should I take a pay cut to pay for much-needed software for my team?

A reader writes:

I am a member of a two-person team, and we need a new software tool badly. It will save us many hours per release cycle and will improve the quality and usability of our product by a dramatic amount. Another reason my teammate and I are so invested in getting this tool is because it will give us far more opportunity for learning and actual career skill improvement than sticking with our old, antiquated toolset (some of the software is literally a decade old!). The tool was approved at the end of last year, but it has still not been ordered, and I found out today that there might not be room for this tool in our department’s budget after all.

My teammate and I will be making a case for the tool this Friday, with hard information and numbers on how it will save us time and improve our product, but I’ve gotten the impression that it might still not be enough to convince the upper managers.

Would it be out of line to volunteer to take a pay cut for this year to cover the cost of the tool? It would not be an unmanageable or unreasonable amount of money for me (spread out over the rest of the year), and it would be a one-time cost and not a recurring annual cost.

Don’t do this.

First, it’s going to come across as “I know better than you do how the company should be spending its resources and since you won’t make the right call, let me make it easier for you.” It’s also such an unusual thing to offer that it’s going to seem … well, not naive, exactly, but just sort of unaligned with how this stuff generally works.

Second, it might not matter, because salaries and software often come out of completely different budgets.

Third, it could have consequences that you don’t yet realize. You’re thinking of this pay cut as you essentially “paying for” the software yourself, but you’d be setting yourself up for any or all of the following possibilities:
* Your company could agree to the cut for one year and then freeze salaries next year, which could mean your salary wouldn’t be raised back to its current level, despite your agreement.
* If your company provides 401K matching based on your salary, you could receive fewer matching funds this year than you would otherwise earn.
* If you found yourself looking for a job for any reason, and the company insisted on knowing your current salary (a ridiculous but not uncommon practice), you could end up with a lower offer than you would otherwise have received.

Fourth, in addition to all this, they’re simply unlikely to take you up on your offer. When they choose not to order this software, what they’re saying is that they’ve judged other expenses to be higher priorities. Those decisions about priorities won’t change just because you make this offer.

Fifth, if they did take you up on your offer, they’d be revealing that they’re a pretty messed up company, because they should not allow you to personally shoulder an expense like this. Not unless you’re an owner or partner, and possibly not even then.

Ultimately you’ve got to accept that this one just isn’t your call, as much as you’d like to be able to make it happen.

asking to telework when you have your period

A reader writes:

I suffer from extremely painful menstrual cramps. It is worst on the first day of my cycle: abdominal pain, cold sweats, vomiting, leg pain, “the shivers,” etc. I’ve asked my OB/GYN about this, and he cannot seem to find any illness (endometriosis, fibroids, etc.) that could be causing the pain. I have tried a variety of methods: natural remedies, taking medication days before, modifying my diet, birth control, and even prescribed meds to treat the pain, but cannot get any long-term relief.

This is my first full-time job out of graduate school and while in school, I was always able to manage with shifting my schedule when my cycle started. Since I’ve started working, its a little difficult to do so. Last month, I tried to go in and work through the pain, but once my supervisor saw me, she suggested I go home. The pain is unbearable and I normally stay in bed and/or sleep until the late evening to get some relief.

I don’t want to have to continue to take sick days if my cycle begins on a workday. We are allowed to telecommute when needed and I am more than happy to do so when I get sick like this. But I don’t want to seem as if I’m “abusing the system.” I feel it makes me look as if I’m just trying to get out of work and not serious. I really like my position and my supervisor and want to share with her what is going on, but don’t know if that would seem unprofessional and TMI. She is very understanding, but I am not sure how to proceed here. Any advice?

Personally, I’d have a discreet conversation with your manager and say something like, “I want to ask you about something that I feel a little awkward bringing up. I generally have unusually painful cramps on the first day of my menstrual cycle — to the point that my doctor has run numerous tests to see if something is causing the pain. We’re still trying to get it under control, but I wanted to ask you about our telecommuting policy. I’d love to be able to work at home on this day each month so that I can continue to get work done instead of using a sick day, but I don’t want to misuse the policy. Is that something I could reasonably do, or would that be discouraged?”

In other words, just ask.

But I want to acknowledge that this is a much easier conversation because your manager is a woman. And I feel weird about that, because in general your manager’s gender should play no role in how you operate. But the reality is that this is a topic that women generally feel more comfortable bringing up with women than with men, and so because of that, I think this is an easier conversation in your case.

If your manager were a man, I’d still recommend the same conversation — but with whatever wording you’d be more likely to feel comfortable using. And yes, I know that theoretically you should be able to use the exact same wording with a male manager … but there are plenty of women who wouldn’t feel comfortable doing that. In light of that, for a male manager, I might just use a shorter version — “I get horrific cramps one day a month and would like to telecommute that day.” And if you’re wondering why I don’t recommend something just as brief for a woman, it’s because you risk her thinking you’re overreacting to something she knows from personal experience isn’t generally that bad, and thus the additional “it’s genuinely bad” context is potentially useful to provide. And to be clear, I’m not saying any of this is ideal, but I do think it reflects reality for most people, both on your side of this conversation and your manager’s.

What do others think?

if you’re a recent grad, you’re probably making these mistakes in your job search

It can be intimidating to be a new grad just entering the post-college job market for the first time. While most grads mastered the world of classes quite well after 16+ years of them, the norms and conventions of the work world – and of job-searching, in particular – are often foreign.

Here are eight of the most common ways new grads trip themselves up when looking for a job.

1. Not having a realistic idea of what you’re qualified for. Too many college students come out of school without understanding what jobs they have a realistic shot at doing. As a result, they often shoot too high and then get frustrated when they don’t get interviews. Make sure to talk to people in the field you’d like to enter to understand how best to frame your candidacy and what jobs to target first.

2. Including loads of details about your course work on your résumé. Recent grads spend the first half of their résumé on education, notes on coursework and honors. But what you really want to play up is work experience, not details about your courses. A hiring manager is likely to spend only 20 seconds on the initial scan of your résumé and what she needs to see in that time is work experience directly relevant to what she’s hiring for, not a list of college courses you took.

3. Having a lengthy, multi-page résumé. When you’re right out of school, you rarely have enough work experience to justify a résumé longer than one page – and it can make you come across as self-important or unable to edit. Stick to a single page if your experience is limited.

4. Not reaching out to your network. You might feel silly reaching out to your parents’ friend about a job, like they keep pushing you to, but using your network in a job search is both normal and often extraordinarily helpful. People in your network can connect you with jobs, refer you to hiring managers and give you valuable information about your field. If you ignore them because you’re shy or not convinced it will absolutely work, you’ll forfeit a tool that can be one of the most helpful in a job search.

5. Searching for your dream job. You’re unlikely to be qualified for your dream job straight out of school, and holding out for one will make you lose out on other opportunities. More importantly, you really can’t know whether something is a dream job or not until you’re working there. While you might think that you might love doing that work for that company, it might turn out that the boss is a nightmare, or your co-workers are horrible, or the company makes you bring in a doctor’s note every time you have a cold, or your work load is so unreasonably high that you end up having panic attacks every morning. It’s smarter to look for a job you can do well and with which you’ll be reasonably happy.

6. Not helping employers understand how your experience relates to their needs. New grads often come out of school with a strong package of skills but not much understanding of how to frame those qualifications in terms that will resonate with employers. The language and framework that worked in academia may not work with employers, so this piece of the transition from campus to work can be a hard one.

7. Being overly formal. Some new grads expect the work world to be more formal than it often is, and this culture disconnect can show in everything from overly stiff cover letters, to unnecessarily formal emails to co-workers, to feeling awkward calling their much older boss by a first name. They can make a better impression by realizing that employers and co-workers – even if many decades older – are regular people just like they are and generally appreciate being treated that way. On the other hand…

8. Not being formal enough. While new grads shouldn’t be excessively formal, they shouldn’t go to the other extreme either. Most offices expect a certain degree of decorum: no slang or text-speak when talking with your boss or a client, no bare feet in meetings, and no treating the receptionist like you just met her in a bar, among other things.

wee answer Wednesday — 7 short answers to 7 short questions

It’s wee answer Wednesday — seven short answers to seven short questions. Here we go…

1. Can my friend avoid being laid off?

My best friend is three months into her first full-time job post-college. It’s not in her field, but she was generally happy with having a job, her coworkers, etc. Her boss just announced that they will be laying off one staff member who will be chosen from a group of three workers doing generally the same thing (my friend is in this group).

The announcement of who it is will be coming in two weeks because it’s corporate’s decision. Naturally, the fear is that she will be the one laid off because she’s the newest worker. Is there anything she can do in the next two weeks to increase her chances of staying? Or is this basically a done deal?

There’s probably not much she can do in the next two weeks. The decision will probably be made either on seniority or merit. She obviously can’t change her seniority, and if it’s decided on merit, there’s not much she can do to change whatever impression she’s already made in that regard, good or bad. What she should do, however, is (a) start job-searching; if she’s laid off, she’ll be glad she had the head start, and if she’s not, she can short-circuit the search at that point, and (b) be prepared to ask for severance if she’s the one who’s let go. To strengthen her case there, she might point out that she turned down other jobs to take this one, if in fact she did; that argument and similar ones can sometimes help.

2. Company doesn’t offer benefits until after six months of employment

I have been offered a job which does not offer benefits (health insurance, paid time off, sick leave, etc.) for the first 6 months. It is a full-time permanent position. Employees do accrue paid time off during that six months but are not paid for any time off.

I have never experienced this before. To me, the company is saying, “We don’t expect our employees to stay here more than six months so we aren’t going to provide them with benefits,” and either people are leaving before six months or getting fired before six months, neither of which is good. What do you think of it?

Some people do leave or get fired before six months in pretty much every company. It’s possible that it’s happening here more than most, but it’s more likely that they simply have a bad insurance policy. I don’t take issue with their paid leave policy — it’s not uncommon to allow leave to accrue but say that you can’t use it in your first six months. It is, however, a bad policy not to offer insurance until six months, because it means that their employees will either have to pay to use COBRA if they had a COBRA-eligible job previously (which doesn’t account for everyone, and COBRA premiums are often very high) or that they’ll be uninsured. So that part of the policy sucks.

3. My manager asked for volunteers to do yard work at our director’s house

One of my managers asked, mostly via email to everyone, for volunteers to do yard work for our director. While this was voluntary and meant as a nice gesture to a well-respected director, it didn’t seem right to me. I voiced my opinion and now my hours have been halved. My concerns included the question of what if someone gets hurt, whether participants would later receive preferential treatment, and whether human resources would condone this.

You were right to speak up, because it’s inappropriate to ask employees to do yard work for a manager. They were wrong to cut your hours as a result. Ethically wrong, that is, and managerially wrong — legally, it’s their right to do that, but it’s a ridiculous response. If you have a good HR department, you might consider raising this to them.

4. Is it useful to mention being in the advanced stages of interviewing with other companies?

I have been working at a very idiosyncratic fixed-term contract job. I’m not paid by the company, but by a third party. It’s impossible for me to keep on working there. I have around $65,000 student loan debt, and I make almost nothing. I am granted the favor of being allowed to list a staff title (low ranking, but at least not “intern”) on my resume and on the company’s website. But it’s not a very respectable industry and has very poor exit options.

After a very, very long period of not having any leads for good, full-time jobs with decent potential for career growth, I’ve gotten a little lucky recently. I got 3 rounds with a company in my desired field, for an entry-level position. But I also am in the second round with a different company in my field, and also a second round with a company in a different, less desired field, but for a higher position.

At this point, my priority is getting any decent offer. Once I have a real job in a decent industry, I will be able to build on that and move up either there or through networking. My question is: In lieu of an offer, is there a way to leverage late stage interviews (being very deep in the interview process) with one company for another? The first company actually told me two times, in my last interview, that I should tell them right away if I had any other offers, and that could speed their decision time up in giving me an offer. It’s been a little over one week now since my final interview there. They told me they’d take a few weeks. I originally planned to follow up in two weeks.

Hearing that you have an offer from somewhere else isn’t likely to push them into making you an offer if they otherwise never would have. All it can do is speed up their decision making process — which could mean a faster “no,” not just a faster “yes.” And you definitely don’t want to bluff and say you have an offer when you don’t, because you risk hearing, “We won’t be making decisions for a while, so you should take it” and then being removed from their process.

But you’re not asking about offers; you’re asking about mentioning that you’re in advanced stages of interviewing with other companies. That isn’t really useful, because employers know all too well that hiring takes time, and you could reach a late stage with a company, only to have it take weeks (or longer) before offers are made.

5. Explaining a job gap due to a mental health issue

Until recently I held a position that I loved in the entertainment industry. However, I am in my mid-twenties, the time of onset for many major mental illnesses, and I learned I am bipolar when I had my first major manic episode. This necessitated my leaving work to get help, and while they loved me and would have held the job if possible (my boss told me this), it is obviously a fast paced industry, and taking two months off isn’t feasible.

Now that I am properly medicated and looking for work again, what do I say when asked why I left my last job? I am confident I can count on good references from my previous job, but how do I explain leaving? I don’t want to vaguely reference a medical crisis that will make them worry about my reliability, but the truth is obviously even worse! Any thoughts would be appreciated.

“I had a health issue that has since been resolved.” It’s accurate and it doesn’t reveal any more than you need to.

6. How can I find out what happened with the job I was interviewing for?

After three months of interviewing with a hedge fund for a senior role, I progressed as far as being told that we would be getting contracts shortly. Three weeks went by and nothing. I emailed and called and am getting no response. I have to assume they changed their mind, but I have never encountered this total lack of professionalism. Any suggestions on how I can find out what happened?

You might not be able to. You’ve attempted to contact them multiple times and they’re not responding. At this point, all you can do is chalk it up to rudeness on their side and move on — which will serve you far better than spending any energy trying to figure out what happened anyway. (Because really, it doesn’t matter what happened, whether it was a better candidate coming along, the position being put on hold, hiring being frozen, doubts about your fit for the role, or whatever. Sure, it would be nice to know, but since they’re being rudely unresponsive, just move on.)

7. My company won’t compensate me for the level of work I’m performing

I am in a situation where I have been in my current job for over 2 years, have been doing excellent work for those two years, but not getting the pay nor the title associated with that level of performance. My performance reviews have been Exceeds Expectations during this time, and the feedback I get is that I am performing at a level far beyond my experience. Not only that, over the last year, my company assigned me to the most critical product launch in the last 10 years, one that saves the company if it is successful, and dooms it if not. (It has been successful and is nearly fully launched.)

My dilemma is this: I am much younger than the typical person in this role, yet I am performing at that much more experienced level and I think I should get compensated for it. The excuse from my management is that I do not meet the on-paper experience requirements for them to place me at the organizational level I think I deserve, and that HR will fight it to the death. My company’s policies/philosophy for this type of thing makes it much more attractive to leave the company for 1-3 years and come back for substantially higher salary and organizational level.

How hard should I push my manager/management, or should I begin to look elsewhere? I do not wish to leave the company, and I very much like the people I work for. My gut feeling is that they do not currently see me as someone at risk to leave, so they are not thinking about this in the same light I am. That said, I am aware that most of the large corporate mindset in America these days is that everyone and anyone is replaceable and that they won’t “use their chips” to “go to bat” for you. I have a mid-year performance evaluation coming up in about a week, and I plan to discuss this then. What should I do?

Start looking for another job. You answered your own question here: “My company’s policies/philosophy for this type of thing makes it much more attractive to leave the company for 1-3 years and come back for substantially higher salary and organizational level.”

You can certainly tell your manager that you’re concerned that the company’s policy encourage you to leave in order to be appropriately compensated, and that you’d like to stay but you do want to be paid fairly … but that’s about all you can do. If you want more money and they won’t give it to you, you’ll need to go somewhere else to get it.

how can I get a client to pay me on time?

A reader writes:

My boss and I offer English tutoring services to international students who are learning English as a second language at school. Can you please advise me on how to get my new customer (well, I am not sure if she is considered new-new, as I have been working with her for the past 1.5 months already) to pay us on time?

There is a contract that states payment is due every 8 lessons given, but we have not been paid.

I texted and even called her on her mobile, but to no success. I even reminded her myself about her pending payment when she came over to our office for a meeting yesterday and she agreed that she would pay up by the end of the working day.

Honestly, I can see this business relationship working out between us, but I really need her to take us seriously and pay on time — and to understand that it’s not okay to pay one day, if not one week, later, despite reassuring my boss and I that they would have the payment in by a designated time, only to be met with an empty promise on their end.

Well, if you want her to take your payment terms seriously, you need to take them seriously yourself and convey that in how you handle this.

First, don’t text about this. Texting is an informal method of communication; it’s not appropriate to use for something important. You should email or call.

Second, send her a clear and to-the-point email with an invoice attached. Say something like this: “A second copy of your invoice for the last X sessions is attached. As you know, our contract requires payment to be submitted after each 8 lessons. This invoice is now X days overdue. When we spoke about this last week, you said you would submit payment within a day, but we’ve not yet received it.”

That’s step one. If you don’t receive prompt payment, you move to step two — which is to stop providing her with work until you’ve received payment for the work you’ve already done.

When someone shows you by their actions that they don’t take contractual payment terms seriously, you need to show them that you do — and that you expect them too also. Otherwise, you’re telling her that she doesn’t need to — and that’s how people find themselves in situations where they’ve done hours/days/weeks/months of work that they never end up getting paid for, or that they need to spend months chasing down. Set the boundaries now, and enforce them.

my dad is pushing me to handle a firing differently than I want to

A reader writes:

I’d been having problems at work. It was a job I loved at first, but then things changed so much it no longer felt like the job I’d accepted. I’d come to resent my micromanaging boss and my coworkers were driving me nuts, but I tried to stick it out and put on a happy face until I could get a new job. But my resentment showed through and my manager put me on a performance plan to improve my attitude, although when I raised concerns about my job being in jeopardy, he assured me I wasn’t getting fired and I had a month to turn things around.

Nope. Two weeks into the performance plan, I got terminated. Part of me was relieved, even though I also feel horribly ashamed for screwing up so badly. But when I told my dad, he was pissed at the company. For one thing, he felt I should have been given a severance package and I should be paid a month’s worth of wages (he’s an employer too, and hiring and firing is part of his job). He also feels that my boss lied about my not being about to be fired, which was not okay, and that it was low of them to make me sign something but not give me a copy. But I don’t think I’m entitled to any of this — and I don’t want to act like a stereotypical Millenial and demand things I don’t deserve.

I know better than to call them and fight this. It’s not going to do anything, it’ll only make me look bad, and despite having a degree in politial science I’m actually not a fan of gaming a system for financial gain. But he’ll call me a quitter if I don’t at least try. What should I tell him?

Tell him that you’re an adult now and that while you appreciate his input, you’d like him to trust that you know the situation best and that you’re going to make your own decisions about how to handle it, and that you plan to move on and focus on what’s next. If he calls you a quitter, say, “I’m sorry you feel that way.”

But for your own background, here are some thoughts on your situation, in no particular order:

Regarding severance, some companies give it and some don’t. You can’t make them do it, especially if you don’t have any leverage that would make them want to — i.e., if they were concerned you were thinking of suing for a legitimate issue, such as harassment or discrimination, they’d have an incentive to give you severance in exchange for you signing a release of claims. But you acknowledge that you were clearly fired for performance, so I don’t see a justification for pushing for severance here unless there are relevant details not in your letter.

As for telling you that you had a month to improve before getting fired, but then firing you after two weeks — I don’t know the specifics of what happened, but if your performance wasn’t showing improvement during those two weeks, or was even getting worse, or if there was a major mistake made during that time, there are certainly cases where it would have been legitimate for them to short-circuit the improvement plan and end things early.

And last thing: Even though it might have felt differently in the moment, it’s important to remember that no one can “make you” sign something. You could have refused, or you could have insisted on a copy before signing. That’s not always something you realize when you’re new to the work world, but it’s something to remember for the future — and it’s something you might point out to your father if he continues raising this.

More importantly, though, your dad doesn’t know all the details, and he seems to be judging this situation as your dad not as an employer — which is natural, but you need to be firm about being an adult and handling this yourself.

my manager wants me to take more responsibility for my mistakes

A reader asks:

My manager recently told me that she doesn’t like the way I handle mistakes. I do make mistakes, and they’re not always trivial ones, but I usually try to fix them and move on. Apparently since I don’t inform her when this happens, it’s coming across to her as me not taking responsibility or seeming “cavalier” about my work quality. But I don’t understand what she’s looking for. Can you help?

Well, first, you need to know what’s going on in your manager’s head when she learns that you’ve made a mistake. Beyond thinking about the repercussions of the mistake itself, she’s worrying about what it means for the larger picture: Did the mistake happen because of sloppy work habits or was this one isolated incident? Is there a fundamental problem with your systems or approach to the work? Do you realize that this is a big deal, or are you shrugging it off and thus likely to let something similar happen in the future?

Once you understand this, the formula for handling a mistake well becomes more intuitive: Tell your boss what happened, take responsibility for it, and tell her how you’ll ensure it doesn’t happen again.

If you don’t do each of those steps, you leave your boss wondering if she can trust that similar mistakes won’t happen again.

After all, if you don’t tell her what happened, or if you put it off out of fear of the conversation, you’re sending the message that you value your own comfort over the needs of the work.

Taking responsibility means using words like: “I really messed this up. I’m sorry.” (In fact, the more concerned you seem, the less likely she is to feel she needs to impress the severity on you. If you proactively show that you get it, there’s no need for her to underscore it.) But if you instead act like it wasn’t a big deal or get defensive about it, you can actually compound the damage: Your boss will be far more alarmed that you don’t really care that you made a mistake than she will be by the mistake itself. Rather than making the mistake less noticeable, what will really stand out is that you’re not taking responsibility for it.

The third step – telling your boss how it happened and how you plan to ensure it doesn’t happen again – isn’t so much that she wants to know as it is that she wants to know that you know. And that’s because if you don’t understand how it happened, you’re not well equipped to keep it from happening again.

You’re going to make mistakes from time to time, and any halfway sane boss knows that. As long as your mistakes remain occasional and not constant, how you handle them will be what matters most.

tiny answer Tuesday — 7 short answers to 7 short questions

It’s tiny answer Tuesday — seven short answers to seven short questions. Here we go…

1. I was interviewing for a job when suddenly they started talking about an internship instead

I am going in for a third (and final) interview for a customer service position at a large corporation and have several years of experience in the field. This position would have significantly better benefits and pay as outlined in my initial interview (and posted position). I just received an email stating that my third interview is for a customer service “intern.” I never applied for this, never discussed it, and frankly have no interest. As an intern there are no benefits, and the pay is 40% less than discussed. What are my options, and how are they getting away with this assumption that intern is an acceptable level for someone more qualified?

Well, they’re not “getting away” with anything (it takes two to interview and put someone in a job, you know; it’s not something they can “do to you”), but more importantly, you haven’t spoken up about it! For all you know, it could be a mistake or miscommunication — why didn’t you immediately write back and say, “Your email says that this is for an internship, rather than the staff position we’ve been discussing. Can you please clarify?” If they respond that they think you’d be a better candidate for the internship, then you can let them know that that’s not a path you’re interested in.

2. Asking for an informational interview with a related office

I’m a new paralegal with ABA certification and I’m interning at the county trial court (mostly doing administrative work for a judge’s court clerk). I’m wondering about the best way to request an informational interview with the prosecutor’s office (in the same building) and the public defender’s office (down the street). I’d like to introduce myself and get my resume into the hands of the hiring managers.

It’s a plus that I’m interning because I see assistant prosecutors and public defenders daily in court, and a referral from a judge would go a long way. But I’m not sure about the initial contact with these offices. Should I call, email, mail, or walk my resume in? I do have a contact who works at the prosecutor’s office, but she is in a very junior position and extremely flaky (to be generous). Not sure whether it’s even a plus to mention a connection to her.

Email. Always, always email unless your contact there specifically instructs you to do otherwise. Email allows them to respond when it’s convenient for them (unlike calling or showing up in person), and it allows them to review your materials before doing so.

However, are you sure what you want is an informational interview? Those are not to get jobs; those are to learn about a field. If you ask for one and it turns out you’re hoping they’ll think about hiring you, they’ll (a) not agree to the meeting if they figure it out beforehand, or (b) be really irritated if they figure it out afterwards. If what you want is a job interview, that’s what you need to say.

3. Did my company secretly have this recruiter call me?

I work for a large corporation and was recently told by my manager that I could be promoted this year pending the HR process. About four weeks after that conversation, I got a call from a recruiter saying they saw my profile on Linkedin and had a position I might be interested in.

My company is experiencing a lot of turnover lately. Is it possible HR had this recruiter call me? This recruiter was working very hard to pull information out of me and I got nervous and when that person asked for me to send a resume, I said I would (even though I had no intentions of doing so; I just wanted to end the call). Instead I sent the recruiter an email later that night saying I am happy with my current employer and am not interested in another job.

I mean, it’s possible that HR had a recruiter call you, but it’s very, very unlikely. Close to paranoid levels of unlikely. That’s not how these things normally work. And when a recruiter calls, they normally do try to pull a lot of information out of you, so that isn’t a signal of anything nefarious.

4. Can my resume be as short as half a page?

I’m an average college student. I’ve had a couple internships, and am active in few campus organizations. I strive to keep my resume concise and objective, which makes it roughly half of a page. Is there anything wrong with that? I’m not sure. My college’s career center said yes, and constructed a version that “solved” the problem by being verbose. They also had me include work experience from high school. Perhaps having a half ‘o’ page resumé is an issue, but there’s a better way to fix it.

Yeah, you really want to have enough to say about your qualifications that it fills a page — otherwise, you’re basically conceding that you have so few qualifications that no reasonable employer should consider hiring you … which is the opposite of the normal goal of a resume. That doesn’t mean you should be superfluously wordy, but with a couple of internships and the high school jobs (assuming they were within the last 5-ish years), you should be able to fill a full page if you think about what you did in those jobs.

5. Can I decline an exit interview?

I’m resigning as soon as I get a written offer for another position and formally accept. But I always dread exit interviews. I’m not going to say anything negative because I don’t want to risk hurting a future reference from my current managers, so I’m just going to be super positive and say how great everything is at my current job. There’s nothing horrible going on like harassment or anything that I would feel obligated to report, but there is plenty that needs to be addressed and those things certainly are the reason I’m leaving. With this in mind, how would it be viewed by HR if I just politely declined the exit interview? If it matters, this is a Fortune 500 company, I have a professional position and have been there about two years.

I would much, much rather you simply decline the exit interview than be falsely positive in it. If it’s a form to fill out, just don’t fill it out. If it’s an actual meeting and HR makes it hard for you to avoid it, it would be better to simply be carefully neutral than to take positivity that you don’t feel. But try to just avoid it if you can — say you have a ton to do before you leave or something like that.

6. Online application systems that won’t accept design portfolios

I’m a designer, so I often check design-specific job boards for postings. As expected, to apply for a design position, these postings always ask you submit your resume and portfolio/samples. But large corporations usually don’t give out email addresses; they instead direct you to their career center website. The problem I’m running into is these are never set up to accept portfolios. The past three jobs I’ve applied to… One allowed you to upload a max of 500KB, which is pretty much my resume and nothing else, and my resume is nothing fancy. One just wouldn’t upload my portfolio, no error message, no size limit given (it was 5MB, which I consider reasonable); no matter how many times I hit upload, nothing happened. And one just didn’t even give me the option; there was space to cut and paste my resume and that’s it, no option to upload anything.

So given these difficulties, I’ve just been putting a link to my online portfolio in my cover letter and resume. Short of maybe stalking people on LinkedIn to get a contact, which seems insane, I can’t think of another way to get my work in front of them. But the posting specifically asks to send work samples (and then provides no way of doing so!), and I hate feeling like I’m wasting my time creating targeted resumes, cover letters, and portfolios that they will never see because of there system. Is this reasonable to expect them to click on the link I send? Or am I just wasting my time even applying?

Your solution of including a link to your portfolio in your cover letter and in your resume is exactly right. It’s perfectly reasonable to expect that if your cover letter and resume interest them, they’ll follow the link to see your work. Keep doing that, and don’t stress about it.

7. Should I keep following up for feedback from the job that rejected me?

I interviewed for a job, and didn’t get it. They asked me to ring them, which I did, where they then said I didn’t get it, and asked if I had any questions for them. Note that when they told me, it was exactly when they promised they’d get back to everyone.

I asked for feedback, and the manager said she’d get back to me in the next few days. When a week had elapsed with no response, I sent an email to follow up, saying I was fine with written feedback if she was too busy to phone. She responded by email, saying, “No it’ll be fine, ring me tomorrow.” I did, and she said she was snowed under and could she ring me back in 45 minutes. That never happened, and that was last Friday. Fridays and Mondays are generally busy, so I didn’t bother following up yesterday. Now that it’s Tuesday, should I, or move on? Have I persisted enough in getting feedback?

Yes, move on. You’ve requested her feedback three times now — and while she’s actively encouraged you to do that, if she really was motivated to give you feedback, she would have done it by now.

6 things impacting your job performance – that you control

Plenty of things impact your work performance that you can’t control: You might have an unreasonably high workload and not enough time to spend on some items, or a boss who gives you unclear or conflicting instructions, or coworkers whose work you can’t depend on. But lots of things impact your work performance that you can control, as well – and too often, people struggling at work neglect to consider these.

Here are six of the most common ways you might be holding yourself back at work without realizing it.

1. Distractions – electronic and otherwise. If you leave Facebook open throughout the day, instant-message with friends or coworkers while you work, and/or make time to chat with anyone you spot walking by your desk, you’re almost certainly impacting your productivity. While multi-tasking has become fashionable in recent years, the reality is that some types of work require deeper focus than these kinds of distractions allow – and even if your work doesn’t require much focus, constantly stopping to type another instant message to your friend or check out a YouTube video someone just emailed you is going to impact how much you get done in any give day.

2. Sleep. If you’re up past midnight and need to be at work at 8 a.m., chances are good that you’re not getting enough sleep. Coffee might mask the immediate symptoms, but fatigue can impact how well you perform on the job – as well as how you deal with workplaces stresses. If your energy is lagging or you feel like your “immunity” to workplace frustrations is low, take a look at whether you’re showing up for work well-rested most days.

3. Complaining. It can be tempting to vent about everything that frustrates you about your boss, your company, and your coworkers, but complaining has a way of making unhappiness worse. Frequently venting can actually give you a more negative outlook on your office and your job (and can have the same impact on those around you, too). If you’re guilty of regular complaining, try instituting a no-complaints rule for yourself for two weeks and see if you feel any different at the end of it.

4. Who you associate yourself with at work. You’re likely to pick up the viewpoints and work habits of the people who you’re closest to at work. If you align yourself with people who do the bare minimum (or less), resent your managers, or have a complaint about everything (see #3 above!), you’re likely to pick up those habits yourself. On the other hand, if you build relationships with people whose work you respect and whose contributions you admire, you might find yourself picking up the habits that have helped them be successful.

5. Your approach to your work. Are you just trying to get your work completed or are you truly taking ownership of your realm and thinking about better ways to get results? If you see your job as simply executing a list of task that someone else assigns, you might never be given opportunities to grow beyond that. But if you feel true ownership for your piece of the company – no matter how small it might be relative to others’ – and you care about finding ways to do your job better, it will usually show in your performance. And even if your current employer isn’t smart enough to reward you for it, this is how you build a reputation that will eventually help you land better and better opportunities.

6. Your ability to recognize what you do and don’t control. Most people have some frustrations with their boss, even if that boss is a good manager. But a key to staying happy (and sane) in that relationship is to get clear in your own mind about what you can and can’t control, and to focus on making the pieces you can control go as smoothly as possible. Rather than stewing over an aspect of your boss that you can’t change (like the fact that she’s always late for meetings or she isn’t responsive to email), it’s far more productive to understand that her working style may not change and to find ways to work effectively within that reality.

I originally published this at U.S. News & World Report.