Ask a Manager

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…

1. Fired employee wants to attend the company Christmas party

Our office recently let go of an employee for numerous reasons after several warnings, for minor things such as frequent lateness, too many personal calls and emails on company time, general friction with other coworkers, to more serious things such as a very sharp decline in their work quality, cursing at other coworkers, and admitting to getting high at work. Said employee was laid off instead of fired as a sort of favor, and was given the reason as a lack of work for their position.

The problem is, the employee had previously RSVP’ed for the staff Christmas party, which is a fairly formal gathering. They also requested a hotel reservation, which is generously supplied free of charge for those needing one. They have mentioned it to other workers that they will be attending, and they see no problem with it, as they got the party invitation before being let go.

This employee most definitely burned bridges during their final few weeks of work — using four-letter words towards coworkers and calling us a “venomous” office, and did not finish their final tasks without informing anyone, leading to very late nights for the rest of the department to meet a tight deadline. This former employee is now very disliked, and the department mood is now much more relaxed and relieved now that they are gone. As such, most of this department is now refusing to attend the staff party because of the potential for confrontations, especially considering the open bar.

The person in charge of the party is not aware of any of this, and said the company has a policy to let laid off workers attend the Christmas party. However, this is an industry that lays off many workers in the winter and hires them back in the spring, which does not apply to this former employee. My question is should our department head let someone know about the true reason for this firing and have the invitation rescinded?

Yes. If the party organizer doesn’t have this context, they need it. If she just slacked off in her final weeks, that would be one thing, but it’s reasonable that employees shouldn’t be asked to deal with someone who cursed them out and called them “venomous. Your department head should just let the organizer know that the person burned her bridges on the way out of the door and should be removed from the invite list.

Since it sounds like she’d already received an invitation, someone will need to reach out to her and let her know. I’d frame it as “hey, in light of your final weeks with us, it won’t make sense for you to attend the Christmas party.”

I feel like this is going to be a controversial answer, and I do think there’s a counter argument to be made that disinviting someone is really rude and so you should do nothing and just let the chips fall where they may, but this is business function, not a social one, and she basically gave your business the finger. I’m totally okay with saying “hell, no, this is not a person welcome at our employee social events.”

As a side note, it will be extra important that you’re scrupulously fair in all your other dealings with this person though (not fighting her unemployment since you called it a lay-off, not badmouthing her to other staff members, etc.), so that the party thing doesn’t come across as a personal vendetta, just as a matter-of-fact “no, we don’t have people who trash us at our holiday parties, but of course we’ll still meet all of our professional obligations to you” decision.

2. When to bring up foster parenting with contract job that’s likely to turn permanent

I’m in a long-term contract position that has great potential for turning permanent. I’m working my tail off to show my value to the department and my boss, both in getting backlogged work completed and in creating new systems that will make projects move more quickly and transparently. Four months in, I’m building strong trust relationships with my in-company clients, and getting great feedback.

The issue is that my husband and I are expecting a child, but I’m not pregnant. We are in the final stages of being licensed as foster parents, and are planning to adopt from the foster care system. We will likely be getting our license a couple of months after I’m offered a permanent position here at current job, but we will have little to no control over when we have a child placed in our home; we could be waiting for six months or a year to get “the” call, and then may have an hour’s notice or a few weeks’ notice before the child comes to our home.

My husband will qualify for FMLA when our kid arrives and has some flexibility in his schedule, but we will still have to find an appropriate daycare center or local school, and I will need some schedule flexibility to share the childcare load but also for foster-care responsibilities, like court hearings and planning meetings.

In a past letter, you advised a job-seeker to wait to disclose a pregnancy until she received an offer. Would you say the same here, where I’m already a known commodity, won’t be taking maternity leave and don’t know when the blessed event will occur? Or, do I casually mention that I may need time off to deal with a daycare or school change after I’m hired, the same as any parent would if they had something come up?

I’d handle it like you would if you got pregnant a few months after being made permanent: announce it as good news, and explain what you’ll need and your initial thinking for how you’ll be able to make it work. So in this case, I’d probably give your boss a heads-up once you’re licensed or close to when you’re about to be, explain that there’s some unpredictability in when a child will arrive, and that you’re planning to do XYZ to balance work once that happens.

Also, yay to you for being a foster parent!

3. Interviewer rejected me when I said I’m going to school full-time

Recently I was contacted by the CEO of a new start-up for an exciting job opportunity. But when she asked how much longer school would take (a year), she said that she had full-time employment in mind and didn’t think I would be able to dedicate myself to the position. I’m going to school in a subject directly related to the job and have been working a similar job the past two years for another start-up, so I am a very strong candidate. She did say she’d keep in touch, but my boyfriend said that she was probably trying to be amicable.

Should I not mention that I’m going to school full-time if I get a similar offer? I could go to school part-time instead, though I’d rather not. Should I have said that? I admit, I kind of shut down the last few minutes of the interview and didn’t try to make a case for myself. I just thanked her for her time. I’m wondering if I should contact the CEO and ask to be reconsidered, but I’m not sure if that’s something that’s done.

Yeah, a lot of employers are nervous about people going to school full-time while they’re also working full-time, because they’re concerned that you won’t won’t be able to balance both, and that work will suffer. That’s especially true with high-stress or high-workload jobs, and start-ups tend to be both. When an employer tells you that you can’t do both, you should believe them — it often means that they’ll need you to work long or unpredictable hours, and that they’re not going to be willing to accommodate class or studying schedules.

4. Can I get rehired at the company that put me on a PIP?

I received a performance improvement plan (PIP) while working at my previous position this summer. I was at the company for 5-1/2 years. I made efforts toward having the PIP removed for two months, but ultimately resigned and started a new position. After doing contract work for a period of time, I tried to return to my company. When I called, Human Resources informed me that the PIP was preventing me from being rehired. Is this permanent? I’d like to call my manager and ask her about it but I don’t want to embarrass myself or waste her time.

Yeah, it’s probably permanent. Being on a PIP means that your company had major concerns about your performance, and is often the last step before someone is fired. Employers generally don’t want to open the door to that happening again.

5. What should a transition plan include?

I’m expecting a job offer to come through (yay!) and as soon as the paperwork is signed will give my resignation notice. I’m trying to think of what all I need to do before leaving. They don’t typically handle these sorts of things well here, and my current supervisor is new in her role, so I don’t think there is a good plan in place for handling departures. Admittedly I’m a bit overwhelmed so I’m afraid of forgetting something important, and wondered if you had list of things to do before leaving a job or what should be included in a transition plan?

Yes! Meet with your manager to talk about the status of key projects, offer to train anyone who needs to be trained on key tasks, and leave behind notes on stuff that your replacement will need to tackle soon after starting, contact info for key people (vendors, clients, helpful resources), and any helpful advice you have on anything from a performance issues you’re working on with an employee to what printer gives the fastest turnaround time.

But also, keep in mind that you won’t be able to transfer absolutely everything from your brain to the new person, and that’s okay. (And in fact, if you try, no one will retain it all anyway.) Hit the highlights, and things should be fine.

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…

1. The company I interviewed with stole my ideas

What do you think of a company that interviews you, asks you to list specific ways to improve things, but doesn’t hire you — yet implements your suggestions anyway?

I interviewed with a publication several months ago and suggested posting its covers on Instagram. Now they’re doing it. Also, they’re posting tweets in the publication, something else I suggested. I suppose it’s possible that they came up with this on their own. But do companies pick interviewees’ brains for ideas, even when they don’t hire them? Seems pretty crappy if they do.

Most companies don’t. Some companies do. More often than not, it’s unintentional — a candidate says “it would be great to do X,” and the employer thinks, “Hmmm, it would be great to do X.” At that point, it’s a tough situation — because they can’t hire the wrong candidate just because the person suggested something they ended up wanting to do (and you could make great suggestions and still not be the best candidate, for multiple reasons). Also, often the idea is the least of the work, and the real work is in figuring out a strategy and plan and implementing it.

That said, if the idea is a particularly complicated one and the candidate contributed a lot of time and brain power walking the employer through it, they should really pay that person a consulting fee, to avoid bad feelings if nothing else. But suggesting posting publication covers to Instagram is the kind of thing that was going to occur to them at some point anyway … so with that one I think you’ve got to just write it off as not really stolen or something you took a loss on.

2. How to tell an employee not to expose her midriff

How do I talk to an employee who is wearing shirts that are not long enough to cover her midriff? I do not want the conversation to be about her weight (as she is overweight) and clothes not fitting properly but just about general office attire (even though we are business casual) and that your stomach should never be showing under any circumstances.

This one should actually be pretty straightforward: No employee regardless of body type should be wearing shirts that expose their stomach, so you can simply explain that. For example: “Jane, please make sure that your midriff isn’t exposed while you’re in the office. Our dress code requires that midriffs be covered. Thank you!”

3. People keep thinking my last name is my first name

I work in a job where I am responsible for building 1:1 relationships with my company’s field representatives and supporting the work they do for high net worth clients.

I have a last name that sounds like a first name. Let’s say, for example, my name is Kaye (first name) Miranda (last name). It never fails, people in the field erroneously call me Miranda as my first name, although it’s my last name. The curse of two first names. I get it.

Any suggestions on the best way to redirect? I’m not in the military and I’m sure that it’s unintentional when it happens. I’m looking for a suggestion that won’t make people feel bad for calling me the wrong first name, but will nip it in the bud, too.

Just correct people cheerfully, matter-of-factly, and quickly. Cheerfully because you don’t want to be surly about (even if it gets old), matter-of-factly because it’ll make it less awkward, and quickly because it gets more awkward if you let it go on for a while before correcting it.

Just a quick, “Oh, it’s actually Kaye! Miranda’s my last name. So let me show you the document you were asking about…”

4. Part-time former employee asked about a holiday bonus

One of my full-time employees quit last March and went to work for one of my competitors. However, she made arrangements to continue working for me on an on-call, as-needed basis. It is not ideal for me, but it has worked okay (not great, but okay) so far. Recently, she wrote to me asking if she would be receiving a bonus this holiday season. I was rather shocked and thought it was just plain rude. In the past, I have not always been able to do bonuses, but have done them if I could.

For this particular employee, she quit. Granted, she made arrangements to continue working for me, thereby negating the need for me to hire someone else full-time and instead paying only when I need her specific skills. But it is also a way for her to put extra money in her pocket, which I am sure was her main reason, as opposed to loyalty to me and my company. What is the etiquette regarding bonuses for on-call folks?

It’s very, very normal to only do bonuses for full-time staff, and you can simply explain to her that that’s your practice.

For what it’s worth, it sounds like you’re taking this pretty personally, and I’d try not to. She may be naive or inexperienced with how this normally works, or she may figure she has nothing to lose by asking. I doubt she means it as an F-you, and you shouldn’t take it that way.

(All that said, bonuses are fundamentally retention strategies. If you’re strongly motivated to retain her, there’s no reason you can’t consider one.)

5. Should we cross-train so we can take time off without interruption?

I work full-time as an administrator for an accounting firm. One of my coworkers and I each took over for people who retired after being here for many years.

It has become increasingly apparent to me that the administrators before us had gone above and beyond their job duties and somewhat “spoiled” the partners in the office we work in, even as far as being called back from holiday to take care of tasks the partners considered emergencies, but which could have been handled with a little forethought.

The problem is that there is nobody to cover our positions when we are gone. Would it be in our interest to teach each other the basics of our jobs so we can be free to have a vacation without an “emergency,” or would it be best to bring this up to our supervisor and see what happens? Is cross-training on the sly a good idea?

If you have the time to cross-train and your managers don’t object for some reason, then yes, definitely, it’s a great idea. But I don’t see any reason to do it on the down-low; presumably it’s going to come out eventually, and it’s even in your best interest to make it known that you’re able to cover for each other.

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…

1. My manager offered to take a pay cut so the rest of us can earn more

I work for a small nonprofit. It is common in our industry for there to be a big pay difference between the local manager and the rest of the staff. It is what it is, but at the same time, boards constantly bemoan how difficult it is to recruit and retain skilled staff.

At a recent general voter meeting, my manager said that she would be willing to take a pay cut to give some of those funds to other staff salaries. She did not give details as to how this would be done; it was sort of an invitation to the board to act upon. Everyone present was surprised by this statement. No action was taken in the meeting. I was touched by my manager’s willingness to sacrifice, and I also thought it was a positive, if not necessary, direction for pay equality to go in if we want to attract and keep quality staff.

I am in the minority of staff opinions on this. My coworkers who I’ve spoken with have all said they would not allow our manager to take a pay cut. I have mixed feelings: I’d really love a raise, and while I don’t believe the manager is grossly overpaid, I’m perfectly happy to let her “take one for the team.” We have an upcoming staff meeting where an agenda item is “staff salaries,” and I think I will struggle with the conversation that takes place.

Am I being selfish in my willingness to stand by while my manager sacrifices? Should I try to speak up in favor of her doing this, or just keep quiet and let the chips fall where they may?

I think that if your manager is willing to do this, it’s not really your place to try to talk her out of it. She’s a professional adult, and she can figure out for herself if it’s something she feels good about doing and if the change would be sustainable for her in the long-run. It’s possible that she’s looking at salaries across the organization and seeing an opportunity to make pay fairer.

That said, her willingness aside, taking her up on it wouldn’t necessarily be a smart move for the organization. If she’s being paid a fair market rate right now and she gives some of that up, what’s going to happen when she leaves the organization at some point? Are they going to have to lower the salaries that her pay cut previously let them raise? Or just have to struggle to attract good candidates for her role with the lower salary? And would this move create a situation where she’s earning less than her peers, who all happen to be a different sex or race,  which could cause a separate set of issues? All of that is reason for whoever will make the final call on this to tread really carefully.

2. Can I rescind my job recommendation of an ex?

I recommended an ex-lover/friend for a position at my company. I was mostly prompted by a generous $5,000 bonus, and I really wanted him to move to my city.

This guy never treated me well, but I of course was blinded by love. I’ve since separated myself from him and now I’m regretting the recommendation. I do think he is qualified for the job, but I don’t want him being there to affect me at work. We are a relatively small company of about 250 people all in one huge room, and I’d probably see him in passing every day. My team does interact with the team he would be working on from time to time. I really like my job and I don’t intended to leave my current position anytime soon.

Now I realize that my recommendation was a mistake, and I asked he not take the position before he interviewed. He is very poor and has had a difficult time finding a job after graduating in May. When I spoke with him about it, he said that if it’s the only job he gets, he has to take it.

Is it possible for me to rescind my recommendation or explain the situation to the hiring manager? Will it make me look bad? I really like my job and I don’t want to it to be ruined for me. (In addition to my personal reasons, he informed me that he cheated during the given coding test. For one of the answers, he told me he googled the question and copied and pasted the answer. This would be what I tell my boss when I rescind my recommendation.)

Ooooh. It depends on how big of a deal him googling that answer was. On some tests, doing that would be fine; being able to quickly locate the right information would be just as good as already knowing it. If this really was cheating, though, then yeah, you could let your manager know, and say that you don’t feel comfortable recommending him as a result. But it’s kind of tough to “rescind” a recommendation beyond that; the assumption is that you thought it through when you gave the initial recommendation, and you’d really need additional information that’s come to light since then.

It’s also kind of crappy, I think, to do to a friend who’s already invested time in a hiring process. I think at this point I’d just let it play out, unless the cheating really was cheating, given the context.

3. Should I tell an employee the reason I’m firing him?

I manage employees who start with a three-month probationary period. I have a current probationary employee who has not taken direction well, has acted defensively and challenged basic instructions about how to do his job, has literally rolled his eyes when provided with feedback on how to do certain tasks, and ironically who has also sought me out for instructions in situations where the course of action for him to take should have been immediately obvious.

I intend to hire a replacement and terminate this employee near the end of his probationary period. I would like to give him feedback on the reason for letting him go, for a variety of reasons. From an ethical and professional standpoint, the feedback would be to his benefit, regardless of whether he realizes or appreciates that. And since he’ll inevitable ask why he is being terminated, if I do not disclose this, I feel he will be more resentful and frustrated and will make uncharitable assumptions as to my reasoning.

My boss, however, does not believe I should disclose any reasoning to the employee, since probationary employees can be let go for any reason, and my boss feels that my rationale for terminating him is inherently subjective and will inevitably lead to an argument. I do not intend to partake in an argument and believe I should simply outline my rationale and refuse to engage the employee in any debate if he pushes back. How do you think this should be handled?

You should absolutely tell him. It’s cruel to let someone go and refuse to tell him why, it sounds terrible to other employees who hear about it, and it’s exactly the sort of thing that creates bad will — much more so than if you’re straightforward with him about the reasons.

Not only that, but if you haven’t given him feedback on the issues you’re seeing, ideally you’d do that now so that he’s not blindsided when you do let him go. (I can totally get deciding that you’re not going to change your mind — I would too, if someone had an attitude like what you’ve described — but firings generally go more smoothly when they’re not the first time the employee is even hearing that there are problems.)

And last, you also don’t need to wait until the end of his probationary period. If you’ve already made up your mind, it’s kinder to him and more efficient for you to cut the cord now. It doesn’t make sense for either of you to keep investing in training him when the end is a foregone conclusion.

But even if you ignore me on that, yes, tell him why when you let him go.

4. Recruiter called earlier than scheduled and I didn’t pick up

I had a phone interview scheduled for 11:30 a.m., but the recruiter called at 11 a.m. I was on the phone with a student loan company when she called, but the loan company wouldn’t let me go, even after I told them that I had a very important phone call on the other line. They kept talking and the recruiter hung up on the other line. I immediately emailed the recruiter, apologizing for the inconvenience I caused, and asked if I could reschedule the interview. My question is, have I failed the phone interview before it even started?

Well, first, you didn’t cause any inconvenience. The recruiter called you half an hour early and you were busy with something else. You’re not required to remain free for the whole day just because an employer might call later or earlier than scheduled. So please don’t apologize to them for that, or see it as something you did wrong

It’s possible that they’re not going to reschedule with you, because that’s how some inconsiderate recruiters operate. (And in this case, I’m worried that the wording of your email made them think it was a mistake on your end, when in fact it wasn’t.) But all you can really do is see if they reach back out.

As an aside, no one can force you to stay on the phone. When you told the loan company that you needed to hang up and they refused to allow it, you could have said, “I’ll need to call you back, goodbye,” and hung up. Again, you’re not at fault for not doing this — but I also don’t want you thinking that people can trap you on calls that you don’t want to be on.

5. I lied on a job application and my offer was pulled

I’ve been working at a job for about three months now. Between having a new baby and the hours, I’ve come to the conclusion that it’s not for me. I applied for a new job, and I got an interview. But since at the time I applied, I had only been at my new job for a short time and I didn’t want to have a gap in employment or come across as job jumping, for my current job I listed my last job prior to here, which I had been at for over two years.

When the HR person did a background check, they saw I had left in July, which at time of interview was about two months before. Now they have basically taken away the potential job offer. I know it probably wasn’t the best option, but is there any way I could still get the job or is it a lost cause and I should just move on and deal with the current bad job until I find something else?

It’s very unlikely that there’s any way to salvage it. You lied about your employment and said you were still working at a job you’d left a couple of months before. That’s going to be a pretty big red flag about integrity; employers generally don’t want to hire someone who lies about that sort of thing, because they assume that you’re not trustworthy and will lie about other things too. I’d write this off, and take it as a useful lesson for future applications.