Ask a Manager

It’s short answer Saturday — seven short answers to seven short questions. Here we go…

1. Giving employees differently sized gift for the same milestone

We have two employees who have both been in our company for 20 years: one is an Operations Manager and one is an Admin Assistant. We would like to recognize both of them for their service at an upcoming dinner but would really like to give the Operations guy a more elaborate multi-day ski trip (including a flight and accomodations in another province) and something less expensive for the Admin person (a weekend getaway at nice hotel within driving distance). This is because the Operations Manager holds much more responsibility, works many long hours, is in charge of crews of up to 30 people, and is more vital to the company. The Admin Assistant, while performing a necessary role, does not manage people, scales back to part-time hours during our slow season, and is not in a “high-responsibility” position.

Is it reasonable to give different sized gifts for the same milestone and if so, what is a tactful way to present them without offending the Admin Assistant?

I wouldn’t. You’ll essentially be saying, “Joe’s service was more valuable than Jane’s” — which it very well may have been, but it’s not especially kind to announce it like that, and not especially wise when you’re trying to show appreciation for Jane. The risk of Jane feeling slighted is just too high.

If you absolutely must give different sized gifts, definitely don’t do it at the dinner; do it privately. But even then, I’d worry that Jane will find out and feel that you’ve just told her that she’s B-list to Joe’s A-list … which isn’t what you want to convey when you’re trying to do something nice for someone.

2. Boss doesn’t like telecommuting

I am out on maternity leave and will be returning to work next month. Two years ago, another coworker had a baby and my boss allows her to work two days at home and two days in the office. I thought that I would also be allowed to do a similar arrangement (I have been there almost 9 years and she has been there 5), but when I asked he didn’t say yes or no; his response was, “I don’t like Sarah working from home” (yet he continues to let her to do so). What are your thoughts on this?

It’s not unusual that when a manager isn’t thrilled with how Person A’s telecommuting arrangement has gone or is going, they’re hesitant to expand the practice. I’d talk to your boss about his concerns so that you can come up with a proposal that addresses them. (It’s hard to give specific advice without hearing what he doesn’t like about the current arrangement, and it’s also hard for you to respond to him, so find that out first.)

3. Prospective employer told my boss someone at our company is job searching

I recently contacted another employer inquiring about a similar position to the one I’m currently working. I work in marketing and the employer who I was inquiring with harassed me because I would not accept a commission-only position. After an awkward conversation, I declined the job. The next day I was informed by my upset manager that someone had informed the owners and him that an employee from my company (me) had inquired about a job there. I and all my coworkers were then harassed by my manager trying to find out who was on the job hunt. When questioned, I lied and told him it wasn’t me. I feel like my current job is now in jeopardy because I looked for another job. What should I do?

Wow, that employer who contacted your manager was a real jerk. And so is your boss, for that matter. What the hell?

In any case, it doesn’t sound like your manager knows which of you was looking, so I don’t think you need to do anything for now — just move on and hope he drops it.

4. Managing workers fearful of layoffs

My company announced this week that a very large number of historically on-shore roles would be outsourced over the next year or so. A small number of people in this role will get to stay, but uncertainty around job security is obviously running high. While my role is not impacted (yet), I manage some who are. Looking for advice from you and/or your readers on what to say to upset workers fearful of their impending layoff (with unfortunately, a rather vague timeline).

There’s not much you can say that is going to be reassuring in this situation. In fact, I’d argue that you shouldn’t be trying to be reassuring, because you don’t want to lull people into not job-searching when they should be. What you can do, however, is to offer your help to them in finding other roles, offer to be a reference, etc. Ideally, you’d also be able to arm them with a timeline for when information should be available and info about how the layoff decisions will be made, but it sounds like you may not have that.

5. Is my manager allowed to yell at me in front of others?

I’m trying to find out some of my rights at my job. Is my manager allowed to yell and curse at me in front of customers? Is she allowed to discuss my write-ups with other employees who are servers like me? Or send out a picture to all of the staff of it before I have even been shown it? And is she allowed to discuss and plot ways to fire me with other employees and in front of customers?

Yes, she’s legally allowed to do all that, but it’s ridiculous that she is. She sent out a picture of your write-up to other staff members? She sounds deranged. I’d start job-searching, since this isn’t someone you want to work for.

6. Interviewing with someone who would be junior to you if you get the job

I was wondering if you had any tips or advice for interviewing with someone who would be your junior, should you land and accept the job. I have an interview later this week, and I’ll be interviewing with the person who would be my department head, a person who will be slightly above me, and someone who would be my junior and who I would be expected to mentor on occasion. I’m thrilled to be meeting the team I’d be working with, but I’ve never interviewed with someone who would potentially be below me on the food chain before. I assume that the same basic tenets apply, but are there any pitfalls or common mistakes I should watch out for?

Express a sincere interest in what they think is needed in the position, and treat them the exact same way you treat the other interviewers — don’t be condescending or signal that you think their opinion is less important than the others’. Good luck!

7. Writing a resume when you’ve worked for one employer for 25 years

How do I write a resume when I have been at the same company for over 25 years? I have held various levels of employment in the same department during that time, moving up from copywriter to senior print production director in a national advertising agency. I want to relocate to a new town and, while I technically could commute to my present job, I don’t really want to do that. I would like to find another job in the new town.

The key thing is to show how you’ve grown and taken on new responsibilities at the company — ideally you can show that you haven’t been doing the same job for 25 years, but rather than you’ve done multiple jobs in those 25 years, just all at the same company. Additionally, because one concern about people who have been at the same company for such a long time is about how well they’ll be able to adapt to new environments, try to find ways to demonstrate that you’ve been exposed to a range of practices and environments and done well in that context.

It’s fast answer Friday — seven short answers to seven short questions. Here we go…

1. Best time to start a new job

I am currently interviewing but have a question around start date. Do you think mid-December is a good time to start a new job? Any implications (financial, bonus, etc.?)

It really depends. At some companies, most people would be out and it might be hard to get the training you need; at others, it would be a good time to start because things would be quiet and you’d have time to acclimate. I’d just ask the employer if you get an offer; they probably have their own ideas about this. As for bonuses, you’re not likely to be eligible for a bonus right after you start so I wouldn’t take that into account.

2. Interviewer wouldn’t let me speak

A recruiter contacted me last Thursday, and by the end of the day, I had a phone interview with the manager of the department I’d be working in set up for Tuesday afternoon. I did not formally apply for the position, as I have worked a bit with this company as a client before and have many contacts from within.

The interview was NOT formal at all. I rehearsed and prepared all weekend for this—it’s my dream job. The manager only asked one brief question about my experience, and the rest of the 2-hour long interview, we just talked. Well… SHE talked about 90% of the time. She told me details about the position, which was great, but she also told me some travel stories and her family structure. I really never had much of a chance to sell myself because I surely wasn’t going to interrupt her. We had good “conversation,” I guess … I interjected a “mmhmmm” and “exactly” in there where I could. Towards the end, I said, “I feel bad because I really haven’t told you a lot about myself. Do you have any specific questions you’d like to ask? I’d be happy to elaborate on my experience and my abilities.” She said no and that her style is just to talk because you can find out a lot about a candidate just by talking. Well… that’s great… except she barely let me talk at all and would interrupt me when I would try to speak. At the end, I told her I’d love the opportunity to meet her in person, and she acted very weird. We had been getting along well throughout the interview but didn’t seem interested at all to set up a face-to-face meeting. Is this a bad sign?

It’s a bad sign about her as a manager, yes. This is no way to conduct an interview or figure out whether to hire someone, and the fact that she operates like this bodes very badly for what it would be like to work with her. This isn’t your dream job, not if she’s running things.

3. Gifting a boss when you leave

You’ve mentioned many times on your blog how gifts should always go from a boss to their employees, and not the other way around. I’m just wondering if it’s ever not weird to give a gift to your boss. I’m in my final days at the company I’ve been working at since August. It’s just a co-op work term, and I’m going back to school in the new year. The last co-op student (who trained me during her final week) gave our boss a bottle of wine on her last day. I feel like I should give my boss a present on my last day as well. I was thinking of just getting a little Christmas ornament (maybe she could put it on the tree we have in the office, I don’t know) with a note saying something along the lines of “thanks for the great work term, merry Christmas!”

There are only 6 people, including my boss, that work at this company and we all work within a few feet of each other if that makes any difference.

Don’t get her a gift. Give her a note about what you’ve learned from her in your time there, what you admire about her, whatever you can say genuinely. That’s a thousand times more meaningful than any gift you could give a boss, with the added bonus of having zero chance of making her feel odd about accepting a gift from an employee. Believe me, she’d much rather have the note than the Christmas ornament — wouldn’t you?

4. We get docked vacation time for unapproved trips to the bathroom

This may fall under the “Is it legal?” category, but here goes: The managers at my company, a call center, have decided the workers are taking too many unscheduled breaks. They’ve stated that if everyone was away from their desk 10 minutes a day, 5 days a week, etc… That it is costing them too much money, so instead, if we take unauthorized breaks for whatever reason (getting a glass of water, stretching your legs, using the bathroom, possibly smoking, or taking a personal call) the time is docked from our accrued vacation time. Now, can they do that? Is it legal? Is it smart? Can I really be punished for using the bathroom outside of my break times?!

I’m so not surprised that you work in a call center, because this kind of silliness is commonplace there.

Anyway, it’s probably legal, because they’re not required to give you any vacation time at all so they can deduct from it from whatever reasons they want. There might be OSHA issues if it could shown that they’re penalizing people for taking necessary bathroom breaks, but my reading of OSHA on this is unclear. But regardless, it’s incredibly stupid to signal to your employees that you don’t want them to use the bathroom and that you think 10 minutes a day away from their desks is unsupportable. This is one of the many reasons why call centers have such high turnover.

5. Recruiter invited me to lunch to give me feedback

I recently received an email informing me that the hiring manager for a position I’d been waiting to hear back about had decided not to hire me. I responded by thanking both the recruiter and her assistant (who sent the rejection email) for their kindness during the interview process and I ended the email by requesting interview feedback. The recruiter’s assistant quickly replied to my email and stated that I was the candidate of choice for both she and the senior recruiter. In the email, she shared that she was disappointed that the hiring manager didn’t select me and that she would like to provide me with feedback over lunch.

Is this out of the ordinary and should I accept her invitation? It seems I’ll have to if I want the feedback. Also, should I ask her if it’d be inappropriate for me to email a thank you note to the hiring manager?

You don’t need to ask her if it’s inappropriate to thank the hiring manager; you can go ahead and do that.

As for the lunch meeting, if you want the feedback and/or to build your relationship with her, accept her invitation. It’s certainly not common, but who knows what insight she might want to give you. (On the other hand, if you go to lunch and you get vague feedback or feedback that could have been delivered in five minutes on the phone, I’d be annoyed. But there’s no way to know unless you go.)

I’m assuming, by the way, that you’re not getting “date” vibes from this invitation. If you are, that’s a whole different issue.

6. Manager fired me after a string of scheduling errors

I was hired as a floater for a medical lab in May. My supervisor’s way of scheduling and communicating was through text message. The problem is, she often made mistakes with my schedule sending me either to the wrong location on the wrong day or at the wrong time. I complained about it but nothing was done the mistakes kept happening. She made the mistake once again the week of Thanksgiving, I drove 45 minutes to a location just to see the person I was covering was there. I complained again to human resources then I later got a text from my supervisor apologizing and telling me to go back to that location the next day. I did not go because I was originally off that day and already made plans.

When I went back to work after the holiday, my supervisor had someone else at the location. I went to human resources, spoke to them, and they put my supervisor on speakerphone. I explained to her my frustrations with her constant mistakes. She was very defensive and nasty and terminated me. I filed for unemployment but they said in a letter I may have been separated from my job due to misconduct. A friend of mine said that was wrongful termination and I should file a complaint. Is this true?

It sounds like they fired you for not showing up the next day, when you were told to, and I assume that’s why your unemployment was denied. Your manager sounds like a mess, but I don’t see anything here that’s illegal. “Wrongful termination” doesn’t mean that you were fired for an unfair reason; it means that you were fired for an illegal reason — that you were fired in violation of some legal right that you hold. For instance, wrongful termination would include being fired because of your membership in a legally protected class (race, sex, religion, etc.), or because you complained about harassment or some other legally protected conduct, or because you refused to perform an illegal act. None of that was the case here, so I don’t see a legal issue, just an incompetence issue with your manager.

(In general, though, it’s a safe bet that if you simply don’t show up on a day you’re told to come to work, bad things may happen — no matter how justified you might feel.)

7. Possible instability in a prospective company

I’m currently employed, but looking to transition and it has taken a long time (3+ years). I think part of my problem is that I’ve spent my entire career working for the government and the corporate world doesn’t seem to see that my experience is transferable. Anyway, I’ve been invited for a round 3 interview next week in the healthcare industry, which I think could be the most awesome move for me.

Here’s the problem: while doing research, I found a recent article (November) in the local newspaper the said the hospital I’m interviewing with is considering selling. Ouch! In my second interview, I asked if the hosptial is selling and the response I got from the VP was “the article you saw wasn’t accurate, but in healthcare, a sale is always on the table.” So now I’m terrified. I have a good job, great pension and stablility where I am now. The problem is that I have no room for growth. ZERO. And I’m still young and have a lot of years left in me to work so I know deep in my heart I have to move on. If the hospital makes me an offer, do I go for it with the risk that it could be short-term? Or do I stay in my comfort zone and hope something else comes along?

Well, if you’re leaving government, you’re going to have to deal with this to some extent wherever you go. (And there aren’t always news articles to warn you when it might be coming!) Companies get sold, or lay off whole departments, or lose funding — there’s never a guarantee that that won’t happen. So you’ve got to make a calculation about whether you want the benefits of leaving more than you want the more certain stability of where you are. That said, I’d proceed pretty cautiously with this particular job, given what you read. The VP likely wouldn’t tell you if a sale was imminent, not before employees and the public had been told, so I’d do your own research rather than relying on her word.

It’s terse answer Thursday — seven short answers to seven short questions. Here we go…

1. My boss and I like each other and it’s uncomfortable

My boss is a female and I am a male. We are both married. I really do like her and she gives me the impression she likes me too. The problem is that I think I make her uncomfortable because she likes me. Neither of us have done or would ever do anything inappropriate, but my thinking that I make her uncomfortable is bothering me. I see how she interacts with other people and she is very relaxed and comfortable, but with me she is tense and nervous. It’s because I genuinely like her and working for her that her uneasiness bothers me. I’m a shy introvert and ahe has also admitted the same to me. When we are alone, it is a little better but around other people she practically ignores me. I want to confront her, but think it might make her even more uncomfortable, and the whole idea of making her uncomfortable is making me uncomfortable. I thought it was cute at first, but it’s been 8 months and starting to make me feel some kind of way. Can’t emphasize enough that we get along fine. It’s just this tension between us. How should I resolve this?

Pretend it’s not happening, and interact with her like you would anyone else. Do not under any circumstances “confront” her about what you believe her feelings to be; that would be wildly inappropriate.

Also, consider the possibility that she’s uncomfortable around you because you’re either giving her the vibe that you’re attracted to her or that you think she’s attracted to you — either one would make one’s manager uncomfortable.

2. Coworker distracts me by looking at me

I work in a small office and unfortunately I am easily distracted. I have a coworker who often gets up and every time they do, as soon as they are in view, they look at me. Almost every time and it is making me feel uncomfortable. Is this action normal?

It’s annoying, but it’s not shockingly uncommon. Can you put up some kind of barrier?

3. Interpreting interviewer’s signals at the end of an interview

I had my first-round interview on Monday. I did okay on the interview, with some good answers and some bad ones. I’m worried that I may have done worse than I thought though because she didn’t ask for references at the end, and also said, “Thanks for coming in” at the end. Do these things mean anything? Could it be that they don’t ask for references until the second interview? She did tell me that they will know by next week regarding the candidates for the second interview, and that I am welcome to follow up in the meantime. (I don’t intend on following up until at least a week has passed, don’t worry :D )

I wouldn’t read anything into either of those things. Employers often don’t ask for references until the very end of the process, and “thanks for coming in” is a normal thing to say at the end of an interview, because they want to thank you for, well, coming in. It’s not dismissive or code for “I don’t expect to ever speak to you again” or anything like that.

4. Offering a personal business card to your interviewer

I saw another blog recommending that you should bring your own business cards with your contact info on them to hand out at interviews. Is this now a thing?

I hope not. Anyone interviewing you has your contact information, because they have your resume. Business cards that you’d have printed up specially for job-seeking would be extraneous.

5. Vacation days when you start a new job at the end of the year

I have been at my new job for just under a month. My offer included 5 vacation days which expire January 1, 2013. Associates hired this late in the year typically do not get any vacation days, but since my offer was somewhat generous, I figured the days were just an added bonus. Last week, I inquired about scheduling some of the paid days off, and my manager seemed surprised. She did not know that I was given any and really had to scrounge the calendar to find some dates that would work. Now I am concerned how “needing a vacation” after just a few weeks will make me look. Am I jeopardizing people’s view of my work ethic by not letting these days go to waste?

Probably. I know that they were part of your offer, but in general taking time off right after starting a job doesn’t look great. The holidays are often an exception, but I’d use them only for specifically holiday time (i.e., the days connected to Christmas and New Year’s), and only if your manager doesn’t seem put out. I’d value the impression you’re making on your new manager over the principle of being able to use days that were part of your offer.

6. Avoiding looking like a job-hopper

I graduated from college two years ago, and since then have had terrible luck beyond my control in terms of employment. My first professional job was with a small start-up company, but I was caught in a downsize only three months after starting the position. I’ve been at my current job for a year now, but the company is in dire financial straits, the workplace environment has become toxic, and I’m being forced to take a part-time position working only a fraction of my previous full-time hours. I’m currently job hunting and don’t want to appear negative in any resumes, CVs, or cover letters by mentioning the situations surrounding my short tenures at jobs, but I’m worried that I look like a poorly behaved employee or a job hopper. How would I go about protecting myself from that impression without becoming a case of “the gentleman doth protest too much”?

I’d probably leave the first job off your resume altogether, since three months is such a short stay that you won’t have any notable accomplishments to include anyway, and it won’t strengthen your resume (and instead will just raise questions). That would leave you with just the current job, and you can explain if asked that the company is struggling financially and cutting people’s hours.

7. Confrontational coworker tape-recorded our conversation

I have a coworker who is fairly incompetent. Now I typically don’t care, but here screw ups affect my job as well. I work in the U.S., but my company is based in the UK. I bring this up because it’s my understanding that in the UK they don’t fire people very often, unless they do something totally egregious.

Well today I was working from home, and I found out that this coworker decided to handle something that was my job, not hers (which is a common problem many people have with her). I called to try and A) figure it out so I could correct it, and B) discuss why she felt the need to do it in the first place. The fact that she refuse any wrong doing made me extremely frustrated, and the conversation got pretty heated (more from my end then hers). All of a sudden we were “disconnected”. She then called me back and we talked some more then got “disconnected” again. She called back again and we had some words. It wasn’t going anywhere so I essentially suggested me, her, and her manager have a meeting to discuss this. At the end of the conversation she said that she would let people judge me themselves because she recorded the call. Now aside from that being completely ridiculous to do that to a coworker, I work in Illinois where its actually illegal to record someone without their knowledge.

I’m trying to figure out the best way to go about dealing with this. She is kind of a brat and its probably withing my rights to actually have her arrested, although I think that is a bit extreme (even though I can’t stand her). But my manager is on maternity leave, her manager (who is actually on the organizational chart even with me) isn’t back in the office until next week. Also, we have no HR department in our office and I’m not really familiar with UK HR policies. Talking to this girl clearly doesn’t work since I’m just the latest in a long line of people to have these type of confrontations with her.

Talk to her manager about it when she returns next week. However, it sounds like you weren’t exactly a paragon of professionalism here either. Trying to get a coworker to admit wrongdoing rather than simply solving the problem, “having words” with a coworker, and even contemplating whether you could have her arrested are rarely productive actions, and they’re rarely things that will reflect well on you.

Anyway, talk to her manager about the situation — explain she’s confrontational, difficult to work with, and illegally recorded your conversation as some sort of ammunition, and request that her manager address the problem with her and resolve it, because you need her to adhere to basic levels of professionalism when working with you.