Ask a Manager

It’s five short answers to five short questions. Here we go…

1. Should we tell our new boss about our terrible department assistant?

There are currently 3 people in my department — me, an excellent coworker, and our departmental assistant. Our department assistant is for the most part terrible: she refuses to answer phone calls, generally finds excuses not to complete tasks we give her, and often disappears for hours on long lunches or to hang out at other people’s desk. Our long-time boss was let go a month ago, so my excellent coworker and I are basically carrying the weight of the whole department, working longer hours than usual to keep up with the work. When our assistant claims she doesn’t have time to complete the projects we give her, I end up having to do them myself.

When our new boss begins, should my coworker or I warn her about our terrible departmental assistant? Our last boss had wanted to get rid of her, but never made any progress before she herself was let go. I can’t tell if it’s our assistant’s general bad attitude, or she’s not interested in the line of work, but honestly we would rather fire her and have someone else step in. Is it okay to warn the new boss, or should we let her discover this nightmare herself?

You should absolutely tell her. You don’t need to get into what your last boss was planning on doing but never did, but you should lay out the facts as they have affected you: The assistant refuses to answer calls, won’t complete work you assign her, and disappears for hours at a time. You wanted to lean on her for help while the department was short-staffed, but she refused to help.

It’s absolutely appropriate to give this kind of feedback; it’s not about “warning” your new boss, but rather about alerting her to a serious problem in the department that is affecting your work and needs to be dealt with quickly, to minimize its ongoing impact.

Also, does the assistant report to anyone currently — an interim manager or anyone like that? If so, that person should be addressing this with her now, not waiting for the new manager to start.

2. How can I stop gossip on my staff?

I am a new manager with a team of six administrative staff. There is a pervasive culture of gossiping among the team that I am at a loss about how to address. The gossiping is all about (perceived) work performance – two of them will stand in a corner and whisper about how a third did the mail run late today, or wasn’t at the reception desk when an important guest arrived, or didn’t empty the dishwasher when it was her turn. And it’s not just two bad eggs, they all gossip about each other.

I’ve encouraged all of them to come to me with any issues about team performance or tasks being completed (especially since often the gossiping is unfair – the gossipers don’t realise I have given their colleague a specific task with instructions that it is to be done in advance of their other duties). This doesn’t seem to be working.

Should I sit them all down at a team meeting and tell them that gossiping is not OK and I won’t tolerate it? And call them out when I see them doing it? I worry that would make me seem like a teacher, not a manager.

You’ve asked them to come to you with concerns, but have you told them directly to stop gossiping? It doesn’t sound like it, and that needs to be your first step: explicit feedback about what you want to see change. Raise it at your next team meeting, explain that it’s creating a toxic atmosphere that will harm productivity and morale, and that effective immediately, anyone who wants to discuss something negative should be discussing it with someone who can help solve the problem, not gossiping with people who can’t. In other words, you’re implementing a no-gossip policy, and yes, that’s a thing.

If it continues after that, talk with the individual perpetrators one-on-one and explain the consequences if the behavior continues (in other words, treat it just like any other performance problem that has consequences attached — and it is indeed reasonable to replace people over this if they’re poisoning your culture). Make sure you’re also modeling the behavior you want to see; you need to walk the walk on this.

This isn’t schoolmarmish of you; managers absolutely should talk explicitly about the culture they want to see and address behaviors that are out of sync with that culture.

3. How can I ask my internship manager why my hours are decreasing?

I’m currently a part-time student with a couple of (paying!) internships that are keeping me afloat financially. I’ve been very lucky in my field in terms of these internships, especially to get paying ones. Lately, though, one of my internships has been reducing my hours, and I’m not sure why. There was no formal agreement when I was hired on time per week or length of the position, but there was an informal discussion where I was offered 12 hours/week, with the possibility of working there for the next two years that I am in school.

But now, as I said, my hours have been reduced, and I haven’t been given any reason. I do have a couple of theories about why this might be happening, but obviously no evidence or solid reason either way. Over the past month, I’ve worked eight, six, three, and five hours/week. As you can imagine, this has had a pretty significant impact on my budget, and I’d like to talk to my boss about why my hours have dropped so drastically.

I’m worried that my boss might be phasing me out and/or planning to fire me, though I don’t have any real evidence to support either fear. Obviously I don’t want to be fired, so if that’s what my boss is moving towards, I’d rather have a conversation with him and find an arrangement that works (even if it means I end up no longer having a job there). What would be the best way to approach this conversation? Especially given that, schedule-wise, it looks like I might end up having to do it via phone or email. I was planning on starting a chat with him about planning my schedule for next semester – would that be a good way to introduce the topic?

Yep, that’s a perfect opener (although if you didn’t have that easy segue, you could still just call or email about this). I’d say something like: “I was hoping we could talk about my hours. I’ve been scheduled for fewer and fewer hours these last few weeks. Is that because of the holidays, or something you think is likely to continue? I’d like to get a sense of what’s realistic to expect going forward.” If your boss says that they won’t go back up or if she avoids the question, then I’d say: “Can I ask — are there are any concerns about my work that are impacting my schedule? If there are, I’d really want to know so that I can try to improve.”

4. Can I ask for a raise while I’m also applying for another internal job?

I have been planning to ask for a significant raise for a few months (we do annual salary adjustments at 3%). However, a higher level position that I think I am very qualified for just opened up in another department and I am considering applying for it. Is it weird to ask for a raise in my current position, then move forward with an application for the other one? My current supervisor is also the hiring manager for the other position.

I’d normally do it separately — apply for the other job, and then if you don’t get it, ask for a raise at that point. However, since your current manager is also the manager for the position you want to apply for, it might make sense to just lay it all out for her and explain that you think you’ve earned a raise in your current role, and that you’re also interesting in being promoted into the other position and would like to talk to her about both of those things.

5. Leaving a temp job early

This is more of a curiosity-question than an urgent-needs question. I just applied to a part-time job that ends in June or when [high ranking position] is filled, whichever happens sooner. You mentioned in one of your blog posts that you can take a job knowing you’ll quit it as soon as something better comes along if you’re up-front about this to the employer from the beginning or if it’s a job where there is typically high turnover.

What about when the job is temporary and can end at any time? I assume it’d be annoying for the employer to lose a temp worker only a month or three into a short-term job, but it seems unreasonable for anyone to expect an employee to commit to six months when they might get let go much sooner. I’ve never applied/been hired to a temp position before, so sorry if this is a really newbish question.

Yes, if they’re telling you that the job could end at any time (more so than the typical at-will employment situation), it’s unreasonable for them to expect you not to be actively looking for other work. The exception to this would be if they had stressed at the start that they really needed someone who could commit for X months, even though they couldn’t guarantee the work would last that long. In that case, you’d be operating in bad faith to make an explicit agreement like that if you knew you weren’t willing to keep it.

It’s five short answers to five short questions. Here we go…

1. Should I tell an employer that if hired, I’d change their hiring practices?

I am interviewing for a position that will including things like hiring new employees. One of the practices they currently have is making candidates fill out a salary progression / history form. If hired, it’s the first practice I will get rid of. I have confidence in my judgment. I don’t need to know what a person was worth to a different company. If asked what I would do in the first 30 days (60 days, whatever), should I say that? Or should I pick something that isn’t relevant to me?

(By the way, their policy has no impact on me. The salary I’ll be asking for, if it gets to that point, is within their range, supported by my history, and well within industry/area standards for my experience. I can “pass” their test. I just think it’s dumb.)

I’m glad to hear you’d change that because I agree it’s a senseless practice and one that invades candidates’ privacy, but I don’t think I’d use it as an answer to what you’d do in your first 30 days. First, it’s probably not a substantive enough answer to that question (and they’re probably not looking for an answer about eliminating any practice after only four weeks on the job anyway), and second, it’s a somewhat contentious stance to take in an interview context.

2. Can I ask an employer to match a counter-offer from my current job?

I might be about to get an offer from a new job. If my current employer counter offers, is it ethical for me to ask the new company to match it? If so, how do I go about it? I would hate to offend them and have my offer rescinded.

Ethical? Sure. Smart? Probably not. You’ll basically be telling them that you’re not actually interested in leaving your job after all unless they can match a counter-offer, which says you’re going to the highest bidder, even if it’s the job you wanted to leave. A lot of good managers will lose interest at that point.

I’d say that if you want to stay at your current job if you can get more money there, ask for a raise. But don’t use a counter-offer to do it (for the reasons I talk about here).

3. How do I get headhunted?

I often see questions from folks on your site saying something like, “I was headhunted and …” or “A headhunter called me…” or something to that effect. First, are headhunters and recruiters the same thing? And second, how do I get headhunted? How do I put out feelers to let a headhunter know I’m job hunting and I’d like them to consider me for jobs that are a good fit? Can I even do this, or do they prefer to use a network of contacts determine who is worthy?

Headhunters and recruiters are basically the same thing. Sometimes “headhunter” is used to refer to an independent consultant while “recruiter” refers to someone working with a search firm or working internally within the hiring company, but you’ll generally hear the terms used interchangeably.

As for how to work with them, you can ask around in your field about headhunters that others recommend, and then reach out to them. You can also check the websites of recruiting firms in your field; many of them will list the openings that they’re recruiting for. Or you can just apply for jobs that interest you; if some of them are being handled by headhunters and that person reaches out to you, you can try to form a broader relationship with them.

Keep in mind, though, that headhunters work for employers, not candidates, and they have specific jobs to fill, just like would be the case if you applied directly to an employer. In most fields, especially if you don’t have a lot of experience or sought-after skills, you can’t really just pick out a recruiter and decide to work with them; they need to approach you about a specific job.

4. Will I be eligible for unemployment?

If I have to reapply for my job and don’t get it, will I receive unemployment benefits?

Almost certainly. In most states, if you lose your job for anything other than deliberate misconduct, you’ll be eligible for unemployment.

5. How much can I volunteer before I have to be paid?

About 5 years ago, I lost a permanent job during the recession. Since then, I have taken on a few other temp jobs to supplement my income. Being that I have had a lot of downtime between temp jobs, I decided I would start volunteering. I am volunteering for a government entity. I didn’t mind the work at first and actually enjoyed what I was doing. Everyone, including the department I work in, treats me like I am an employee even though I am not.

At first, I was only working 16 hours a week there. Then the volunteer coordinator asked me to do more hours (28 hours per week). Figuring that I could get more experience faster, I agreed. About 2 months later, I found that another employee was thinking of leaving the department. I continued with the hours, thinking I could eventually have the job of the employee leaving or at least get in as a temporary associate. Though the associate changed departments, I was never put into a paid position at the office because everything is unionized and I need to take an exam given only once per year in November. I currently have at least 700 hours of volunteering under my belt.

My question to you is, how many hours can a person volunteer before they have to be paid for their services?

It’s unlimited. There’s no requirement that they pay you after a certain number of hours. If you’ve signed on as a volunteer, they’re assuming that you’re happy to continue to volunteer until you tell them that you’re not.

There’s also no obligation on the part of the employer to give a volunteer preferential treatment when it comes to hiring. So only volunteering in order to eventually get hired there, you might end up frustrated and resentful. If you’re no longer happy to be volunteering, or volunteering for this many hours, then you should stop volunteering or decrease your hours.

Additionally, in your case, if they can’t hire you until you take that annual exam, it makes no sense to be frustrated that they’re not paying you yet. It sounds like they’ve been straightforward with you that that’s the case. If you want to get hired there, plan on taking that exam in November. Whether or not to continue volunteering in the interim is up to you. (You might also talk with your contacts there about the likelihood of getting hired once you do; you don’t want to assume that it’s a sure thing once the exam is done.)

It’s five short answers to five short questions. Here we go…

1. How to ask if I’m getting paid for work I’ve been doing or if it’s volunteer work

I would like to nominate myself for stupid question-asker of the year.

I did some at-home work for a nonprofit a few weeks ago that was paid for with the remainder of a grant. Recently, they contacted me and asked if I was available to do more of the same type of work. I agreed to do it, picked up the materials, and have done about 25 hours of what’ll probably be 50 hours of work. I assumed the work would be paid even though it wasn’t explicitly mentioned, and now I’m wondering if they wanted me to do it for free, because they have a volunteer working on the same thing (though she was also working on it when I was doing the paid work before), and if the grant was used up, where are they getting the money to pay me?

Is there a way to ask if this is paid work without sounding as stupid as I feel? Or do I just hope they ask for my hours at some point? I’d send them the hours I’ve done so far since it’s been two weeks (I was paid biweekly before), but I’m afraid they’ll respond with, “Um, weren’t you doing this for free?” and it’ll be twenty kinds of awkward. I’d still finish the work even if I found out I wasn’t getting paid since I already agreed to do it, but I’d just feel better if I knew if I was getting paid or not instead of wondering about it.

Unless they specifically asked you to do this as a volunteer, I would assume that you’re still getting paid. It would be utterly unreasonable of them to just assume that you understood that you’d no longer be getting paid, since you were previously being paid for; this is something reasonable to assume they’d tell you about. So I would simply submit your hours just as you did before, and assume that pay will be forthcoming. If you still feel weird about doing that, though, then it’s fine to send an email saying, “Should I submit my hours using the same process that I did before, or do you want me doing anything differently?”

2. Applying for a job with my ex-boyfriend’s dad

So, I’m looking at this bangin’ internship with the… wait for it… OLYMPICS! Awesome, right? Here’s the thing: One of the people that I assume would end up seeing my paperwork would be my ex boyfriend’s dad. So:

1) Is it weird if I apply?
2) My ex’s parents never hated me; in fact, I’m still friends with them on Facebook and communicate with them often.
3) Because of my previous statement, is it weird to namedrop?
4) Wouldn’t this look so amazing on a resume?
5) Am I being immature about this whole thing?

No, it’s not weird to apply. It wouldn’t be weird even if you weren’t still communicating with your ex’s parents, but it’s especially not weird since you are. I’d really consider his parents as being just like anyone else you know, and apply the same “not weird” standards to them that you would if they were, say, family friends.

And in fact, you should send your ex-boyfriend’s dad an email and let him know that you’re applying, because he may put in a good word for you.

3. Should you offer your business card at a job interview?

What is the etiquette on using your current business card at an interview? I’m leaning against it – they already have my contact info, so I don’t need to give them a card. However, our business cards are unique and it will make me stand out a little.

I don’t think it really matters either way. I wouldn’t, just because they already have you info so it seems like overkill — plus you’re not there as a representative of your employer, so your business card is a slightly ill fit for the situation. But it’s no big deal either way.

4. How can I keep my manager from making a scene at my goodbye party?

I have been bullied by my line manager for the last year and i have made the decision to leave my job. My problem is that i don’t trust him not to turn up to my leaving party and make a scene. Can you advise me how i can prevent him from coming without putting the idea in his head in the first place?

Unless your manager is truly evil, it seems unlikely he’d make a scene — and if he did, it would reflect more on him than on you. But if you’re concerned, just decline the party. You can’t have one and then forbid your manager from attending.

5. My company fired me but is offering to send my resume to other companies

I have a question about finding another job after being fired. Here’s what happened. “Sarah,” someone senior to me and the only other person on my team, was a perfectionist and needed to be in control. Because of this, she delegated no work to me and left me in the dark on most projects, and thus I came off as “not doing much” even though I always asked for more work. Well, finally this issue came to a head and my boss put me under review, and at the same time Sarah was instructed to delegate to me and include me (before I was not included in the majority of projects and tasks).

Well, at this exact time, several *huge* projects came up, and I was tasked with taking the lead on several these — and I believe I did a good job all things considered. One of my weekly check-ins with my boss ended with him patting me on the back and saying “You’re doing a good job.” But when our weekly check-in came around this week, I was taken straight to HR, told I was terminated, and was escorted out. This came as a total surprise because even though I was under review, I had received nothing but positive feedback, with the exception of small email formatting edits. This job was toxic and I am much happier away from the negative environment, but now I’m looking for a new position.

Here’s my question. During the termination meeting with HR, the HR manager mentioned several times that he would help me out if I found any other positions I was interested in. He said if I found any other jobs I was interested in, I should let him know and he would forward my resume to the respective hiring managers. I asked him what the benefit of doing this was, and he said that it looks better if a resume comes from someone in HR rather than the person themselves. But that makes no sense to me! This company decided I wasn’t good enough for them, but now they want to help me find something else? Why do they care what happens to me now? I was not let go for any willful misconduct (other than not being up to their standards that they still can’t define), but still why would they want to help me? It all seems so strange. But is this normal? Does this usually happen?

I don’t think it’s weird that your company is offering to help you find another job; that’s not uncommon, and just because you weren’t right for one particular job with them doesn’t mean that they think you wouldn’t be right for plenty of other jobs with plenty of other companies. However, I do think it’s weird that he’s suggesting that he send your resume to companies himself. It’s great for him to do that with his own contacts, but just to random companies where you happen to be applying and where he doesn’t have contacts? That’s odd, and I don’t think I’d take him up on that.

It’s five short answers to five short questions. Here we go…

1. Appropriate gifts for office gift exchanges, and getting gifts on sale

First, what makes an appropriate gift for a holiday gift exchange at the office? My colleagues and I will be drawing names, and we’ve agreed to include a short “wish list” of gifts within the stated limit that we would be happy to receive. The last thing I need is more candles and lotion, but what sort of gifts are OK to request, and what is too personal? Can I ask for a butter dish (mine broke) or a novel I’ve been wanting to read (something respectable, not a trashy romance)?

Secondly, what are the rules regarding dollar limits and sales? Our office has set a $15 limit. It’s a paltry sum to most of my colleagues (one lawyer scoffed at the idea of a $5 gift – “I don’t need more junk!”) but really significant to me. My husband and I are struggling to pay for his graduate school, and aren’t even sure if we will be exchanging gifts ourselves this year. If I buy a gift for a colleague that is normally priced at $15 but I get on sale or with a coupon for less, can I pass that off as my $15 gift or am I ethically bound to actually spend all $15 on my coworker?

Sure, a book or a butter dish would be totally appropriate. I’d say that pretty much anything in that dollar limit would be fine, as long as it’s not obviously work-inappropriate (which basically means anything with even a hint of sex to it).

And there’s absolutely nothing wrong with using coupons, sales, or other discounts on your gift. The $15 is a benchmark to ensure people are exchanging gifts of roughly equivalent value, but how you obtain that item is your own business.

2. My husband is my boss, and I need him to fill out a recommendation form

I have been in my current position as a Food Service Administrator for four years now and my spouse is my boss (he is the executive director of a nonprofit). Recently I have gone back to school to finish a master’s degree. In order to apply into the program, I need a letter of recommendation from my boss – it is actually a form the school wants filled out. One or two of the professors are aware that he is my boss, but the selection committee is not.

I have been employed here the longest of any job I have had as I got it straight out of college. Do I have him fill it out?

Oooh, that awkward. Is there anyone else at work in a position above you who could fill it out instead? If so, I’d do that. Otherwise … I guess you have to have him do it, but it feels wrong. I think your best bet would be to check with one of the professors who knows the situation and ask her advice.

3. Pulling out of an interview process when my current job really needs me

I recently interviewed for a job that is a step or two lower than I want, but a good starting point for rising up in that particular company. The interview went well and I have advanced to the next round (completing a project and having a second interview immediately following the project’s submission).

However, my company just announced some job cuts that I was not expecting (I did not lose my job, thankfully). My team has been trimmed due to these cuts, and if I left now my boss and team would be screwed since we’re already short. Plus, I’m the only person who knows how to do a lot of my regular duties and it would be a difficult burden for the team to take it over if I left suddenly in the middle of all this. Though the job that I’m interviewing for is pretty much what I want to do, I’m not sure I will take the job if it was offered to me because I now don’t feel comfortable with leaving my current position in light of the recent changes.

I guess what I’m asking is – is it appropriate to pull myself out of the interview process, explaining the changes at my company as the reasoning? I think that once the dust has settled, in another 6 months or so, I’ll feel more comfortable with going elsewhere. I don’t want to burn bridges with either my current boss (by quitting at a terrible time) or with the folks interviewing me (by pulling out of an interview process that is going REALLY well).

You can do that, but are you sure you want to? I’m all for company loyalty if they’ve treated you well, but not at the cost of giving up a different job that you really want. (Although, do you really want it? If it’s lower than where you are now, you might not.)

In any case, if you decide to pull out you can absolutely explain to the other company why. It will reflect well on you in their eyes — certainly not poorly.

Read an update to this letter here.

4. I was fired from a volunteer job

This letter was removed after I received credible reports from others involved in the incident that the facts reported here were incorrect. (An Ask a Manager first!)

5. Working as an actuary

I’m serving in AmeriCorps this year to get “real” job experience, since I have spent nearly all of my adult life in school. After a master’s in what is essentially statistics and elementary programming (theoretical genetics–plenty of math and simulations using large data sets), I feel as if I’d be well suited for a job as an actuary.

The data-crunching is a lot of fun for me, and I love statistics and the idea that I would be professionally encouraged to take tests, advancing my analytical skills for my entire career. I’m confident I can pass the preliminary exam based on probability, and will have the resources to enroll in finance and computer science classes to help me get through the risk-assessment specifics of insurance work.

But I am having a hard time getting in touch with people in the field, or people who have worked with them since I am in a nonprofit environment. Do you or your readers have any input on this career, such as the intellectual ability required, especially since I did not major in economics or finance?

I do not, but perhaps readers do. Readers?