with them instead of whine to me about it.

At my new job, I have a great manager who gives good feedback. We met last week to discuss my probationary period, which I passed. He told me that not everyone passes, and then as an example proceeded to tell me that he had to extend the probationary period for a coworker. I like the coworker and felt uncomfortable knowing this information. This is also concerning because if these managers complain about my coworkers to me, they are probably telling other people about performance problems that I have, too. I don’t like this kind of office gossip. When this would happen in the past, I’d give a non-committal “Mmmmm….” and then try to change the subject. In the future, is there a polite way to indicate that I don’t want to hear about my coworkers’ performance?

When you’re new on the job, that’s harder to do. But once you’ve established the relationship with your new boss more, you have more leeway to say something. You could try nicely saying something like, “Jane probably wouldn’t want people to know that” or “I’m not sure I should hear that about Jane.” That said, with a bad manager like your first boss — because complaining about an employee instead of doing something about it is a mark of a bad manager — it might be a lost cause, and there might be little you can do.

3. Asking to interview with a non-local company when I’m visiting their town

I’m wondering about how to follow up with a job I’ve already applied to. My husband and I are trying to to move to City X, and he recently found out he will be interviewing for a job there in a few weeks. I’m planning to travel to City X with my husband so we can check out the city and figure out where we might live. I’m also hoping to use this opportunity to get in touch with an employer that I applied to about a month ago.

My question is how to go about getting an interview. I applied to the job through an online system, so I don’t have the contact information for a particular person. Would it be OK for me to call the office’s main number, explain that I will be in town for a few days, and ask to speak to the hiring coordinator about potentially interviewing while I’m in town? Then I was thinking I could either ask outright about interviewing, or just ask if I could come by and speak with someone about the organization. Which approach is more likely to be successful? Do you have any advice about how to phrase my question when I call?

Email, don’t call. If you call, you’ll be putting the person on the spot in an uncomfortable way (because the answer might be no, we’re not interested in interviewing you), and also asking a question that she probably needs to think over before answering anyway. Instead, send an email, explain that you’ll be in town on those dates, and say that you’d love to meet to discuss the job if she thinks you might be a strong candidate for it and is available then. Note that this is offering them an option that they can take up if they choose to — not just asking directly to come in and speak with them, which they may or may not want to do. (And I know you said you don’t have contact info for a particular person, but you can look on their website or LinkedIn to figure out who the hiring manager likely is, or — if that fails — get contact info for HR.)

4. Possible new job might conflict with a volunteer weekend

I recently discovered your blog and have been reading it extensively during an interview process I’m currently going through. It seems to have helped, as while it’s not official, the HR manager told me that I’m one of their lead candidates and I should expect to hear from them next week. I’m very excited about this, as the job is a big step up from what I’m currently doing, and it seems like a great workplace.

There is one problem that came up in the last interview that seems ridiculous to most people but is very important to me. Their major conference takes place the first weekend in August, which is the same time as a volunteer commitment I’ve made for the past two years to something that I care a great deal about. It’s not a cause or anything that everyone understands or would be sympathetic towards, but it’s for an organization and a person who I really enjoy working with, and having to give it up would make me very unhappy. I don’t know that it’s a deal breaker in terms of accepting the job, but I would like to know going in whether I’m giving up something that’s this important to me. They just mentioned the conference in passing (I looked up when it was when I got back from the interview), and didn’t outline what the responsibilities of the job I’m interviewing for were in relation to this one specifically. Is there an appropriate way to ask what the commitment/flexibility is to this conference without coming across as not taking the job or the offer seriously?

Wait until you get an offer. At that point, as part of the negotiation, say, “I have a pre-existing volunteer commitment on (dates), which I know is the weekend of your conference. Would that pose any problems on your end? I wasn’t sure if you’d need me working then.” They might tell you it’s not an issue at all, but if it turns out that it is, then at that point you’d presumably need to choose between the job offer and the volunteer commitment. But do wait until you have an offer to raise this, and don’t accept the job without getting clarification on it (because it will be harder to negotiate if you bring it later, once you’ve already started the job).

5. Where should I be looking for jobs?

My wonderful manager has just told me that she’s leaving our group. I have been an on-site contractor at this company for over 12 years, and I’ve been on her team for 2+ years. Every year or six months, it has usually been a struggle to make sure my contract gets renewed, and my manger has been my champion, telling her bosses about everything I do for the team and reminding them of the key pieces of our work would not happen if I weren’t here, etc. I’d like to stay, but I’m not sure if it will be as enjoyable without my current manager, and I don’t know yet who my new manager will be – I don’t know if it will be someone who will work as hard to keep me here.

So I think I should start looking for a new position, but it’s been so long since I conducted a job search that I’m not sure where to look. I will get in touch with my contacts to let them know that I’m looking, and I have started looking at LinkedIn, Monster, and Dice. I have been contacted by various recruiters over the years, so I’ll get back in touch with them. Are there other resources I’m not thinking of?

Niche job boards! For instance, idealist.org for nonprofit jobs, the Public Relations Society of America for PR jobs, 37signals for programmer jobs, and so forth.

Field-specific sites like these are actually some of the best places to look for jobs in your field; they tend to be far more targeted than sites like Monster.