how to avoid freaking people out when summoning them to HR, a smaller bonus than expected, and more

by Alison Green on December 31, 2013

It’s five short answers to five short questions. Here we go…

1. How to avoid freaking people out when summoning them to HR

Our HR office often needs to call employees in (we are a large educational institution and have several unions, so employees also bring representatives to these meetings). We typically do this with a pretty curt summons. We do not, as a matter of course, offer the employee information on why they are being called in. The rationale behind that is, in part, so employees don’t have time to prepare a story or compare stories with other employees about disciplinary investigations. This leads to frequent consternation, employees want to why they’re being called in, etc. Not my policy, by the way.

I can see both sides of this. Since it is consistently an issue, and I have no related experience elsewhere, I’m wondering what the “best practice” is for calling employees into HR…is more or less information at the time of the meeting request better from a management standpoint? How would you recommend handling this?

If you’re just telling people, “Please come to HR at 2 p.m.” today and refusing to tell them why, then yeah, that’s going to cause some anxiety. People are going to wonder if they’re being fired, for one thing.

In circumstances where you don’t want to discuss the reasons for the meeting beforehand, such as during an investigation related to another employee, I’d think you could still add something like, “This doesn’t relate to your job performance at all, and there’s nothing to worry about. I’m hoping for your insights on a topic that I’ll explain when we meet.” (If the meeting does relate to their job performance, I don’t think you should try to hide that — but I’d assume/hope that their managers are the ones calling those meetings with them, not HR.)

2. My bonus was one-third of what I was told to expect

I just received my “end of year bonus.” It was a third of what I was told it would be when I was offered the position. That conversation included a negotiation of salary, or actually, my hourly pay. The hourly pay wasn’t enough to get me to sign on with the company. But factor in the end of year bonus, and it got me to my bottom number.

After I received the bonus, I was hurt to see it was a third of what I was told it would be. I asked the boss if this amount was based on any formula as to how well the company did on profit or if it was based on job performance. He said, “Neither, it’s just what I could afford.” I pointed out that when I was offered the job, he mentioned a number three times that amount. He said, “It was a hard year. I’m ready for 2013 to be over. It was all I could afford.” And then he couldn’t leave the building fast enough. I don’t know if I was making him uncomfortable or hurt his ego. I was sure wishing he would remember our conversation.

Yeah, the problem with relying on promised bonuses is that if they’re not in writing and they’re in any way discretionary, there’s no guarantee that you’ll definitely get them. They can be shrunk or revoked for all kinds of reasons — job performance, company performance, new manager, personality conflict, etc.

At this point, you probably need to go back to your manager and explain that they only reason you were able to take the job is because you were told that this would be part of your compensation and ask what can be done — but if the money isn’t there, it’s not there.

3. Asking to do more work in the evenings

I’m in a newer job (9 months), and while I have plenty of work (but I’m still able to leave after ~8 hrs), part of me still gets a little bored in the evening and on weekends. I truly love this job and would almost do this work as a hobby/side project (in fact, I did do similar work to a point in my old job with no requirement to do so, and no direct benefit — this new job really is a perfect fit). I don’t want to be completely swamped with work, but I’d love to have little things to work on in my down time — nothing urgently due, but something to work on while watching TV. What I’m picturing is taking something that would normally be assigned out 3 months from now with a 2 day due date, but getting it now instead of later, so even if it takes me 2 weeks to get it done while watching TV, it’s still done 2.5 months before it would be otherwise. And I would understand it’s not the current priority, so I wouldn’t take “work” time to finish it. Doing my active projects at home wouldn’t be the same, since after 8 hours with them, I want a change of pace. And I’m exempt, so there’s no issue with having to pay me more for the extra work.

My problem is: do I ask for this? How? I don’t want to seem like a brown-noser or that I’m hogging work, I just really love what I do and can’t get enough of it! Or do I just keep quiet?

I’m not sure this is the best plan. A good manager might give you a few extra projects here and there but isn’t going to be comfortable doing it on an ongoing basis, because she’ll be wary of you burning out (or expecting to be rewarded for it later, which she might not be ready to set you and herself up for). Plus, once you set the expectation that you can do X amount of work, it may be difficult to backtrack on that if at some point you want your evenings back.

Instead, is there some other way you can spend your time that will help you build your skills in this area, like volunteering for a nonprofit that needs similar work done?

4. Finding out how much my company pays toward our health insurance

It’s the end of the year, so it’s also time for the open enrollment period for next year’s insurance benefits. For 2014, my share of the insurance premiums are going to be about 15% higher than this year (with no change in plan or benefits). Since my insurance is subsidized through my employer, this doesn’t amount to as much as it would if I had to shoulder the full cost, but it’s still somewhat substantial.

While filling out paperwork with my benefits coordinator, I asked if this increase represented a decrease in our company’s subsidy for the plan, an increase in the “real” cost of the plan, or some combination thereof. She said that she couldn’t tell me, as she wasn’t a party to those sorts of conversations.

No matter the answer, I’ll end up paying whatever I need to be able to keep my health insurance, but it left me wondering: Is this something I should reasonably expect an employer to answer? Do I have the right to know the total, unsubsidized cost of my health insurance?

Sure, it’s a reasonable question — and in fact, many employers are eager to share that information, because employees often don’t realize (and appreciate hearing) that their company is shouldering a significant portion of their monthly premium cost. That’s not true at all companies, of course, but either way, it’s certainly reasonable to ask about — not only because it’s interesting to know what your company contributes toward health care, but also because it gives you a better understanding of the true cost of your plan.

5. Putting a leadership development program on your resume

How and where should I put a leadership development program on a CV? I have participated in 2-year finance leadership development program at my company. I guess quite a few large companies have such. It’s a program for selected individuals who are trained on and off-job to become future leaders (as they told us) or just a highly useful employee who built a network within company. I do not want to continue a career in finance despite the fact that I’ve finished the program, but I believe it is worth mentioning. However, I am not sure how to correctly describe it and where to put it on the resume (before or after experience).

I’d actually just put it as one of the bullet points under that particular job, as something that you did there. No need for it to be in a different section.

You may also like:
{ 137 comments }

my favorite posts of 2013

by Alison Green on December 30, 2013

We had more posts here in 2013 than ever before — 1,118 this year so far — so it was particularly hard to pick my favorites. But here’s a stab at it anyway.

10. Stop thinking you’re applying for your dream job
Because I hear way too many people say it, and it gets old having to think “um, maybe not” each time.

9. My boss is requiring us to let him be our “life coach”
Because it’s the perfect combination of bad management and absurdity, and I crack up every time I picture it.

8. I’m getting a raise — how should I manage my money?
Because we rarely get to talk about this topic, and it’s a huge one.

7. How to assert your legal rights at work
Because it should have been one of my first posts back in 2007, but it took me six years to think to write it.

6. Please stop calling it a “big girl” job
Because language matters.

5. My boss is always making out with his girlfriend at work
Because my nieces answered this one!

4. Yes, it’s legal … queries from a combined 13 years of blogging
Because I’m asked so, so often. And because I got to write something with Suzanne Lucas.

3. The problem with perfectionism
I didn’t even have to write this one. And also because it’s brilliant.

2. Signs that you’re the problem
Because sometimes you are, and if you don’t recognize it, you’ll go on being unhappy.

1. An employee is putting magic curses on her coworkers 
Because, magic! And curses!

Want more? Here’s my list from 2012 and the one from 2011.

You may also like:
{ 53 comments }

7 new year’s resolutions for a stronger career in 2014

by Alison Green on December 30, 2013

If you’re making new year’s resolutions this year — or even if you’re not — I’ve got seven choices to pick from for your career.

1. Set one or two big goals – and create plans to meet them. If you’ve spent this month wondering where the year went and what you have to show for it, vow not to let that happen in 2014. What do you want to achieve in the coming year so that you’re not sitting around in December 2014 wondering how the time got away from you? Figure out now what would make the year successful for you and create a plan to make it happen, complete with monthly or quarterly benchmarks. (But when it comes to big goals, stick to just one or two, so that you’re not pulled in so many directions that none of it gets done.)

2. Delegate more.If you’re at a level in your career where you can delegate work to others, you’re probably not taking full advantage of the opportunity. If you’re like many people, you’re holding on to projects that someone else could do because the work is comfortable or you don’t trust anyone else to do it right. But refusing to delegate means that you won’t free yourself up to take on bigger and more important pieces of work, which will hold you back – and can also hold your junior colleagues back too, by denying them the ability to grow into the work you currently do.

3. Stop taking criticism personally. It’s easy to take criticism as a personal attack or as a signal that everything you’ve done right isn’t appreciated, but that approach will harm you in the long run – by preventing you from truly hearing feedback that will help you in your career, and even by discouraging people from giving you valuable feedback in the future. Instead, try to remember that even if you ultimate disagree with the criticism, it’s still valuable for you to understand how your work is perceived, and resolve to respond to criticism the same way you would any other business issue – because it is business, not personal.

4. Start a “kudos” file. Set up a file (electronic or paper) to keep the kudos that you receive from people throughout the year – whether it’s an email from your boss praising your work on that big project, a thank-you from a client for making their life easier, or a note from a coworker thanking you for your help on a last-minute emergency. When you’re having a bad day, looking through this file can remind you that you’re good at what you do – and it can also help you remember things you’ve done well when performance evaluations roll around at the end of the year or when you’re asking for a raise.

5. Take a real vacation. Working for a whole year without a real respite is bad for your mental health and even bad for your productivity, so vow to take at least a full week – and preferably two – off from work in 2014. If you can’t afford to travel anywhere, spend the time relaxing at home, unplugged from email and other demands of your office. (And do this without guilt! If you get vacation days as part of your benefits package, that time is as much a part of your compensation as salary is. Don’t have qualms about using it.)

6. Turn off the complaining. If occasional venting about your job, your company, your coworkers, or your boss has turned into regular complaining, resolve to go cold turkey on January 1. Chronic complaining can create a toxic environment for you and the people who have to listen to you, and it can color your own perspective to the point that you become even more unhappy. Put a moratorium on complaining and see if it changes your mindset. If it doesn’t, decide whether you’re willing to live with whatever is making you so unhappy, complain to someone who can actually do something about it, or change your circumstances.

7. Stretch yourself. If you’re like a lot of people, you prefer to contain your work in areas where you’re comfortable and know that you can succeed. This approach is a safe one, but it also lowers the chances that you’ll make major leaps beyond where you currently are – and it can mean that you’re left behind by more risk-tolerant peers. Instead, make 2014 the year you do something well beyond your comfort level – whether it’s learning a new skill, proposing and leading a new project, or even just showing up at networking events.

I originally published this at U.S. News & World Report.

You may also like:
{ 20 comments }

my boss opened a personal package that was addressed to me

by Alison Green on December 30, 2013

This was originally published on August 19, 2010.

A reader writes:

My own postman is unreliable, so I often have book orders from amazon, half.com and ebay sent to me at work. The other day, my boss opened a package addressed to me and was offended. He wasn’t offended that I had something mailed to me at work, he was offended by the subject matter that the book dealt with (sex). I asked him why he opened a package addressed to me and he replied that he is the boss and can open my mail if it is coming to a business he manages.

It is indeed legal. Postal regulations say that mail delivered to an organization, even if addressed to a specific person, is delivered to the organization itself, and the organization can decide how to distribute it from there.

But as is so often the case, the question of what’s legal is different from the question of what’s polite.

I don’t know if your boss opened your package on purpose or by mistake. It’s certainly not that hard to accidentally open someone else’s mail without meaning to; I’ll often just open anything left in my in-box without thinking to look at the address, and I’ve sometimes opened something meant for someone else by mistake. But if it was a mistake, the correct response is “I’m sorry, this was inadvertent,” not “too bad, I’m entitled to do it if I want.” And if it was intentional, your boss is an ass. So really, either way, he’s kind of an ass.

Now, that said, there’s also the question of what’s smart. Having books on sex sent to your work address, when it is sooooo easy for a package sent to a work address to be accidentally opened by someone else? Not necessarily the smartest thing to do. I don’t know if this was some academic treatise on sexual issues,  which really shouldn’t offend someone, or something a bit more, uh, lowbrow, but if it was the latter, you were kind of asking for trouble.

I completely understand the desire to have your packages sent to your work address. I used to do it all the time when I had a UPS man who refused to leave packages without a signature. But (a) not every business welcomes or even permits it, and (b) it’s not a good idea for things you wouldn’t want someone else to see.

You may also like:
{ 120 comments }

the worst boss of 2013 is…

by Alison Green on December 30, 2013

JoffreyWe have a winner!  1,975 votes are in, and the worst boss of the year is the manager who fired a receptionist after another employee asked him to reimburse her business expenses … with 42% of the vote. Congratulations, terrible manager of the year! You suck.

The four runners-up, who managed to be pretty terrible in their own right:

* the manager who spent the money from an office bereavement collection on herself – 27%

* the manager who ordered an employee to come to work during a dangerous tornado while police were telling people to take cover – 20%

* 

* the manager who spread a false rumor that an employee was dying – 3%

You may also like:
{ 42 comments }

the least popular posts of 2013

by Alison Green on December 29, 2013

As part of our best-of lists for the end of the year, I decided to take a look at the posts that garnered the least discussion in 2013 (excluding updates, housekeeping-type posts, and posts that just linked to my articles somewhere else).

(This is no reflection on the question-askers! All of these questions are actually quite interesting, at least to me, and hopefully this will get them back on people’s radars.)

10. Recruiter flipped out when I asked about the company’s recent struggles

9. Can I include the value of my benefits when I talk about my current salary?

8. Short answer Saturday — 7 short answers to 7 short questions

7. Why is it bad to sound naive when applying for jobs?

6. What to do when your employer illegally treats you as a contractor

5. Am I ready to move on from my first job?

4. How to figure out how well you’re doing in your job and talk about it in a performance evaluation

3. If an interviewer invites me to contact them with questions, does it look bad if I don’t?

2. Can I ask about flexible hours in a job interview?

1. Where’s the travel reimbursement I was promised for interviewing?

You may also like:
{ 17 comments }

update: my boss gave me a choice of offices but is punishing me for the one I chose

by Alison Green on December 29, 2013

Remember the reader whose boss gave her a choice of offices — and then punished her for the one she chose? Here’s her update.

I’m afraid this update isn’t an extremely happy one. Not too long after I got some responses from my original question, I went to my manager and asked if there was anything else I could do and if she would rather I moved to the office directly next to her (the “used to be a closet” office). I was told that everything was fine and not to worry about it. As it turns out, I should have been worried.

In October, I had to report for a week long jury duty summons. Prior to going on jury duty, I asked if I needed to do anything and was told that in the past people wrote letters to try to be exempted and I could do that if I wanted to. I decided that, as a young woman with no family or obligations that would prevent me from going, I would not be exempt anyway and just went to Jury Duty thinking everything was fine. I ended up taking 3 days. Every day I got an email from my manager insisting that I update her on the status of the day. (did I get called for a jury, when will I be coming back).

When I returned to the office on Thursday, I was told that I had to move my office ‘by the end of the day’ and that no one had time to help me and I would just have to figure out how to get my desk in there. I was also called into a disciplinary meeting shortly thereafter that called my work ethic into question due to the Jury Duty. I was told that they value people who prioritize their responsibilities. When I asked what responsibility I had not met (I made sure everyone knew where I would be and delegated any time-sensitive work to co-workers) and apparently when they told me that when I was told that “in the past people have written letters to try to be exempt…etc.” that was meant to be an order. Then they took away 3 of my vacation days to “pay” for the 3 days of jury duty. I apologized for the misunderstanding and assured them that I meant no disrespect and was not trying to shirk any responsibilities.

After that, I immediately consulted my employee handbook and outlined the policy on Jury Duty. (It is one sentence “The Bank will pay your normal wages for the period of service.”) I took it right back to them and asked why my vacation days are being taken away and is this meant to be a punishment for a misunderstanding, showing them the highlighted portion of the policy. They immediately back pedaled and gave me my vacation days back. And in the meeting I also mentioned that, after doing some research, I noticed that in Pennsylvania it is actually illegal to require your employees to attempt to ‘get out of’ jury duty before allowing them to go. And she said to me, “Well, that’s why we don’t write it down but we still need you to try to do that in the future.” I was also told that I need to learn to ‘read between the lines’ and ask myself ‘what do they REALLY want from me in this situation’.

After that debacle, everything kind of slowed down and it seems to be going ok. My manager still has her moments, but she hasn’t been as unreasonable as she was before. It’s possible that she’s being nicer because she got her way and thinks I have been defeated. I am still debating whether I want to give this place another year, just so I can put the experience on my resume or if I want to start looking in January after I take my year-end vacation.

I wish I could give you a better update, but I guess it is what it is!

You may also like:
{ 120 comments }

update from the reader applying for a job with someone she’d previously worked for

by Alison Green on December 28, 2013

Remember the reader back in January who asked about writing a cover letter to someone who you’d previously worked for (#6 at the link)? Here’s her update.

First of all, I would just like to thank you from the bottom of my heart for your fantastic blog. Without the wonderful and extremely helpful advice from you and your commenters, I am sure that I would still be lost beyond belief at this point. Instead, now a year and a half after graduating, I just accepted my first permanent job offer in my field!

You answered a question of mine about the tone of a cover letter to someone with whom you’ve previously worked. Thanks to your answer, I went on to rock the cover letter as well as the interview, but ultimately lost out on the job due to something completely beyond my control (they needed a native Spanish speaker who would be comfortable talking on the phone in Spanish with Cubans, and that just wasn’t me). However, I took the rejection graciously and kept in contact because they had given me my start in DC with an internship, and they’re all just such great people that I couldn’t possibly be upset with them for too long!

After that, I finished out the other internship I was working at the time, although I was pretty unhappy with the 40-hour/week workload on top of the part-time serving job I needed to make ends meet. Once that ended in May, I took up temp work while continuing to apply and interview for permanent positions. Finally, in the past month or so, I interviewed for a job with a wonderful, highly-regarded organization doing exactly the kind of work I want to get into (communications in the nonprofit NGO world), and just yesterday, they came through with an offer, which I accepted! Oh, and I had applied for this job way back in July, proving that you really can’t hold hiring managers to any one timeline.

As it turns out, what made the difference for me was my references. I had previously been in denial about the importance of having stellar references, and it wasn’t until I finally asked one of mine if she had been contacted that she told me she wasn’t comfortable giving me a reference because of my admittedly less-than-great attitude at the aforementioned internship. Instead of negotiating with her, and realizing that my third reference was no longer reachable at the number I had provided (oops!), I chose to ask two other people if I could list them, and they very enthusiastically obliged. When called, all three raved about me to the hiring manager, and one even went so far as to attend the event the organization was hosting the next day to tell them in person how great I am! I am convinced that my references were one of the biggest factors in the decision to offer me the job.

Once again — and I do apologize for the length of this — thank you so much for all of the lessons your blog has helped me learn over the past year. I am a more dedicated reader now more than ever, although still a very seldom commenter! Maybe now that I’ve been blessed with an offer I’ll be able to pay it forward to other confused, frustrated recent grads and help them realize their potential.

You may also like:
{ 18 comments }

update from the manager who didn’t want to eat lunch with her employee every day

by Alison Green on December 27, 2013

Remember the manager who wanted to stop feeling obligated to eat lunch with her employee every day? Here’s her update.

First and foremost, I had a great experience with you and the community on your site. Your insight, as well as comments from others, put a lot of things in perspective. The major takeaway: I was definitely making a bigger deal out of this than I needed to be.

“Dan” is such a nice guy (I cannot stress this enough). Any little disappointment he showed around “ditching” was noticeable, and a contrast from his upbeat nature. Simply wanting to avoid seeing that because — as other readers pointed out — I was also trying to be “too nice” was a big source of me inflating this problem.

I have since experienced a few instances of miscommunication (reading into things, or not reading into things) with Dan, so I have learned that being straightforward is the best approach.

Coincidentally, we have not been eating lunch together, as a duo or a trio, quite as often. I started taking a work-offered yoga class on Tuesdays, so that was one day I was always out for sure. Then, just as luck would have it, we’ve all taken turns not being available. The best thing about this change, in my opinion, is that we actually enjoy lunch together more, as we have more to catch up on. Absence makes the “heart” (even work, professional heart) grow stronger, I guess.

This whole experience was very helpful. I’m grateful for your site and the community, and I look forward to learning and growing as a manager.

You may also like:
{ 12 comments }

vote for the worst boss of 2013

by Alison Green on December 27, 2013

We’ve read about plenty of bad bosses this year, and now it’s time to vote on the worst one of the whole year.

In fact, we’ve had so many that in selecting these finalists, I was forced to pick managers who aren’t just bad managers but also terrible humans (which sadly excluded the water cooler emergency manager and the one who wanted everyone to give feedback while facing each other in lines).

We’ll crown the worst boss of the year on Monday, based on your votes … so please vote below. (Voting ends at 11:59 p.m. Sunday.)

[polldaddy poll=”7673404″]

You may also like:
{ 135 comments }