Ask a Manager

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…

1. My manager said she’d kick my ass after I dropped some equipment

I was helping help pack things in on a video shoot, when, I had unnoticed that I dropped a small lens cap on the street. It got pretty dirty and I apologized to my supervisor. As she was attaching it to the camera, she said in a serious tone, “Eric, if you do this again I’m going to kick your f’ing ass,” in front of a coworker. I didn’t respond to this, but I was boiling on the inside. I have been working with this person for about a year and a half, we have no problems between each other.

I couldn’t help but be flabbergasted. How, exactly, do you respond to this, if at all?

I’ve got to think this wasn’t serious — what previously normal-seeming person gets that upset over a dropped lens cap?

But if you’re really sure it wasn’t a misinterpreted attempt to be funny, then say something like, “Jane, I was pretty surprised by your response to me when I dropped the lens cap. I’m not sure how to interpret what you said.” If her response confirms it wasn’t a joke, then you can say, “Obviously I want to be careful with our equipment, and I’m not cavalier about that.” Optional add-on, if you’re comfortable with it: “A threat to ‘kick my ass’ doesn’t really seem appropriate to me.” Whether or not that last part will do any good — or whether it will do more harm than good — depends on your boss, so proceed accordingly.

2. During a long background check and approval process, I found another job I might want more

I’ve been on the hunt for a new job for about 6 months and am very ready to leave my current place ASAP. I applied to a job at a government agency back in January, was told in early February they wanted to hire me, and due to paperwork and background checks I am still waiting on an official offer I’m told is coming sometime soon, but I have no idea when. Of course, I continued looking because nothing is real until it’s in writing and you have a start date, and another opportunity seems to be a very strong possibility.

If I turned down the government agency at this point, I feel that I’ll have led them on for months and then left them in the lurch. But, I never got or accepted an offer from them with a number attached; I just said I was excited to review the offer when it came. I know their crazy bureaucratic process is not my fault, but how much should I weigh the time they invested trying to get me on board if I end up getting both these offers?

Their massively bureaucratic process is not your responsibility; it’s theirs. If it causes them enough problems, they can look into changing it, but you don’t bear any obligation to be extra accommodating to them because of it. It would be utterly unreasonable for them to expect you to forego other offers when they haven’t even made you a formal offer yet themselves — when you haven’t agreed on a salary or other details, and when they could end up not hiring at all.

Go with the job that you want the most.

3. My manager keeps giving me work outside my part-time hours

I’m currently employed part-time at a small business and receive and hourly wage. I really enjoy the work I do when I’m there, which is 2 days of the week, but my boss has been contacting me almost every day of the week either through texts, calls, or Facebook messages, to do something. While they are small tasks, they really intterupt and affect my day because she wants it to be done immediately, and I do not get compensated. She will even contact me at my other part-time job, which she knows about, to do something and ask me to do her task then and there. She gets upset if I or the other employees (all of which are part-time) don’t check Facebook or her texts, even on our days off. She will also point out mistakes everyone has made on this Facebook group she created, and scold us on it as well. When I recieved this job offer, I was not told about being contacted outside of my hours.

I’m intimidated by her, but at the same time it’s really affecting my personal life, and I’m making a lot of mistakes at work. I am searching for full-time job elsewhere but in the meantime, is there anything that I can do to help the situation?

“Could we talk about my hours? We had talked about a part-time job, two days a week, and that’s what I’d planned for, so I have other commitments the rest of the time and I’m not always able to respond quickly — or even at all — when you send me work requests outside those two days. Should we talk about changing my schedule so that I’m working additional hours, or should I just save up those items for when I’m back at work?” If she says that she just wants them done and doesn’t want to increase your hours, then say, “Because I’m part-time, I’m filling the rest of my time with other commitments. I can save up these tasks and do them when I’m back at work, or I can occasionally put in an extra hour or two outside of my normal hours, but I can’t be two days a week and available the rest of the time too.”

And if the tasks keep coming outside of your regular hours, track how much time you’re spending on them and say something like, “How would you like me to track the time spent outside of my regular hours and report it for my paycheck?” (And assuming you’re non-exempt, she’s legally required to pay you for that time. It’s not optional.)

4. Using vacation time on days that my company ends up closing early

Occasionally our company closes early the Friday before a long weekend or the day before a holiday — say 3-ish and everyone gets full pay. Bu if I have a scheduled vacation day, I am charged a full 8 hours. Does this pass the smell test?

Yes, that’s pretty normal. You’re using your vacation time in exchange for a sure thing — the certainty that you have that time off.

5. Is this hiring manager not interested or just busy?

A hiring manager at a company I see as my “dream job” contacted me last week. My resume was sent through an internal referral, and the hiring manager emailed me wanting to set up a quick call about the role. He sent me the job req and I even noticed he checked my LinkedIn profile too. I had replied within hours and informed him I was interested. However, after that email, I have yet to hear back before we can even speak. It’s been over a week and I’ve followed up with a couple emails. Is it likely they’re just not interested or just too busy to reply?

Could be either, but for your purposes, it doesn’t matter — it’s time to move on. You’ve made it clear you’re interested, It’s in their court now, and if they want to get back to you, they will.

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…

1. Should I let a company know why I don’t want to interview with them?

I’m a freelance feature film VFX artist. Staff jobs in VFX are rare, even for well-experienced artists, so when I was approached directly by a hiring manager about a staff job at a relatively young company, I was quite excited. I agreed to come in for an interview (currently planned for next week). Since agreeing to that interview, I’ve talked to several people who have worked there (small industry, news travels fast) and the stories have ranged from bad to genuinely horrible. People I trust have accused them of lying during interviews about how their contracts are set up, forcing people to work lots of unpaid overtime (which may violate the law), and shaming underperformers in company-wide emails as “motivation.”

Needless to say, I don’t want to work at a company like that. My question is, should I tell them what I’ve heard? I have no desire to turn my nose up and tell them I’m too good for them — but I wonder if they know how bad their reputation is, and how badly that will affect their ability hire good people. Their careers website focuses heavily on the cool-factor of working in film, which won’t be a big sell to anyone with more than a couple years’ experience. I’m not sure if I should just stay away and let them figure it out, or if I should mention what I’ve heard.

My question for you would be: What do you hope to gain by explaining why you’re withdrawing? There are some risks to being candid (such as burning bridges with people who you might want to work with in the future if they turn up at a different company), and probably not much gain to you. Because of that, the safer approach is to simply cancel the interview and say you’ve decided it’s not the right fit for you. That said, knowing that their practices are costing them good candidates is something that can push a company to reassess how it operates, so there IS value in being candid, as you point out. But ultimately, it’s just not your responsibility to give them feedback about their reputation at your own (possible) expense, particularly when it’s something that should be able to figure out on their own, if they cared to do it.

Read an update to this letter here.

2. How to let someone know their email font is unprofessional

What would your advice be for someone who has their email signature in Comic Sans MS (plus a smiley face), and for their coworkers? This is someone in the manager role at my organization. It just surprises me that for the year that she’s been here, no one has let her know how childish and unprofessional it may look, especially coming from a manager.

My advice for her would be to stop using it, since it’s unprofessional. My advice for her manager would be to say, “Hey Jane, you probably don’t realize that that font that you’re using in your email signature is widely used as the poster child for unprofessional fonts. I’m not normally going to nitpick your email font choices, but in this case it’s probably distracting from your otherwise professional image.” My advice for the rest of her coworkers would be to give her a similar heads-up if you have the kind of relationship that makes it likely it would go over well (receptiveness to humor would be a plus here), or to ignore it if you don’t.

3. Is it bad to explain I’m job-searching because my company is moving?

I’m looking to leave my current role for two reasons: (1) I’m looking for a more senior position with greater responsibility (not possible in current company), and (2) my company is relocating to a distant state.

When I’m asked why I’m looking to leave, should I focus solely on my desire to grow into a bigger role and leave out the relocation factor? My concern is that saying, “I’m leaving because my company is relocating” is akin to saying on a date, “I’m interested in dating you because my now-boyfriend is moving out of state and I don’t want to move with him.” It’s not really expressing an interest in the new job, but rather, something wrong with the previous one.

I’m also concerned that the relocating factor might mar the primary reason I’m looking – i.e., make it look like that the “looking for greater responsibility” reason is just a pretext and the real reason is “I need to find a job in this state.” What do you think?

Well, this is one area where job hunting and dating aren’t similar. It’s okay to say that you’re looking for a new job because your old one is leaving. It’s a widely understandable reason and not one that reflects poorly on you. So it’s fine to say that. It’s also fine to add that you might have been thinking about moving on sometime soon anyway because you want to move into a more responsible role. (Although, obviously don’t say this if you’ve only been in your current job for a year or some other small amount of time where that statement would make you look flighty.)

4. Thank-you notes when you already have another interview scheduled

I know how important it is to send thank-you notes after interviews but am unsure if/when to send one during a hiring process with multiple interviews. I just had a first interview with a manager and was called back for a second interview within hours. The second interview will be with the same manager as well as a director. While I certainly have some thoughts from our interview to follow up on in the thank-you note, I worry it will sound strange since we both know we will have a chance to discuss the thoughts in a week. What are your thoughts? Should a note be sent after each interview or only when there is no concrete plan to meet again?

Meh, I could go either way on this one. Since you already have a meeting scheduled for a week from now – and will presumably be sending a thank-you note (or follow-up note, which I think is a better way to view these) after that one — I think it’s fine to wait. But there would also be nothing wrong with sending them now too. I leave this one to you.

5. Is this a polite excuse to reject me?

I recently put in for a transfer for the same position in a different state. I did very well on the phone interview and was asked to drive up there to meet the team. The drive was 5 hours away, and I took that as a very good sign. The manager expressed her appreciation for my willingness to drive up there and than said she needed to speak to my current supervisor and would get back to me. Shouldn’t she have done that first before asking me to drive up there? Is this just a polite excuse to let me go without making an offer?

Yes, it would have been more considerate for her to do that before asking you to make the drive — but it’s also possible that she wanted to wait until you were a finalist before alerting your manager (which could also be considerate of her, depending on how your manager is likely to handle it).

But no, I wouldn’t assume that it’s just a polite excuse not to hire you. Polite excuses not to hire you generally contain clear statements of rejection, not an announcement of another step in the process. Another step in the process is … another step in the process. Not a rejection.

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…

1. A company I want to work for blocked me on social media

I became interested in a different industry a few years ago and have been trying to get in ever since. However, sometimes I have issues balancing my patience with my eagerness to make something happen. In one of my weaker moments, I wrote a blog post about my interest in the industry. Although I mentioned no specific companies in the blog, I posted the blog link on Twitter. The post title was “Why I Have a Crush on X Industry.” The whole thing was basically an analogy between a crush and my how X Industry had caught my attention. There are parallels, like unexpected attraction to something you have no personal experience with yet, etc. And when I posted it to Twitter, I tagged two prominent local companies in it.

I went to check one of those two companies and saw that their page no longer had an indication that I was following them (which I had been for awhile). Thinking there was a technical error or something, I clicked the Follow button, only to get a popup notifying me that I had been blocked from following them. Embarrassed, I quickly deleted the Twitter post and the blog post before something worse could happen.

After that, this company posted some other openings from time to time, but I didn’t apply, thinking it would be too soon. I didn’t want to become a nuisance or embarrass myself further. This company recently posted another opening. The position is low-level; it would definitely be entry level. But, it would also be an “in” into the industry. However, I’m wondering if I should apply, considering the past situation (which happened over a year ago). If I do apply and make it to the interview stage, do I need to address the issue or have a response prepared? Or do you think nobody would remember?

“Why I Have a Crush on X Industry” doesn’t sound like a terrible faux paus that should get you blocked — assuming your dating analogy didn’t cross lines into anything, uh, adult. So either someone over there just has really odd judgment, or it was a mistake (it’s actually pretty easy to mistakenly block someone on Twitter, so I wouldn’t discount that). In any case, I highly, highly doubt that they remember it (again, unless that blog post was truly inappropriate, but it doesn’t sound like it was), and you certainly don’t need to address it until directly asked about it. I’d go ahead and apply and not worry too much about this.

Read an update to this letter here.

2. My mentor declined to be a reference for me

I am planning to apply for a couple of positions and recently contacted a former supervisor to ask if I could list her as a reference. She was my direct supervisor for a year and instrumental in getting me promoted to my current position. After my promotion, she served as my mentor until her retirement several years ago. Since then, she has worked part-time in our profession and we have stayed in touch. Much to my surprise, she turned me down. She felt that she’s not qualified to be a reference for me because of how long she’s been retired, and thinks that I should use more current references.

The thing is, I DO have more current references and plan to use them. The reason I want to include her is that she has always spoken very highly of me and is someone whose opinion I have always valued. Also, I do not want to use my current supervisor for a number of reasons and she is the only other recent supervisor I could use. Although we have not worked together for the past few years, I think she can certainly speak to my strengths and weaknesses. Besides, she has always indicated that she would be happy to help me with my future endeavors and this certainly qualifies.

I am surprisingly upset by her rejection, and have not yet responded to her message. Would I be out of line to ask her to reconsider? Or should I just thank her for her honesty and leave it at that?

It’s not out of line if you make the request nicely, explain a little more of your thinking, and make it clear that you understand if she’d still prefer not to. And it’s possible that she thinks she’s doing you a favor by declining; she might think you’ll be better served by using other, more recent references, so giving her some context might change the way she’s looking at this. So, for instance, you could say something like, “I absolutely respect your decision either way, but in case your concern is simply recentness, you’re actually the most recent manager I’d feel comfortable using (I don’t plan to ask Jane for a reference while I’m currently working for her). Any other references I offer won’t be as recent as you are — so I’d still love for you to be one if you’re willing to, knowing that. But if not, that’s of course fine, and I really value our relationship either way.”

3. How much time should we let employees make up when they’re late?

We are a family-owned business and have around 70 employees. We are wondering if you have any information about allowing non-exempt/hourly employees to make up their time lost in the same week? This is referring to employees who leave early or come in late for appointments or personal obligations and even arriving late to work due to traffic, car trouble, etc.

Currently, it is up to supervisors if they want to allow their employees to make up time they lost (versus simply not earning wages for that time). However, we realize this is not fair if some allow time to be made up, while other supervisors do not. Should we only allow time to be made up for appointments or prescheduled absences? Should we allow employees to make up time if they are late due to traffic? Should we set a limit like 15 minutes late or less can be made up?

It’s really up to you, and it’s not inherently bad to have some managers allow it while others don’t; after all, different teams are working within different contexts, and managers should be the best judges of how that plays out on their teams. However, as a general principle, I’d say that you should allow people to make up time up to whatever point that will become disruptive. For instance, it might be perfectly feasible for someone to make up a hour by staying late on Thursday, but not possible for them to make up four hours that way because their work requires other people to be around, and the office will be empty at that point (or whatever). Or maybe you want to put limits on it because you’ve found that otherwise people won’t take their start times as seriously, and it’s important to you that they do. Or maybe none of this is true and you can give people a lot of freedom in this area — and maybe even some more than others, depending on what their particular job is.

Basically, don’t have rules for rules’ sake, but rather because it’s directly tied to a business need.

4. I can’t get the money my old employer owes me

I was on maternity leave and received a check from FMLA. The check was lost and payroll reissued the check as a direct deposit. The problem is when they reissued the check they put the gross amount as the net amount from the previous check. For instance original check Gross = $100, Net =$50. Reissued check Gross = $50, Net = $25. I was shorted over $700 in my case.

I have since stopped working for the company and trying to get the difference paid to me is impossible — I’m being bounced between payroll and benefits department and both are arguing that the other owes me the money, not them. Then it was escalated and I was told, “We owe you no money.” However they will NOT provide any sound reasoning. This is from a HUGE corporation. What do I do?

Contact your state labor agency and pursue it as a wage complaint. Your company is required to pay you the money they owe you, and they’re required to pay it within a specific time period (for most states, no later than the next scheduled payday, and for some either earlier then that), and some states also will impose penalties for late payments. You could also hire an attorney to handle this for you. I suspect a letter clearly spelling out the law and how they’re in violation of it — from either your state labor agency or your own attorney — will get this cleared up pretty quickly.

5. Can I ask my interviewer about their strengths and weaknesses?

My interviewer asked what is my greatest strength and weakness. Can I ask my interviewer the same question?

Sure, if you (a) ask it during the part of the interview when you’re asking your own questions, not as a comeback right after they ask it of you, (b) couch it in terms of asking about their management style specifically, and (c) are the type of person who ask this in a friendly, non-adversarial way that isn’t likely to alienate a reasonable person.