get a new job with this massive discount on the Ask a Manager job-searching bible

by Alison Green on May 4, 2016

how to get a jobLooking for a job?

For the next few days, I’m offering a discount on
my e-book, How to Get a Job: Secrets of a Hiring Manager. Use this discount code today for a massive 40% discount: newjob

If you’ve ever wished that you could look into the brain of a hiring manager to find out what you need to do to get hired, this is for you. Written from my perspective as a long-time hiring manager, this e-book gives you step-by-step guidance through every stage of your job search … explaining at each step what a hiring manager is thinking and what they want to see from you … from getting noticed initially, to nailing the interview, to navigating the tricky post-interview period, all the way through your offer.

You’ll learn things like:

  • what hiring managers are looking for when they ask common interview questions
  • how to talk about sensitive issues when you interview — firings, bad bosses, and more
  • how to avoid companies that aren’t a good fit
  • 6 ways you might be sabotaging your job search
  • 2 ways you can turn rejection to your advantage

Here are some things readers have said after purchasing it:

“This morning my husband had an interview. I bugged him for over a week about reading your guide and he ignored me. Yesterday, I twisted his arm and finally got him to read it. He liked the advice so much he read it a second time. He really took it seriously and followed all of the advice you gave … He just called me to tell me the interview was done and that it had been the best interview he had ever had.” — Kim J.

“I used to have 50/50 luck getting past phone interviews and into the actual in-person interview. Once I read your book, I went 100% in getting past the phone interview, and I was ALWAYS in the top running for every position since then. I absolutely know it was because of your advice in the book. I could just feel the quality of my interviews go up exponentially after I read it.” — Russell B.

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Get your copy with your 40% off discount code (newjob) now!

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manager sent former employee a litany of complaints about her work, how to stop “reply all,” and more

by Alison Green on May 4, 2016

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…

1. Manager sent former employee a litany of complaints about her work

What is the proper way for an employer to handle a sudden resignation given with no notice or very short notice?

My friend, who we’ll call Jane, works as a medical secretary in small practice with 15 doctors. She is supervised by an office manager, Mary. Jane and Mary have never gotten along. They had tolerated each other for four years until it came to a breaking point. In the heat of the moment, Jane verbally resigned and handed back all property belonging to the practice, including keys and alarm codes. Jane walked out and never went back.

Seven days later, Mary sent a three-page letter to Jane by registered mail. In the letter, Mary acknowledged Jane’s resignation and informed her that she will be paid a severance as outlined in her contract. However, out of 20 paragraphs, 15 of them dealt with what Mary perceived to be issues. Mary went on to reprimand Jane on several aspects of her work, as well as what Mary perceived to be flaws in Jane’s character. Not a single word regarding the abrupt resignation, just a long rant on what Mary found unpleasant in Jane’s personality.

I think those 15 paragraphs were totally inappropriate. I think Mary should have simply restricted herself to accepting the resignation and explaining the rest of the separation process. There was no need to reprimand Jane ex post facto. Am I crazy to think that Mary’s letter was unprofessional? How do employers usually handle a sudden and unannounced resignation?

Yes, Mary was unprofessional. If she had concerns with Jane’s work, the time to give her that feedback was while she was still employed there. Dumping it on her after she has resigned serves no purpose other than to give herself the satisfaction of feeling like she had the last word. Moreover, since Jane was no longer working there at that point, it’s not even work feedback — it’s just taking the opportunity to insult someone. It’s obnoxious, and it reflects badly on Mary, both as a jerk and as a manager who apparently didn’t deal with issues while it was her job to deal with them.

The proper way to handle it would have been to stay focused on logistics and leave it at that.

2. I don’t want my coworkers to spot me interviewing at a conference

A little over a month ago, I had a phone interview with a hiring manager. The interview was conducted over the phone because he is based in a different state from where the position is located. A few weeks ago, he contacted me to request to meet me in person when he is in town for a conference. I agreed, thinking that I would meet him at his office at the conclusion of the day’s events. We scheduled this meeting with over a month’s notice because he’s not in town often. Last week, he requested that I meet him during the lunch break of his conference.

The problem is that some people from my office will be attending this conference. I do not want the people at my current position to know that I am interviewing, and I was planning on using a doctor’s appointment as an excuse for escaping for a few hours. I do not want to seem difficult, especially because the manager seems to be squeezing me in during a brief visit. How should I proceed? Should I risk bumping into my colleagues to avoid inconveniencing my potential new boss?

If you explain it, he should understand. I’d say this: “My only concern with that plan is that several of my current colleagues are attending that conference and I haven’t yet told anyone about my job search. I’m a little worried about starting speculation if we’re overseen. Would it be possible to meet away from the conference venue? I can be as flexible as you need with my schedule while you’re here.”

3. My boss watches porn at work, and I can hear it

I work for a small company in New Hampshire. There are a total of 10 employees and not much for a chain of command. I basically answer to the owner but am having an issue with him and am not comfortable talking to him about this.

I sit outside of his office. He is in there watching porn on his computer. I know this for sure, as from time to time he forgets to turn down the volume and I can hear it. Are there any laws that can help me? Can I leave a job and be able to go to my local unemployment office? I can not afford to be without an income so I have stayed for far too long at this point. I have been trying to find another position but am having no luck.

Ick. There are indeed laws that can help you! Sexualizing your workspace by putting you in a position where you have hear porn can trigger laws against sexual harassment. People sometimes think that for something to qualify as harassment, it has be directed toward you (like unwelcome comments made directly to you), but the law also covers “conduct of a sexual nature when this conduct creates an intimidating, hostile, or offensive work environment.”

The size of your company is too small to give you protection under the federal sexual harassment law (which doesn’t kick in until 15 employees), but New Hampshire’s state law kicks in at six employees. The state agency to contact is the New Hampshire Commission for Human Rights.

As for whether you could quit and get unemployment, it would likely hinge on whether your state unemployment agency considers your working conditions so unacceptable that you had no choice but to quit (“constructive discharge”). I can’t tell you if this would qualify in their eyes, but if you contact them, they may be able to give you some guidance.

4. How to get people to stop using “reply all”

I’m hoping you can help me find the words to let employees know that using “reply all” isn’t necessary in many situations. I need to send out an email to all the employees that when they receive an email from a colleague, it would be appreciated that they just reply to the sender and not everyone, when it is not necessary.

For example, an employee is leaving and sent out an email to all the employees to say goodbye. Many of the employees responded back but did a “reply all”. I, as well as all the others, don’t need to see the personal replies back. This happens too often and I would like to send out a straightforward but gentle email to ask them to not do this.

This is the kind of thing where the more you agonize over your wording, the weirder and more tortured it’s likely to sound. Just be straightforward: “Hey y’all, we have enough people here where it can really flood people’s inboxes if you use ‘reply all’ to respond to messages that don’t truly need to go to all. Please don’t use ‘reply all’ unless everyone on the email chain truly does need to see your response.”

But I also wouldn’t do it immediately after the example you described; it’s likely to come across as a little heartless if it seems like it’s a direct response to people giving well wishes to a coworker. Wait a respectable period of time first.

5. What address to use when I’m job searching from another country

I am finishing up a job contract overseas and have started to look for work back in my home state. While abroad for two years, I used a relative’s home in my home state as a permanent address. I discuss in my cover letter my situation and time frame for moving. My question is about what address to use. On my resume, I provide my email and just the city and country I’m in. Is this sufficient? Also some jobs require submitting online forms with fields asking for my address. Can I use my permanent U.S. address instead of the foreign one? I am concerned about being disregarded before a person even looks at my cover letter and resume.

I’d use the U.S. address with a note explaining the situation, since otherwise yes, employers may feel there’s a higher barrier to considering you (because there can be some inconvenience attached to interviewing candidates in other countries). I’d do it this way:

123 Warbleworth Lane
Austin, TX 78701
(returning to Texas in June 2016; currently based in Madrid, Spain)

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can I ask for a second chance to interview if I feel like I didn’t get a fair shot?

by Alison Green on May 3, 2016

A reader writes:

I have a question about an interview I had recently.

I applied for a position that I seem well-qualified for as a well-rounded potential employee. I was asked to set up a short 10-minute phone interview with a recruiter, and it went okay. Nothing good, nothing bad, the guy conducting it basically seemed to tell me details of the job more than asking questions about me. At the end of the interview, he said that my information would be forwarded to a hiring manager in 24-48 hours. I was so happy after I hung up the phone, only to open my email almost immediately after the interview ended and see that I had gotten a letter stating they are looking for other candidates.

I feel that I am a really good candidate for the job. Would be acceptable to try and find someone else to speak with and possibly get a second initial interview? This is a large Fortune 250 company, so I imagine it could get tricky trying to find the appropriate seniority of the hiring department. I literally cannot think of a single reason of why the guy wouldn’t want to forward me, as I have enough work experience, and education for the position, or why he would lie to me like that. I’m not the person to ever have complained, but I don’t really feel the phone screening was fair at all, as I didn’t really get a chance to talk about myself.

The job is still open. Should I update my resume some and reapply? Should I try to call the local site HR manager (as this was a national call center)? I’ve never asked for a second chance like this, and I’m uncertain of how to handle this.

Nope. The put you into a process that they believe works for them, and they decided not to move you forward.

It’s possible that their decision isn’t really about you at all and is just about having stronger candidates who they want to focus on. Keep in mind that whether you move forward in a hiring process isn’t just about whether you’re qualified and didn’t do anything to disqualify yourself; it’s also about how you compare to the other candidates they’re considering. You could be very good, but if other people are great, you’re probably not moving forward. Or, you could even be great, but if 15 other people are great too, they’re probably not going to interview all of you.

That said, I don’t want to mislead you and tell you that’s the only explanation. It is possible that it’s about an impression that you made in the phone interview. You noted that you didn’t get a chance to talk about yourself much, but there are ways to become a definite no in just a few minutes of conversation — such as if you seemed too low-energy, or unenthused about the job, or unprepared for the interview, or arrogant, or all sorts of other things that can move you straight to a rejection. And actually, your description of the interview as “nothing good, nothing bad” may be a clue — employers are usually looking for “great,” and if other candidates are wowing them, they’re not going to move forward the “nothing good, nothing bad” candidates.

Now, did the recruiter lie to you when he said that he’d send your information to the hiring manager in 24-48 hours? What’s most likely is that he said that on auto-pilot without thinking it through, and that when he hung up and processed the conversation, he realized that didn’t make sense to do. That’s pretty common in hiring, and so is thinking you’re going to advance someone in the process and then having stronger candidates come along and knock the person out of the running, or learning some key detail that changes your opinion (for example, the hiring manager might tell the recruiter “we realized the person we hire needs to be stronger in X than we originally thought” or “we now have two really great finalists, so at this point let’s only move forward new candidates who are unusually stellar”).

It’s frustrating when you feel like you’d be a great candidate for a job and don’t get a chance to demonstrate it. But you’ve got to remember that the employer knows far more about what they’re looking for than you do, and they know far more about what the other candidates are like. And as much as you might want them to give you what feels like a fair shot, they get to figure out the process that’s most effective for them.

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how to help a staff member be more confident

by Alison Green on May 3, 2016

Employees who lack confidence are less likely to take initiative, generate new ideas, or act decisively when it’s needed. So as a manager, it’s important to build up team members’ confidence. You don’t want to give people false bravado, of course, but you do want to give them confidence in the skills and instincts they have.

Here are four ways to do it.

1. Don’t assume that people know how good you think they are. Managers often assume that their best people know they’re top performers. And certainly some of them do. But a surprising number of people don’t actually realize what high esteem their managers hold them in. (This can be especially common among high-performing junior staff, who may not yet have enough experience in the work world to have a good sense of where their skills rate.) Additionally, people may not know the specifics of what you think they do well. So make a point of talking to people about their strengths, and what they excel at.

2. Show respect for their skills and their judgment. If you want employees to respect their own skills and instincts, you need to show that you respect those things too. That means that even when you think someone is off-base about something, your respect for their skills and their thinking should lead you to take their opinion seriously – and to show that you do, by saying things like, “That’s interesting – tell me more about why you see it that way” or “Here’s what led me to think X instead – what do you think about that?” You can also show respect for their thinking by soliciting their input on your own projects and decisions. Simply saying “I’ve been grappling with Y – what do you think?” can be a powerful confidence booster. (Plus, involving people in higher-level decision-making will help hone their judgment, which in time will lead to better decision-making ability, which will in turn build confidence.)

3. Give them stretch projects. Giving people assignments that stretch their skills can be one of the greatest ways to directly show people what they’re capable of. Make sure you make a point of explaining why you think they’ll be able to handle it, such as explaining that you’ve seen them do an outstanding job in a similar area. And crucially, since the point here is to build confidence, not destroy it, make sure that you’re coaching and supporting people doing stretch work more closely than you would with work they were more familiar with.

4. Approach mistakes the right way. When employees doubt themselves, even small mistakes can reinforce that they’re right not to be confident. Let people know that it’s okay to make mistakes, as long as they’re learning from the experience and not making the same mistakes over and over. Model through your own behavior – both in regard to your own mistakes and those of others – that getting it wrong sometimes is a part of taking risks and an opportunity to figure out how to do better next time.

I originally published this at Intuit QuickBase’s blog.

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here’s another example of a great cover letter

by Alison Green on May 3, 2016

I often get asked for examples of good cover letters, and a reader recently sent me a great one that I want to share. One thing I like about this one is that it’s shorter than others I’ve previously shared and so is a good demonstration of how you can go shorter and still be compelling.

I’m presenting it here with the caveats I’ve learned to give when sharing these:

• The writer has kindly allowed me to share this here as a favor. Please remember she’s a real person when you’re commenting.
• This writer’s voice is her voice. It will not be your voice, and that’s part of the point.
• There is no single cover letter in the world that all hiring managers will love or that would be the right fit for every employer and every industry. But I receive letters every week from people telling me that moving in this sort of direction worked for them.
• Do not steal this letter or even parts of it. It works because it’s so customized to the writer. It’s intended for inspiration only — to provide an example of what all the advice here can look like in practice. (Every time I print a cover letter here, it ends up plagiarized all over the internet.) Be warned: stealing it will give you seven years of bad job search luck.

Here’s some background from the writer before we get to the letter itself:

You gave me a resume critique last year, which was very helpful. But I, like many others, originally started following AAM due to your posts on cover letters. Well, I’m sure you get these emails a lot, but I wanted to let you know that your advice helped me land a job!

I’ve been searching for about two years, and I got a call last Tuesday. The manager pretty much started with, “We were very intrigued by your cover letter…” and repeated this about two or three times between our phone conversation and the interview that followed the next day! On Friday, I got the offer! (It’s a very busy time for the company, thus the whirlwind hiring timeline.)

After I got back from work the day I accepted the job, I found an email from another company asking for a phone interview. When I politely declined, they wished me luck, but said I had been at the top of their list!

Here’s the letter, with identifying details changed.

Dear Hiring Manager,

I came upon your listing for a Customer Service Coordinator while browsing Indeed, and it really jumped out at me. It doesn’t seem like a normal customer service job, but one that presents new challenges that even I, a 10-year veteran of customer relations, would find new and interesting. Using my head to solve problems and going the extra mile to satisfy customers come naturally to me, and I’m sure I would be able to continue your company’s tradition of excellence in customer service.

When I work retail, I’m not just a cashier; I am a teacher, a problem solver, and a friend to all my coworkers and customers. Working at Storm’s End especially, I often coached my customers on how to use the new camera they had just bought, or show them all the features of the iPod Touch their child wanted, and helped determine which model was right for them. Even at the Iron Bank, there were times where I would be sitting in the café with a customer who just couldn’t get their Kobo e-reader to boot up. Outside of work, I took it upon myself to become familiar with the products we carried so I could answer any questions that came my way. I’ve prided myself in being the employee managers can rely on, and I would love to bring this dedication to the City Watch.

My initial role at the Iron Bank was to follow up with our clients for executed documents. With very little to go on and no one to instruct me, I was able to devise a process which streamlined my follow ups, allowing me to take on additional responsibilities. My greatest achievement was the document execution escalation procedure I created, which was used by our department. One of my supervisors gave me the moniker of “escalation guru” due to my tenacity in getting affidavits back on time.

I was thrilled to read about this opportunity and am eager to learn more about it. I would love to meet with you and discuss the contributions I can make to the City Watch as your new Customer Service Coordinator.

Sincerely,

Brienne of Tarth

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boss and coworker are intense BFFs, mediocre employee wants me to accommodate her school schedule

by Alison Green on May 3, 2016

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…

1. Mediocre employee wants me to accommodate her school schedule

One of my direct reports, Jane, told me that she recently made the decision to go back to school and get a business degree. I was really excited for her. Then she told me that based on the classes that she signed up for and the campus that she decided on (45 minutes away), she needed me to change her schedule to an hour and half earlier. My heart sank. Being a call center, we have pretty set schedules to maintain coverage and the shifts are based on seniority. Not only do we not have a slot on an earlier schedule, but she doesn’t have the seniority to be moved to an earlier slot if one were to open.

I mentioned this to Jane, and she got upset, stating that we’ve made accommodations for others, so why not for her. This isn’t entirely true. It’s true that other departments have made accommodations for school schedules, but these are for non-phone based employees outside of the call center. Also, the one employee who works closely with our department (but is not a call center employee) who they’ve made serious accommodations for is an outstanding performer. Jane is mediocre at best.

I feel a little bit conflicted. There is the side of me that understands the importance of a degree and how frustrating it is to try to overcome the obstacles in the way of a degree. This part of me wants to give her a high five for her initiative and do whatever I can to help. Then there is the manager side of me that thinks that there’s no way that I can make these accommodations while being fair to the rest of the department. I’d have to create a spot on the earlier shift and move her schedule ahead of three people with more seniority (and who are all better performers). This part of me wants to ask why anyone would sign up for classes without checking to see if their work schedule could be moved, or why someone would decide to take classes 45 minutes away when there is literally a college across the street from our building (don’t worry – I won’t actually ask her this, as I realize it’s none of my business).

You can support Jane in going back to school, while also holding firm that you can’t disadvantage other, better coworkers to accommodate her. Just be straightforward about the situation. For example: “I think it’s great that you’re going back to school, but I’m not able to change your schedule. I don’t have a spot on the earlier shift, and if one opened up, we have three people with more seniority who would be in line for it first. I can’t change the promises we’ve made to them. You’re right that other teams have made accommodations for school schedules, but those are employees outside the call center. Our schedules are more rigid here, and we can’t do that. I understand that that means that you may not be able to stay on here.”

And then hold firm. You absolutely shouldn’t be breaking your own rules and disadvantage others in order to keep on someone you describe as “mediocre at best.”

Read an update to this letter here.

2. My boss is intense BFFs with my coworker

I work for a very large Fortune 500 company. There is an HR policy in place regarding conflicts of interest for family members and opposite-sex relationships. However, there is not a policy regarding same-sex friendships.

In my department, my manager and coworker have a very intense personal relationship (non-sexual). They work out together during the week and on weekends, they attend all sorts of sporting events, they dine together, they take expensive vacations together (spas/vacations out of the country – one of which was financed by my manager), they text, they are in each other’s offices all day, they take selfies and post them on Facebook, and they share clothing. It is a very close friendship.

As a result, the coworker has a LOT of power in our group. She has unlimited access to our boss, and she is able to direct her own narrative. Our boss maintains that she can be objective. I disagree. There have been a number of instances where this coworker’s behavior was excused instead of addressed. She can act, essentially, with impunity. My bosses’ boss knows about this friendship, and either hasn’t or won’t address it. It could be that I have been existing in this dysfunctional environment for too long, but I’m starting to think that maybe I am wrong. Is this a conflict or am I off base?

No, it’s a huge conflict! You don’t have to be having sex with someone to have inappropriate biased in their favor or to be perceived as having inappropriate bias in their favor.

Occasionally working out together or dining together? Not a big deal on its own. But hanging out on weekends, vacationing together (!), sharing clothing (!), and all the rest? A huge deal. A huge, massive, ridiculous, complete abdication of your manager’s job. She’s far, far over the line of what’s appropriate. No one looking at that would believe that she can be unbiased or objective about your coworker, which means that she’s not able to do her job.

As for what to do … if her boss knows and won’t address it (huge failure on her part too), there might not be much you can do. You could talk to your boss or her boss and explain how the dynamic is impacting your department, but I’m skeptical that the friendship would actually get dialed back to an appropriate level (i.e., about 5% of where it is currently) without a serious mandate from someone above her who truly sees why this is completely not okay.

3. When a good employee resigns

I’m a new manager, and one of my strongest employees has decided to resign. It wasn’t an easy decision for her to make, so I’ve tried to be respectful and supportive while she makes her exit. Having never gone through this process before, it made me wonder if there’s something I can be doing to help give closure? Besides having her walk me through her job list and files, is it weird to have a one-on-one exit interview with her? I know that’s something HR will be doing, but is it normal practice for managers to give one as well? I meet with all my employees regularly, so I have a good sense of how she feels about this position and job, but I wonder if she would like the opportunity to give feedback, which could help determine how I train/direct the new employee filling her old position?

It would be weird to ask her to do a second formal exit interview with you, but not weird at all to talk informally with her and ask if there’s anything you could have done differently to keep her, what feedback she might want to share that would help you manage better or the department run better; and what advice she has on acclimating her replacement.

4. Is it inappropriate for men to initiate handshakes with women at work?

I was recently in a meeting with someone who claimed that it’s inappropriate for men to initiate handshakes with women in the workplace because “it could be seen as sexual harassment.” For the full effect, please imagine the speaker leaning forward and saying it an extremely serious tone, wide-eyed, followed by “I bet you didn’t know that, did you?” I tried to gently disagree, but she was very, VERY sure that This Is A Thing.

My first instinct is that this is total hogwash, perhaps even a boogeyman made up by people who don’t like the fact that it’s no longer okay to sexually harass your coworkers? However, I’m in academia, so I’m fairly disconnected from the corporate environment, and really, anything is possible. This is definitely Not A Thing, right?

P.S. She teaches this to students. It was all I could do to not yell THIS IS NOT A THING in the middle of the meeting!

What?! No, this is not a thing. In fact, it’s horribly sexist and old-fashioned and doesn’t belong in the workplace. No one in the workplace should be treating colleagues differently based on their sex, and it’s gross that she’s teaching students that they’re supposed to. Please intervene, for the principle of it and for the good of her students.

5. Interviewing with a prominent scar

I broke my wrist pretty badly a few months ago, and wound up needing surgery to get some plates put in. Everything internally is healing up fine, but the scar that was left behind is pretty prominent. Hopefully this will get better with time, but at the moment, the location and size of my scar make it look like I tried to kill myself. It’s red and angry looking enough that unless I try very hard to hide it, it’s pretty visible (even in long sleeves). In my day-to-day life, when I meet new people, I show off my “badass scar from playing sports” and that seems to ease people’s discomfort.

The problem is, I am also searching for a new job. I know first impressions count, and this scar could count against me for being a “mental health risk.” How do I bring this up with people? It feels a bit overly defensive to say “my scar looks like I tried to kill myself but really I was just playing sports,” and flashing my scar to show off how badass I am is obviously also out of the question.

I think you’re over-thinking it! Assuming it’s going to be visible when you’re shaking hands, just say, “Excuse the scar — I’m healing from a soccer injury” (or whatever). People aren’t likely to think anything of it.

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job candidates who call for more information before we’ve invited them to interview

by Alison Green on May 2, 2016

A reader writes:

I work for a company with a very small number of permanent employees (10) that employs a large number of entry-level seasonal workers (~25) at a couple points in the year. The company is so small that we don’t have landlines; we just have company cell phones, and we have no HR department. The phone number that goes on our website, brochures, etc. is my number (since my role involves dealing with the public) so although I do not hire anyone myself, I am the one who job seekers call. I can’t give them the number of the actual hiring manager, who is higher up in the organization and doesn’t want to be bothered with dozens of calls any more than I do.

Of course, a quick “did you receive my application materials?” is fine and easy to handle. But oftentimes, job seekers call asking for more details about compensation, the qualifications needed for the position, job duties, etc. BEFORE they have been contacted for an interview.

On the one hand, I don’t want to be one of those snooty HR people, and I know this would be the first job for a lot of these folks. But I’m not in HR, many of these details are on the website/job posting, and honestly, it’s just annoying. The system is pretty automated – within three weeks, they are either contacted for an interview or sent a rejection – so there isn’t even anything I can do.

Neither my manager nor I know how to handle this, so we’re leaving it to you. How much can we tell people when they call? And is there some way we can gently educate young and eager job seekers about what is and isn’t appropriate?

You can tell them as much as you’d like, but most organizations don’t, simply because it can end up taking a huge amount of time.

It’s perfectly reasonable and a very, very normal practice for you to say to callers, “I’m not the hiring manager for this position. The person who is isn’t taking calls about it at this stage. I know she’d be happy to talk in detail about these questions if we move you forward in our process, but for now we’re hoping the information in the job posting on our website will give you a pretty good sense of the job and what we’re looking for.”

That said, though, I would reexamine your ad to make sure that it truly does have enough information in it. Would a reasonable person looking at the ad walk away with a thorough enough understanding of what the job entails, what qualifications you’re seeking, and other key details? If not, that might be part of the reason you’re getting these calls, and being clearer in the ad would be one fix. It won’t fix all of it though; you’ll always get some of these calls.

For what it’s worth, I’ve always noticed a fascinating correlation: The people who call with questions before applying are almost never people you’re going to end up wanting to interview. Strong candidates just don’t do it. Plus, annoyingly often these callers aren’t truly seeking information; they’re seeking contact with a human so they can pitch themselves for the job or try to make a positive impression, which is not something you’re obligated to accommodate.

It’s reasonable to funnel people through the process you’ve established for each side to learn more about the other.

* An exception to this would be if you were hiring for a very senior or hard-to-fill job — in which case it makes sense to invest more time in cultivating people. But that doesn’t sound like it’s the case here.

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7 ways you’re driving your coworkers batty

by Alison Green on May 2, 2016

Anyone who’s ever had a job knows the special hell of annoying coworkers who get on your last nerve at work and from whom you can’t escape because you’re both required to work together. But have you ever considered that you yourself might be that annoying coworker for some of your colleagues?

If you’re doing any of the following seven things at work, chances are pretty high that you are the one who some of your coworkers are venting about to family and friends when they go home each day.

1. Regularly cc’ing people’s managers when you don’t need to. There are certainly times when it’s appropriate to cc someone’s manager, such as when there’s a problem that you haven’t been able to get resolved by talking with the person directly or when the manager has asked to be kept in the loop on the topic in question. But if you regularly copy a manager because you think it will get your message taken more seriously or attended to more quickly or because you want to get someone corrected from above, you’re going to become the target of some serious coworker wrath. You’re essentially saying “I don’t trust you to take care of this unless your manager is watching you.” If you want to have cordial relationships with your colleagues, you should pay them the respect of trusting them to do their jobs on their own (until and unless they demonstrate that you can’t). Moreover, you’re likely to annoy the managers you’re cc’ing as well, since they probably trust their staff to carry out their job duties without constant oversight, and they have a team specifically so that they don’t need to deal with every item that comes up.

2. Playing the martyr. If you’re constantly talking about how overworked you are and how late you worked last night, if you never take a vacation (even though your manager would support you in getting time away), and/or if you come to work sick and contagious, it’s a pretty safe assumption that your coworkers are weary of your martyrdom. You also might be inadvertently leading people to wonder why you’re not able to work more efficiently or re-prioritize your workload.

3. Letting technology regularly distract you during meetings. In most offices, it’s no big deal to discreetly glance at your phone once or twice during a meeting. But if you’re regularly getting distracted by your phone or your email, you’re being rude to colleagues. This is particularly fraught when there’s a power dynamic in play; if you’re meeting with someone more junior, that person probably won’t be able to call you out on it or even politely ask you to give them your full attention – but they almost certainly want it.

4. Parenting your coworkers. Your coworkers are presumably adults and don’t need to be reminded to take a jacket to lunch when it’s cold outside, eat a healthier breakfast, take safety precautions when traveling to a dangerous area, or otherwise conduct themselves like grown-ups. Sometimes people take this kind of parental approach toward younger colleagues, figuring that it’s a genuinely warm and even affectionate way to behave, without realizing how condescending it can come across to people on the receiving end.

5. Commenting on your coworkers’ food or diets. You might think that you’re just being friendly when you comment on what a coworker is or isn’t eating, but many people don’t want their food choices scrutinized. That’s particularly true if your statements include value-loaded comments about dieting or staying thin. Comments like “it must be nice not to have to worry about your waistline” when a coworker is eating French fries or “come on, live a little” when a coworker turns down a cupcake are inappropriately boundary-pushing. You also never know if a coworker might be struggling with an eating disorder. It’s far more polite and considerate not to comment on other people’s food choices.

6. Following up your emails with a phone call. If you’re guilty of sending an email and then immediately calling the recipient to make sure they received it – or worse, dropping by in-person to say “Have you seen my email yet?” – you are violating professional etiquette and you must stop immediately. Part of the point of email is that the recipient can read it when convenient and you are annoying your colleagues if you’re not giving them a reasonable amount of time to read and respond before you check back in.

7. Disrupting the office with your cell phone ring. If you go to a meeting and leave your cell phone behind at your desk without muting the ringer, you’re likely to return to seething coworkers who have been interrupted by your loud ring tone, possibly over and over. And speaking of ring tones, if your ringer must be turned on at work (and that in itself is questionable), make sure your ringer is something discreet and professional, not something loud and jarring. In particular, if you’re picking a pop song, proceed with extreme caution.

I originally published this at U.S. News & World Report.

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I was fired and then offered my job back a week later

by Alison Green on May 2, 2016

A reader writes:

I work for a small law firm as an attorney and left a higher paying job with a firm in another state to work there. I’ve been employed there for five months, but I’ve only been working for three months because I was severely ill and had surgery unexpectedly two months into my tenure, and was on medical leave for two months. I’ve been back to work for about a month.

I actually expected them to let me go while I was out, but all of the partners were very accommodating and said everyone wanted me back and that they would do their best to accommodate me. Of note is that I don’t think my leave was protected, as I haven’t worked there long enough and the firm isn’t big enough to be subject to leave laws. So, if they wanted me gone, I’m not sure why they didn’t just let me go while I was on leave.

Without any explanation, approximately one month after I returned from medical leave, one of the four partners took me out to lunch and told me “it’s not working out” and “they [the other partners] want [me] gone but will give [me] three months to find something else.” Of note is that I have not had ANY bad reviews, feedback, or personality conflicts with anyone, and I like my job and the people I work with very much. I expressed as much to this partner and asked for the reason behind this gut-punch. Nonetheless, despite a three-hour lunch conversation with this partner, I was never given any substantive reason other than that the firm has a “revolving door” and he’s had this conversation “many times before.”

After wallowing in feelings of inadequacy, self-loathing, and doubt for over a week and informing my friends and family of my impending termination, however, said partner invites me out to coffee the following week. He then says the other partners feel like they “haven’t given [me] a chance” and they’re not firing me after all!

To say I’m confused, hurt, disgusted, etc. would be the understatement of the year. I don’t have any other job options at the moment, and lawyers don’t find new jobs easily in general right now, let alone after a few months’ tenure in this particular practice area. Having said that, however, the idea of continuing to work for this firm makes me feel ill. What do I do, and what on earth was this about? There really are no other details that I’m leaving out–I’m as confused by this as I’m sure you will be reading it.

Well, it’s possible that it was related to the medical leave, but most employers would be reasonable about that, and an employer ready to fire you over that would usually do it during the leave itself (“unfortunately we can’t let the position go unfilled this long”) rather than a month after you came back. I suppose it’s possible that they’re nervous about whether a health condition will pull you away for a long stretch again, and that would explain their vagueness since even if they’re too small to be subject to laws around leave, few people want to say “we’re firing you because of your health.”

But the partner’s remark that the firm has a revolving door and that he’s had a similar conversation many times before makes me think that’s not the reason, or at least that it’s not the full reason.

My best guess is that these people are terrible at one or more of the following:
* hiring people who are right for what they need
* setting clear expectations with new people about what they’re looking for and how to succeed (and so people inevitably don’t meet those expectations)
* understanding what’s realistic to expect from a new hire a few months in
* working with people who differ in some way from themselves

And no guessing is needed for this one: We know for sure that they’re terrible at communicating. We know that because otherwise they would have given you feedback all along about whatever concerns they had, or at least at a minimum would have explained those concerns when they decided to fire you. “It’s not working out” is rarely a sufficient explanation to give someone you’re firing; they owed you an attempt to put their concerns into words, even if it was difficult or awkward to do.

They especially owed you that because you left a job in another state to move there for this one. I mean, they’d owe it to anyone, no matter how soft of a landing that person was going to have, but reasonable employers know that there are extra burdens when someone moves to take the job. That doesn’t mean that they have to keep someone who’s not working out, but it means that they owe them a clear explanation (as well as some serious severance, which we’ll get to in a minute).

As for what to do now … that’s hard to say without knowing things like your finances, your other options, and how easily you’ll find a new job. Ideally, you wouldn’t return to this one, since it’s very unlikely that it could be a long-term home for you; in addition to what they’ve exposed themselves as, you’d always be wondering if you’d be fired out of the blue again.

However, if your financial situation doesn’t allow for you to say no, then it could make sense to return so that you have a paycheck coming in, while conducting the most aggressive job search of your life.

Either way, this could be an interesting opportunity to try to extract information out of them. You could say something like, “I appreciate the offer of my job back, but can you help me understand what happened? I’m still in the dark about why I was let go in the first place and if I came back, I’d want to make sure I understand what happened.”

Also, if you choose not to return, I hope you’ll think about trying to negotiate a severance package. This may be complicated by the fact that they’re now offering to let you return, but in general, “I left a higher paying job and moved here for this job, and you fired me without good reason” makes a pretty compelling argument for severance.

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manager leaves to get her hair done during the workday, should I sing a song at my interview, and more

by Alison Green on May 2, 2016

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…

1. My manager leaves to get her hair done during the workday

I work for a small firm with a fairly laid-back environment. One of my bosses regularly schedules her multi-hour hair appointments for workday afternoons. Every other month or so, she leaves work at 3 and comes to work the next day with freshly styled hair. She will leave meetings and reschedule work activities (conference calls, etc.) around her appointments, and it seems unlikely that she’s using her vacation/personal time for the time she’s taking off.

I understand that hair appointments are important and do take a significant amount of time. I have also scheduled hair cuts and coloring appointments during the week, but always after work hours. I don’t really want to confront her about this or even try to get her in trouble for it, but I do wonder if this is more acceptable than I’m thinking it is. To me, it seems unprofessional to run out to a grooming appointment during work time. Is this appropriate?

Yes, in lots of offices, this would be perfectly fine, especially for someone senior enough to make decisions about how to manage her own time (and your manager probably falls in that category). Particularly in jobs where you end up doing work in the evenings and on the weekends, reasonable employers are fine with people stepping out mid-day to take care of something personal. Hell, even in jobs where you’re not typically working outside of regular hours, reasonable employers will be fine with people occasionally stepping out for personal reasons. (You also don’t know if she’s using PTO for that time or not. She very well may be.)

For what it’s worth, if I were your manager I’d be pretty annoyed that you thought this was an issue. Assuming she’s generally competent at her job and the department is not falling apart because she leaving work a couple of hours early now and then, you should stop thinking of this as a problem.

2. Should I sing a song at my interview?

I have an interview in a week at a well-established clothing company for a job doing phone and email customer support. If there’s a chance to sell something along the way, the support agents are expected to do a good job with that too.

They asked the candidates to bring an object and have a presentation about the object. It can be presented as we wish.

Straight away, I knew I had to bring my guitar and I have a whole thing prepared already. But then suddenly I got the idea that I could write a song about my guitar and present it that way? Do you think they will appreciate that? I don’t know if it’s too risky. I know they will remember me for it, but will they think it’s not serious? It just seems kind of boring to bring a guitar without playing anything on it.

Don’t do it. Exercises like this are generally supposed to give a window into your work skills. You’re not going to be singing to customers (I’m assuming/hoping), so doing your presentation in song isn’t going to give them information about how you’d perform on the job, which is what they’re looking for.

That said, I’m 100% sure that there are some hiring managers out there who would like this and think that it demonstrated personality and energy … but there are more who would feel like you missed the point of the exercise.

3. Am I being too persnickety about candidates’ cover letter formatting?

I work in an office at my university, and we are reviewing applications for a graduate assistant position. How important is proper cover letter formatting (such as including the name of the recipient and including a greeting)? A coworker and I disagree about how important it is.

My position is that using a correct business format shows that you are willing to put in a solid amount of effort to complete a task. While I’m not generally a stickler for professional formatting—I’ll often leave out greetings in emails—I do think that if one cannot make the effort to do a task as important as applying for a job properly, then how much effort will you put into task everyday tasks? The way I see it, people who don’t use proper formatting either (1) did not know how to and yet did not take the, arguably, simple step of googling “cover letter format” or (2) were too lazy/didn’t take the application seriously enough to submit a formatted letter. Both of these factors stick out as red flags to me. Am I being too persnickety here?

Are you talking about cover letters that are in the body of the email or attached as a separate document? If it’s in the body of an email, I wouldn’t hold it against someone for not including a formal greeting and a name; ideally they should have those things, but email is an inherently more casual medium than old-school business letters are and I don’t think you should reject anyone over that.

But if you’re talking about a separate document that’s been attached, it does look unpolished when it’s a document with no “dear hiring manager” or “dear Alison” and/or no appropriate closing (“sincerely, Cressida Warbleworth”). I wouldn’t penalize someone for not including the other aspects of a formal business letter though, like the date and the address block; email has really changed the conventions in that regard. (And that stuff definitely doesn’t belong in a cover letter that’s in the body of an email, since email makes that info redundant. In fact, when it appears there, it usually signals lack of savvy since that’s not how email works.)

Definitely don’t penalize people for not tracking down the name of the recipient (I’m not sure if that’s part of what you meant or not); “dear hiring manager” is fine.

So, yes, I might be coming down on the side of “too persnickety” here, depending on which aspects of this are in play.

4. I keep almost falling asleep in meetings

I’m having an issue that’s embarrassing me. I just started a new job a few months back. My small team in a big company is full of reasonably nice, smart people. No team is perfect, though, and one of the few pet peeves I have with them is the excess of long, talky meetings we have. That’s not exactly what this question is about, though.

I keep almost falling asleep in meetings where I’m not directly involved. I’ve tried several things to mitigate this–going to bed earlier (doesn’t work), drinking extra coffee (just gives me a headache and makes it harder to fall asleep that night), taking notes (I end up zoning out anyway), etc. None of it works. Half an hour into that day’s lunch meeting, I’ll be physically struggling to keep my eyelids open.

I’ve had issues sleeping since I was a kid. Nothing serious enough to see a doctor about, I think, but I usually wake up one to three times in an average night and am fairly yawny and groggy the day after that happens. I don’t think my managers have noticed yet, and I’m working very hard outside these meetings. It doesn’t help that I also have ADHD. But I want to find some way to fix this before it starts affecting my reputation at work. Any advice?

See a doctor! It’s negatively impacting your life, despite you trying all the obvious remedies. That moves it into the “yes, talking to a medical professional is now warranted” category. That doesn’t mean that it has to be something serious, but when something impacts your life in a way you don’t like and can’t fix on your own, it’s appropriate to seek professional help.

Read an update to this letter.

5. Can employer move your hours to the next week to avoid paying overtime?

My nephew works for a fast food chain. I looked at his check and feel that he is not being paid correctly. He is paid biweekly.

If he works 50 hours on week 1 and 30 hours on week 2, does he get overtime for week 1? Or does the employer have the right to move those 10 hours into week 2? Also, can an employer take hours you worked in a pay period and move it to the next pay period?

No, an employer can’t move hours around like that. If you worked more than 40 hours in a week, then you need to be paid overtime for that week, and the employer can’t use a two-week period instead of a one-week period.

That said, be aware that the employer gets to decide how they want to define the seven-day work week; they can choose to start it on Sunday or Wednesday or Friday or whatever they want. (But it does need to be the same seven-day period each time; they can’t keep mixing it up to get out of paying overtime.) So one thing to look at it is which seven-day period they’re using, and whether that changes the overtime calculation.

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