update: I didn’t check references on a new hire and he’s struggling — should I check them now? by Alison Green on August 21, 2015 Remember the letter-writer who was wondering whether she should go back and check the references of a struggling new hire? Here’s the update. Last month, I wrote to you regarding issues with a new employee we had hired on our team this past spring. He was officially let go last week. He was given more time to begin improving but failed to follow through. The day after I gave him a written warning and spoke to him regarding his conduct on the job and work ethic, he continued with the same errors, which led to him having another discussion, but with the other manager on our team. He made a simple error on a report that, if sent to the client, would have resulted in the client freaking out. That gut feeling that I had about his work ethic at other gigs? Well, he let the cat out of the bag during their talk. He emotionally stated that he exhibited the same behavior at his previous internship and the ones before. He also went on to say that his behavior was an issue he’s been dealing with for a long time. He never mentioned that he had worked on improving these behaviors. In the end, we had enough documented evidence that HR decided it was best not to do a performance improvement plan since he was not improving during the flex time we gave him. This has been a lesson for me and hopefully everyone else who was involved. If we are able to fill the position, my plan is to request that my teammate and I contact primary and secondary references so that we will have an idea whether a future candidate is suitable for the role on our team. Thanks again for your advice! You may also like:my employee helped a fired coworker get a job with her fiance and lied to me about itwe've heard rumors that our incoming new boss is a nightmaremy new employee keeps tagging us in negative social media posts after we've told her to stop { 139 comments }
how to replace an employee who doesn’t know she’s being fired by Alison Green on August 21, 2015 A reader writes: Do you have any advice on replacing a current employee before they know they are being replaced, when that employee is HR? In a small company with one HR person, we certainly can’t place an ad — and we want to have viable candidates before this person is let go. This is due to serious performance issues which have been addressed, time and again, yet continue. I am the one picking up the slack for what isn’t being done and am now involved in the replacement process. The one HR professional I knew who was on the market got a job 15 days before I was asked to see if she was interested. That exhausted all our personal connections — such as they were. This can’t be uncommon, but it’s really hard to find anything written about this. You can read my answer to this question over at Inc. today, where I’m revisiting letters that have been buried in the archives here from years ago (and often updating/expanding my answers to them). You may also like:my company advertises every job all the time to make sure we know we can be replacedemployee said she was leaving and has been replaced, but now doesn't know when she is going to leavemy employee isn't doing her job -- but I think she's in an abusive relationship { 55 comments }
open thread – August 21, 2015 by Alison Green on August 21, 2015 It’s the Friday open thread! The comment section on this post is open for discussion with other readers on anything work-related that you want to talk about. If you want an answer from me, emailing me is still your best bet*, but this is a chance to talk to other readers. * If you submitted a question to me recently, please don’t repost it here, as it may be in the to-be-answered queue :) You may also like:our new phones have fewer speed dial buttons and everyone is freaking outhow do I interrupt my boss in person when I need something?I walked in on the company owner having sex in his office { 1,775 comments }
my employer wants us to all endorse their services on LinkedIn, emailing an interviewer late at night, and more by Alison Green on August 21, 2015 It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. My employer wants us to all endorse their services on LinkedIn I have a question regarding my options to resist my employer’s requests that all staff “endorse” some of their services on my personal LinkedIn profile. My company, a government contractor, is marketing some services they are offering for purchase. As a major component of the marketing campaign, they are requesting that all staff “like” the blurb or share it on their LinkedIn accounts. Senior managers, including the executive director, are sending emails directing staff to share the announcements and they have made it clear that they expect us to comply. Are there any legal restrictions to employers requiring their staff to endorse them on their private LinkedIn or other social media accounts? I have looked at the local laws (my employer is based in Virginia), and LinkedIn’s Terms of Service but don’t see any specific prohibition of employers requiring staff to use their personal social media such as LinkedIn for their employer’s purposes. I did see that the FTC has created guidelines that require individuals disclose their association for such endorsements. Are there any legal stipulations or guidance that I can use to back up my position? I see my personal LinkedIn profile and network (I use only the basic free version of LinkedIn) as my personal network and I do not appreciate any pressure let alone an expectation that my professional network is viewed as my employer’s to exploit for their purposes and profit. The FTC rules apply to paid promotions; I doubt that simply “liking” something or sharing information from your employer would fall under that. It’s not uncommon for employers to request this sort of thing (although it’s certainly annoying, and also not especially effective if people are being forced into rather than giving a genuine, sincere endorsement). If you can get away with just “liking” it, do that — that’s pretty low-touch. If you absolutely have to share a blurb, you can (a) roll your eyes and do it, (b) do it but only send it to a very limited audience, or (c) decline to do it, perhaps explaining that your contacts have made it clear that they’re hostile to that kind of thing and it would do more harm than good. 2. Does it look bad to email a hiring manager late at night? Does it matter when and what time you email a follow-up letter or thank-you letter after an interview? I am a night owl and I had a phone interview on Friday and I did not get home until late. When I got home, I sent the thank-you letter to the hiring manager. Would they care it was sent at 3 a.m. on Friday night/Saturday morning or should I have waited until Monday morning/afternoon to send it? Don’t worry about it. You can always find someone who does hiring who has some weird bias against pretty much anything you can think of, but the vast majority of hiring managers will not care about this at all. 3. My old boss told my friend about an issue in my personnel file An old boss of mine (Boss A) randomly introduced himself to a close friend of mine at a coffee shop, not knowing that she was friends with me of course. Through their conversation, they realized that they had a common contact (me). A little while later, another former boss of mine (Boss B) showed up to have coffee with Boss A, and got involved in the conversation. My friend said that Boss A had nothing but positive things to say about me, but Boss B mentioned an HR issue that involved a serious conflict between me and another person at Boss B’s company. This conflict was physical on the other employee’s end, resulting in me filing a complaint with HR. My friend stated that Boss B said, “Oh yeah, Jane got into a cat fight with another person before she left.” Is it legal for Boss B to volunteer issues in my personnel file to random people in coffee shops? My friend has never had any affiliation with Boss B’s company, nor was she conducting a reference check or an employment verification. I understand that information in my personnel file is fair game to certain people in specific circumstances such as the ones mentioned above, but I think that Boss B may have crossed a legal line somewhere. It certainly makes me wonder what else Boss B has volunteered to random people on the street that just happen to know me. Yes, it’s legal. Indiscreet, but legal. The exception would be if the information was false and demonstrably injured your reputation (meaning that you lost work, were ostracized by friends or neighbors, or suffered other clear harm), which could potentially be defamation, but that’s likely not the case here. 4. My coworker is asking my manager about my maternity leave plan, not me I recently found out that a coworker, who I do not report to, has met with our supervisor on three separate occasions to inquire how my supervisor plans to cover my upcoming maternity leave. This coworker has not come to discuss the issue with me or ask if my supervisor and I have developed a plan. I work in a very tight-knit office of about 12 people, although the company is owned by a large, well-known corporation. Our office has a mutually distrustful relationship with the parent company, and our supervisor is known for not dealing with issues – so my coworker’s concern that something would fall through the cracks is not unfounded. However, first of all, I was hurt that she wouldn’t come to discuss this with me if she is concerned about how my projects will be covered while I am out for 6-8 weeks on short-term disability. But the bigger issue here is that I feel like my privacy was violated. I have been in discussion with HR and my supervisor about my maternity leave (which will begin around Thanksgiving), and have in fact been developing a plan for how my projects will be covered. I told my coworker that I would prefer she discuss any concerns about my leave with me personally. However, she really seemed surprised and unconvinced that she had overstepped. Is is appropriate for my coworker to meet with my supervisor to discuss my leave? How should I handle this if it comes up again? I don’t think it’s outrageously inappropriate for her to ask your manager about it; after all, your manager is the one who’s going to be ultimately responsible for ensuring that things run smoothly while you’re away, and it’s not like your leave plan is sensitive or confidential information. But it’s not unreasonable for you to ask her to start by speaking with you about it, particularly since hearing her questions and concerns might be useful input to think about while you’re still in the midst of putting together a coverage plan. 5. Telling employees to secure their valuables at the end of the day I’m not sure how to ask employees to secure their valuables at the end of the day without calling attention to our new cleaning crew that may be stealing stuff off employees’ desks. (Things have been disappearing.) I also know that a lot of times, the cleaning crew gets blamed for this stuff erroneously. I’d say something about it without naming any suspects: “Please be vigilant about securing any valuables when you leave your desk. Some items have disappeared recently, and while we’re not sure at this point what may have happened, while we look into it I want to ensure nothing else goes missing.” You may also like:how should I navigate social media connections during a job search?I google my coworkers -- is that weird?getting a rejection email on Christmas, manager suggested I take antidepressants, and more { 213 comments }
job candidate is triggering an etiquette land mine with appointment self-scheduling by Alison Green on August 20, 2015 A reader writes: I recruit for a number of positions for my organization, and I’ve started using a free online calendaring tool to let candidates see open blocks on my calendar and book times that work for them. It’s a bit less personal, but saves a ton of time on email back-and-forth since all I do is send them the link with a short note expressing my interest in a phone interview. I have a candidate with a strong resume and personalized cover letter who has used this booking tool to reschedule our interview five times—twice within a few hours of our scheduled appointment—without so much as a quick email of explanation. I think this is obnoxious and unprofessional… and just weird! If we were emailing back forth, I can’t imagine anyone doing this; does she think that because it’s an online booking system, there’s not a person on the other end? I’m no longer interested in speaking with her, but want to confirm I’m not off-base in canceling our interview on account of this behavior? And if not, should I simply say I’m no longer available to speak with her, or should I gently point out that her behavior is really unprofessional? I simply can’t imagine what makes her think this is OK, so part of me wonders if she actually doesn’t get it! Oooooh, yeah, that would bug me too. You’ve set that time aside and not booked it for other things, and she’s being cavalier about your time. For all she knows, you weren’t able to schedule another important meeting that day because you were honoring your appointment with her, or you turned down a dinner invitation with a friend because you had a 6 p.m. call scheduled with her. The fact that it’s technologically easy for her to reschedule doesn’t negate the fact that it has as much of an impact on your schedule as if it were all done the old-fashioned way. I think you’re right that if she had to actually contact you each time, there’s no way she’d try to reschedule five times, and that the technology — and the fact that it feels more impersonal — is lulling her into not realizing that this isn’t that much different. I’m torn on whether I’d cancel the interview altogether though. I’d be more likely to if the role required polish and sophistication in dealing with people, or technological savviness. If it didn’t require either of those things, I’d probably just send her a note that said, “I noticed you’ve rescheduled our interview five times. Can you confirm that you’ll be able to keep the current time you’ve scheduled?” (I’d be tempted to add on “it’s causing havoc with my schedule,” but I actually think it’s better to leave that off and see what kind of response you get from a less heavy-handed nudge.) If you do decide to cancel, I think it’s a kindness to tell her why. In that case, I’d say something like, “I noticed you’ve rescheduled our interview five times. It’s upended my scheduling a few times, and I think at this point we should cancel the call, but thank you for your interest and best of luck in your search.” (As a random side note, I know some people hate “best of luck in your search,” but I find it a useful phrase that allows you a reasonably soft ending to an email like this.) You may also like:interview candidates have stopped giving me their availability when I ask for itcandidate showed up in-person for a Zoom interview "to demonstrate their interest"should interviewers give job candidates a way to contact them? { 269 comments }
how to push a project forward when you don’t have any authority by Alison Green on August 20, 2015 You’re charged with getting a project completed that’s going to rely on people who you don’t have real authority over – and who of course have their own priorities and deadlines to contend with. Here’s how to get what you need to keep your project on track when you don’t have the authority to say “I must have this from you by Friday.” Invest in developing relationships. Developing good working relationships with colleagues when you’re not asking for anything will usually help you get when you need when you areasking for something. People’s whose working style is very task-oriented (as opposed to relationship-oriented) often feel frustrated by this reality, wondering why their coworkers shouldn’t be expected to do their jobs regardless of relationships. But the reality is that “doing their jobs” isn’t always black and white; there can be a lot of grey that goes into how someone prioritizes your request, whether they’re willing to go above and beyond to expedite something for you, and generally how eager they are to help when they also have plenty of other competing priorities. For most jobs, relationships matter, and they’re worth investing in. That also includes… Be thoughtful about how people like to be treated. If you honor your colleagues’ contributions to your projects, share how their support helped you meet your goals, and are a good partner to them yourself when they need your assistance, you’re much more likely to cultivate their good will and have them interested in helping you out. Always, always explain the context for what you’re asking. People are often much more inclined to be helpful if they understand what’s behind your request. If you simply say, “I need copies of all your Jones files by Friday,” a busy coworker may not prioritize your request or may even bristle. But if you say, “We need to provide copies of the Jones files to the auditor by Friday or we risk failing the audit,” your coworker is much more likely to get you what you need, and at the pace you need it by. Make it easy for the other person to help. When you’re asking someone for help, the easier you make it on them, the more likely you are to get what you need by when you need it. So, for instance, if you’re an email person but you know your coworker prefers talking in person, cast aside your own preferences and go talk with her in person for the duration of your project. Or if you need information from someone, provide a template with the fields you need so they just need to fill it in. Whatever you can do to make it easier on them will up your chances of getting it more quickly. Check in regularly. When you don’t have formal authority, it’s easy to make the mistake of assuming that work someone agreed to take on is progressing according to plan – they agreed, after all! But precisely because you don’t have formal authority, your work might be the first thing they push aside when more pressing priorities come up. That means that it’s crucial to find ways to check in as the work is moving forward, so that you can spot slowdowns or adjust your plan if needed. Don’t be annoying about this, of course – but it’s reasonable to touch base both formally and informally over the course of a project, rather than just waiting for the end and hoping everything got done. Be willing to “borrow authority” if you need to. Ideally, you wouldn’t need to invoke your boss or the COO, but if you’re not getting what you need and you’ve been empowered to ensure it happens, you may at some point need to say, “Jane asked me to ensure we had this piece of the work from your team by Tuesday.” I originally published this at Intuit QuickBase’s blog. You may also like:advice for first-time managersour new entry-level coworker thinks he's our bossare remote workers more likely to be laid off? { 28 comments }
when your employer catches you forging a doctor’s note to get out of work by Alison Green on August 20, 2015 A reader writes: I’m asking this question on behalf of my boyfriend, who is dealing with a complicated situation at work. In the beginning of June, he verbally discussed some taking time off in mid-July with his boss several times. He got confirmation that it would be fine, but nothing was in writing. His PTO time didn’t renew until July 1st, so he knew the request would be denied if he submitted the official request for time off before that date. He submitted a time off form on July 2nd for time off starting on July 9th. The official request as denied because there wasn’t two weeks notice. My boyfriend was upset about this because he had already purchased a flight to Cuba based on the verbal confirmation from his boss. There was no refund available for the travel arrangements available to him. I don’t think the job was aware he was traveling out of the country. My boyfriend decided to tell his job that he was having a medical procedure done and that it was medically necessary for him to have those days off. He presented a fake doctor’s note and they agreed to let him take the time off. He goes to Cuba for a week, and upon his return, they request a note stating that he’s medically ok to come back to work. From what he told me, his boss and manager were both very skeptical of his story for a few of reasons, but they couldn’t prove anything initially. They called a meeting with him and the HR department and asked if there was anything he wanted to tell them about the medical note, and he told them he had nothing to say regarding it. They brought up a few issues and asked him to address them. First, he didn’t mention a medical reason until after they denied his time off request. Second, they tried to reach him for quick questions about clients during the time off and couldn’t. Third, they called the medical office to verify his note, and the doctor denied even knowing he was a patient. My boyfriend was subsequently fired for falsifying documents on his second day back at work after the trip. He claims that his HIPAA rights were violated because there is a law saying that the employer must have authorization from the employee before attempting to verify a medical note. I work in the medical field, and I told him that HIPAA doesn’t apply to him because at the end of the day, he actually isn’t a patient of the medical facility. I’m not sure if there is some other law applicable to employers and employees regarding medical notes, time off, etc. For the record, I told him not to create a fake note and to just eat the financial loss on the travel arrangements, but he didn’t listen. In addition, he has been putting in hours towards a certification for his field and will lose three years worth of time if the employer doesn’t certify that he put that time in. He has contacted his lawyer, who advised him to apply for unemployment benefits, and that if the job denies them, he can then go to a hearing to try and claim that the employer was in error by reaching out to the medical provider without his authorization. I told him to just cut his losses and give up on going back to work there. At the most, he might be able to get his hours certificate back and negotiate what will be said to future employers seeking a reference. What do you think, Alison and readers? You are correct. As far as I know, simply attempting to verify the authenticity of the note doesn’t violate any laws. (It’s possible that the doctor’s office erred in confirming that he wasn’t a patient there, but that’s on them — not on the employer.) He’s also raising the specter of HIPAA here, but as you correctly note, HIPAA would apply to the medical office but not to apply to his employer. More importantly, though, why is he even going in that direction? He forged a note, and he’s going on the attack? He got caught forging a medical document. The only reasonable course of action here is for him is to realize that he did something incredibly unethical and lacking in integrity, something that any employer would consider a no-brainer firing offense, and to slink off quietly and vow never to do anything like that again. I’m sure you know this, but he’s making himself very unsympathetic here. Forging a doctor’s note isn’t smart or ethical, but fine, he messed up. But he’s making himself look so much worse by not accepting responsibility for the situation and by trying to push some of the blame on to others. This is his mess — he’s the one who really screwed up here. By not facing up to that, he’s coming across so much more terribly than he otherwise would. (Don’t get me wrong; forging the note was pretty bad and his employer didn’t have any choice but to fire him for it. But it could have been a momentary lapse in judgment. What he’s doing now says something much deeper about his character.) From a practical standpoint, if he tries to go on the attack, it’s going to destroy any remaining good will that anyone at his company might have had for him. If his former employer was feeling willing to verify the hours for his certification and/or to negotiate a decent or at least neutral reference, they’re really unlikely to be willing to do that if he tries to turn this around as something they did wrong. The best thing he can to is admit full responsibility and stop trying to accuse them of anything. He forged a note, he got caught, and the more he fights that, the worse he looks. You may also like:how to write the perfect out-of-office messagegovernor yanked telework for state employees and my office is in chaoscoworker is obviously pregnant but hasn't told us, negotiating for more vacation time, and more { 635 comments }
marketing department uses everyone’s photo but mine, I might have been demoted, and more by Alison Green on August 20, 2015 It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go… 1. Our marketing department uses everyone’s photo but mine I’ve been with my current employer for over 14 months. Our staff directory has photographs of every employee (about 35 in our branch) and it’s a useful tool for other branches to see who we are. We also use the photos in our marketing materials, proposals, and RFPs. Mine is the only listing without a photograph, and it’s been that way through several updates over the past year because the marketing rep has scheduled informal photo sessions when I’ve been on vacation (twice) or in training or meetings. She has emailed me that she’d schedule time to take my picture but has never done so, despite me indicating when my schedule is open. She just released the newest version of the directory with several new employees (one of whom just started last week) and again, everyone has a photograph but me. I’m a little unhappy about it for several reasons: I would like my customers and vendor reps to grow familiar with who I am so I’m not just a voice on the phone or a name on an email. Having my photo included would help me feel more part of our team – I currently work in the back corner of our office and I’m often overlooked when my managers walk around greeting the team. We have a new employee who will soon need her photo taken, so I emailed the marketing rep to let her know I’d like to be included in the next photo session. She has not responded. I’d assume she’s super busy but she’s often just standing around chatting. It only takes a few seconds to take a photograph to at least have on hand the next time she edits the directory. What’s the most professional way to approach this? Go by her office and say this: “Hi Jane. Is now a good time to take my photo?” If she says no, say, “We’ve had so much trouble scheduling this that I want to nail down a time. Can you look at your calendar right now and we’ll schedule something for in the next week?” If that doesn’t work, could you just provide your own photo? But it’s hard for me to think that’s she’s going to be able to continue resisting when you’re standing right there, handling it reasonably. (The interesting question, of course, is what’s at the root of this. It could genuinely be laziness or disorganization on her part, or it could be some weird issue she has with you. In any case, unless she has some sort of demonic grudge against you, this should work. And if she does have a demonic grudge, please write back and we’ll address that.) Read an update to this letter here. 2. Have I been demoted? I think I got demoted yesterday. I’m not sure exactly if that’s it, because nobody told me directly. Instead, there was a group meeting with me and the two temps I hired a few months ago. Our office manager extended their contracts in one breath and said “You all report to me; it’s a flat hierarchy from now on.” They’ve been assigned new tasks and a lot of the work that was solely on my shoulders is now parcelled out. That would be great, in theory, if the manager had asked me first. I would’ve told her that they are probably not going to be great at the tasks she’s assigned, and that delegation would’ve worked better in a different way. Also, you know, it hurts, finding out someone has ripped the rug out from under you without so much as a by-your-leave. Am I being elbowed out gracelessly? Insultingly? Is she just incompetent? Am I part of an office war? What’s the proactive thing to do – should I suggest new projects for myself to take on, complain to my other “bosses”? (Long story, but I might have advocates, unless they’re the ones who told her to treat me like garbage.) Enjoy my new free time? Go talk to your boss and ask. I’d say this: “Can you tell me what made you decide to switch Jane and Fergus over to reporting to you and assign them X, Y, and Z rather than have me continue to do that work?” Pause there and listen. It might be that she has an explanation that has nothing to do with you (like that she’s gearing up to have you focus on some other big project), who knows. But if you feel like you’re still left unsure, say this: “I have to admit, it makes me worry that you had concerns about how I was managing them or how well I was doing with XYZ. If that’s the case, I’d be grateful to know so that I can improve.” 3. Emailing the office about a medical issue I’m wondering if you have input on this. I’m pregnant, about 5 months, and my belly is noticeable at this point. Coworkers will ask how things are going for me, my husband, the baby, in a friendly way. Unfortunately, we have recently discovered the baby has a congenital heart defect that will require open heart surgery shortly after birth, followed by weeks in the NICU. She might end up being largely okay after recovery, or she might die. My small team knows because I had to keep leaving work for unexpected doctor’s appointments recently. I’m the sort of person who likes to be open about things and prefers to answer even casual “how are you”s honestly when possible. It makes me feel bad when people are asking how things are and I basically say “fine” just to avoid getting into it. My actual question: I’m considering sending an office-wide email explaining the situation. I don’t mind people knowing, and quite frankly it would make it easier on me for people to know the context before asking how the baby is. Does this seem reasonable? Is this really just TMI? Is there some in-person response that might work better on an individual basis? My office doesn’t use the office-wide list for very much – mostly announcements from the CEO, or about office-wide official events. I’ve never even seen a “hey, there are brownies in the kitchen” go out, much less something more personal. Normally how people will use office-wide email depends on the culture (as well as the size of the office), but this is the kind of thing where even if it’s not normally done, no reasonable person would have an issue with this. I don’t think it’s TMI, and you could even explain that you’re saying it because people are kindly asking you how the baby is, and it’s easier to tell everyone what’s going on up-front. Alternately, as commenters have suggested, you could ask your manager or a trusted colleague to share the news with people in face-to-face conversations on your behalf. Good luck, and I think lots of us will be keeping you and your baby in our thoughts. Read an update to this letter here. 4. Applying at a company whose culture was just eviscerated in a high-profile article I’ve had a phone interview and completed several writing exercises for a position in the corporate office of a very famous company in my area (I’ve tried to take out as many identifying details as possible, but I’m sure your readers won’t have any trouble guessing which one). Recently, an expose of the brutal corporate culture was published in a major newspaper, and the company’s treatment of its workers has made headlines across the country. The article highlighted the long hours, the pressure to always be reachable by phone and email, the constant competition, and more. I have friends who work there who’ve said that the culture can be difficult at times, but they seem to enjoy their jobs. If I did get this job, even if I only stayed in it for a year, it would make me a very attractive candidate for other positions. I would also be working for a department that wasn’t specifically mentioned in the article, and it’s possible that the culture there is different. But if the article is accurate, it’s definitely not a job I would take. I have a sick relative who I might need to visit on short notice (the article profiles several employees who were written up or fired for spending too much time with their families), I have a health problem that gets worse with stress (quite a few former employees were managed out for having health problems), and I have a rewarding hobby that I’d rather not drop (and I certainly couldn’t keep it up with the 80-hour weeks described in the article). If I move forward in the interview process, how can I bring up these concerns? The article went into some detail about this company’s problems with hiring and retaining enough employees, and I’m afraid that even if I try to talk about the corporate culture, I might not get an honest answer because the department is so desperate for more help and the company strongly encourages hiring managers to stick to the party line. How can I get a realistic sense of what working there is like? Should I bring up the article? If I don’t, it’s going to be the elephant in the room. But this article might also pressure the company into making some changes in the way it treats its employees, and I don’t want to miss out on a great opportunity if the corporate culture does change. Assuming we’re talking about Amazon, you already know what the culture is like; that article filled you in pretty well, and it sounds like your friends who worked there have confirmed it’s not terribly off-base. (Is that last part right? I wasn’t 100% sure from your letter, but I’m going to assume it is.*) I’m not really sure what you’d gain by raising it in an interview; your friends, after all, have far more incentive to be candid with you than an interviewer who doesn’t know you and is trying to fill a job. It’s possible the article will result in some changes there, but that’s going to take a long time to know for sure (culture change is hard and takes a long time), and there’s nothing an interviewer could tell you right now that would be a certainty on that front. Your safest bet is to assume the article is true and decide whether you’re up for what it described. (Here’s the Cliff Notes version of the article about Amazon for anyone who doesn’t want to read the whole thing.) * If I’m wrong about what your friends who work there told you, that changes the answer. I’d put a lot of weight on what you hear from them. If you’re not certain exactly where they come down on it, go back and talk with them some more. 5. References when my past managers are no longer with the company we worked at together The managers with the companies I was employed with have either resigned or quit. Is it okay if I put down the recruiter’s info or the current managers working at the job site I was last employed at? Usually reference-checkers will want to talk with someone who actually managed you, so the new manager at the site won’t be useful if they didn’t work with you. You can provide the company’s contact info for general employment verification, but for actual references, you’ll want to supply people who managed you. Ideally, that means tracking down those former managers and providing their current contact info (LinkedIn can be a good source for this). You may also like:is it OK to look very different from your online photos?my boss excessively Photoshops herself on our company's social mediarequiring video during team meetings, telling someone we're not hiring them back, and more { 344 comments }
update: my coworker won’t stop caressing me — or the kids we work with by Alison Green on August 19, 2015 Remember the letter-writer whose coworker kept hugging and caressing everyone around her, including the kids they worked with, even after she was told to stop? Here’s the update. First, let me say that I was so grateful for all of the responses to reinforce that I wasn’t trying to make a mountain out of a molehill. It’s sometimes hard to be objective about a situation when you’re right in the middle of it, and you and the huge number of reader responses let me know that I wasn’t just overreacting. Kim’s inappropriate behavior wasn’t just limited to her excessive touchy-feely tendencies. As the leader of a group, she would frequently do things that were just plain unprofessional, not things you would expect an adult role model to do. She would disappear and the kids in her group would be without direct supervision for short amounts of time. I overheard her offering to give a program participant a ride home from an event at a venue about 45 minutes away; this is strictly prohibited by our organization and I know she was aware of this. I saw her engaging in horseplay with the kids (like swinging a child around or chasing children/playing keep-away) in a hazardous area where it would be easy to slip and fall. Administratively, she forgot to enter a team event for a major state competition…a really big deal. That’s just not something that can be forgotten, and it really hurts the kids when they can’t compete in the event they earned. (I caught it, luckily, and we were able to get the entry in after the deadline.) After yet another incident of her not being able to keep her hands off of one of the kids, I got frustrated and sent my supervisor an email outlining many of the incidents, asked why these things were STILL happening a full year after she started, even when she’d been told about the issues many times. I brought up how what she’s doing is an abuse grooming tactic, making the kids more susceptible to abuse in the future, and I said that just that is dangerous for the kids and our program, without even looking at anything else. I asked what I needed to do to get some definite action, and I offered to file a written complaint (an official one) because this has gone on long enough. Finally, my supervisor got the facility director involved. I met with him several days later and then again a week after that. He seemed to listen to what I was saying, and said that he spoke with Kim, although he couldn’t go into details because of confidentiality. We were nearing the end of the season, so I realistically knew nothing could be done in that short amount of time, but I was looking at how they would set things up for next season. Things were quiet until I followed up with him again in June, wondering about the program direction for the upcoming fall/winter season. We met in the earlier part of June, this time with my supervisor also in the meeting. My supervisor basically defended Kim wherever she could (partially, I think, to save face because I still had valid complaints about her behavior after more than a year). They were saying how I raised good points, and thanked me for bringing things to their attention, but were still talking about coaching and working with her. At that point, I sort of knew that they wouldn’t do anything to reassign her or get rid of her. My supervisor was still willing to give her chances despite being confronted with many, many accounts of where she was inappropriate with the children or was generally unprofessional over the course of more than a year. After this meeting, the director sent me an email saying that he would get back to me by a specific date in late June. He never did; I never heard from him again. I heard that Kim was still coaching there, and was pretty much in charge of their summer program. The lack of response from the director (or the supervisor) combined with the fact that Kim was still around pretty much sealed it in my mind….for whatever reason, they were willing to overlook ALL of her many issues to put up with her. I had a conversation with my supervisor yesterday, to finally put everything to bed. Her official line was that they did ‘internal investigations’ and that they felt that Kim was on a good track and that the issues had been resolved, so they would be keeping her on in the fall. They knew that I was not going to come back if they kept her in the same position, yet that’s the choice they made: they chose the employee who had been there for a year and a half, who was unprofessional, was physically inappropriate with staff and child program participants, had many complaints about her behavior during that short time and had actually caused people to leave the program, over the employee who had been there for seven years, was well-regarded and had a good reputation. A year ago, when our numbers were declining, my supervisor remarked to me that she hoped to leverage my good reputation, and use that to bring more people into our program. So it’s a real blow to me that despite that, they decided to keep Kim and allow me go; my seven good years apparently don’t count for anything. As I said in the original question, I feared that it would reach a point where I would have to leave because they wouldn’t do anything about Kim. I know it sounded strange. But sadly, that’s what ended up happening. I think it boiled down to the fact that no matter what was good for the program, they took the option where they wouldn’t have to do anything unpleasant or create more work for themselves. If they wanted me to stay, they would have to face the unpleasant task of dealing with Kim…either firing her or reassigning her. But if they kept Kim where she was, then I would quit and they wouldn’t have to do anything unpleasant. I’m sad to realize that all of my contributions over seven years were overlooked for a matter of mere convenience. Thanks again for publishing the letter originally. It really helped. You may also like:my coworker screams awful things at her kids during video callsmost popular posts of 2022my new boss needs constant reassurance { 254 comments }
my employee keeps sneaking out of work early by Alison Green on August 19, 2015 A reader writes: I’m a relatively new manager (4 months). I am coming from the position of teammate to most of the staff I manage, but they all seem to have adjusted well to my new role and respected my move from peer to manager. However, I seem to be having an issue with one of my employees regularly sneaking out 10-15 minutes early from work. I’ve started to catch on, and when I ask, the person says that she didn’t take her 15-minute break so that she could leave early (but if that’s the case, it needs to be arranged and agreed upon with me), then proceeds to talk my ear off about the weather and everything she did that day and then rushes out the door before I can get a word in edgewise. I feel that I should be more assertive, but I don’t know how to prove my point when this employee has basically found a loophole. I would be okay with this once in a while (and if we discussed it first), but I don’t like the sneakiness of it. You can read my answer to this question over at Inc. today, where I’m revisiting letters that have been buried in the archives here from years ago (and often updating/expanding my answers to them). You may also like:I'm in trouble for leaving for a business trip without a late coworkerwhen my office lets us out early before a holiday, why don't they tell us in advance?when can managers expect employees to adjust to the "new normal"? { 91 comments }