Ask a Manager

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…

1. An employee clique is causing problems

I’m a new manager who’s been internally promoted and taken over a team of 13 people, divided into two main cliques. There’s a group of the tenured employees and a group of the new employees, and they can’t seem to manage to intermingle.

I would love for this to be a non-issue, but unfortunately it’s often brought up in my weekly one-on-ones where the new employees mention they feel as though they’re stepping on the tenured employees’ toes. One even referred to the workplace as “pledging into a sorority.” The more tenured employees have negative attitudes about new processes that are rolled out, which affects the team’s momentum and growth. They question decisions made by leadership without presenting an alternate solution and have a sense of entitlement that’s caused a toxic environment for others. This is starting to be noticed by other employees outside my department and affect our ability to hit goals, and I’m starting to feel more like a therapist than a manager.

I’ve arranged buddy systems, team outings, and switched up seats/lunches but nobody is warming up. Any suggestions on how to squash this and make a cohesive team?

You’re seeing this as a social issue (and trying to solve it from that angle), but it’s not. It’s not about the longer-term employees needing to mingle with the newer employees; it’s about specific behaviors they’re displaying that are impacting your team’s work results — resisting new processes and generally naysaying and creating a negative environment. That’s the piece of this that you need to address, and you can’t do it through social engineering (buddy systems, outings, and switching seats). That’s like trying to solve a sore throat by putting a cast on your knee.

Instead, need to talk with the problem employees individually about the behaviors they’re displaying that are problematic, clearly tell them what you need to see from them instead, and then set and enforce consequences if the problems continue. You should be treating this like any other performance issue that was impacting the work.

2. Employer will pay me more if I work as a contractor

I was recently extended a job offer at $58k. I replied that I was hoping the salary would be more in line with something in the $62-$65k range. The employer responded that the salaries were not negotiable but that if I was willing to waive my benefits, they would have some wiggle room. I asked him to expand upon this, and he said that if I wanted to waive all benefits, including leave, and become a 1099 contractor, they could meet $65k. He said if I only waived health insurance could he offer $60k.

I’m a bit upset because my current employer is wonderful and has a great benefits package. They’ve also been upfront with me every step of the way. This new offer seems shady. What do you make of it?

They can’t just decide to make you a 1099 contractor without restructuring the job; there are legal restrictions on how contractors must be treated. (See more here.)

Moreover, contractors generally charge significantly more than employees, because they’re not receiving benefits and are responsible for paying their own payroll taxes. It’s very, very unlikely that a 12% increase in pay would make up for that; it’s more common for contractors to charge twice what an employee would, so you’d be taking a huge hit in your overall compensation.

3. I don’t want to tell my manager what I’m getting physical therapy for

I have a recently-diagnosed medical problem that requires me to get pelvic floor physical therapy once a week for at least 8 weeks or more. Because of the hours of my physical therapist, I may have to come in late to work each time I have therapy, which I will have to clear with my manager. My manager is both a great manager and an all-around nice guy, but because of this, I’m sure he’ll ask what’s wrong, and I feel strange saying something like “it’s a private medical issue that I’d rather not talk about,” because I feel like that makes it quite obvious what the problem is.

Is it wrong/could it backfire if I lie and say I’m getting physical therapy for some other less embarrassing body part, like my back or my knees? I feel funny about lying, but I’d really rather not talk about something so personal with any of my colleagues! I’m assuming that if I have to get a doctor’s note, it will be vague enough that it won’t “out” me. Could you see this causing issues for me later on if I lie?

You can say it’s physical therapy for a medical condition without going into details, or you can simply say it’s a “weekly medical appointment for the next eight weeks.” If asked what’s going on, you can say, “nothing too serious, just something I need to take care of.” Most people aren’t going to continue to push for details at that point, but if he does, you can say, “I’d rather not talk about the details, but I can definitely get a note from my doctor if you need it.” (I’m not a fan of doctor’s notes, but in this case offering one is a way of emphasizing “this is legit, just not something I want to discuss with you.”)

4. Listing my current internship as a reference when I’m applying with them as well

I am a graduate student and currently working at an internship for a small (less than 20 people) engineering company (company X). I enjoy my work there and the office environment, etc. I graduate with my MS in December and will be looking for full-time jobs starting in the next month or so.

I plan on applying at company X for a job, but also at other companies (Y and Z). I think it would be weird to ask my current boss for a job at company X and then have him get a call from a recruiter from company Y/Z a few days later. Should I check “yes” or “no” for “may we contact” when I list company X as a previous employer for the job applications at companies Y and Z? If no, how should I explain it? I also plan on listing one of my coworkers (I work with him on a daily basis) at company X (who knows I am interested in applying there) as a reference for the other jobs. Should I do this?

Your current company knows that you’re job searching (or at least they hope that you are; you’re in an internship, so it tends to be assumed that you’re working on lining something up for once it ends), so it’s not that weird to have them get reference calls from other employers. I’d still give your manager and the coworker you’re listing a heads-up out of politeness — just say something like, “As you know, I’m applying for a job here and would love to stay on, but I know that may not happen, so I’m also applying with other companies. Would you be comfortable being a reference for me?”

5. Should I send a thank-you after a rejection when I wasn’t interviewed?

I’m a somewhat-recent grad with a good job, but one that’s not really in my field, so I like to keep an eye on job postings. I applied to a job last week that was kind of a long shot, but I really loved the location and company. I received a rejection email today that stated that they would keep my resume for future opportunities. Like I said, it was long shot, but I really appreciated being notified and not left hanging.

My question is if it would be appropriate or annoying to send them a thank-you email? I never even interviewed with them, phone or otherwise, so I don’t want to come off as someone who crosses boundaries/is annoying/etc.

Sure, that’s fine to do. It certainly won’t come across as annoying. If it’s fairly generic (“thanks so much for letting me know; I really appreciate your time”), it’s just going to be neutral; it’ll neither help nor hurt. But if it’s more charming/interesting then that (more like this one), it has the potential to help your future chances.

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…

1. How can I make my coworkers understand my migraines?

I get migraines. I have for more than 20 years. I usually get one a month, but occasionally they come in clusters and I’ll have a week or two getting them on and off. I see a neurologist and am on prescription medication, so I am doing what I can to mitigate the problem.

I understand that when I get them and have to go home for the day, this can affect the people I work with. I also understand that when I’m fully dosed on my meds, I get very foggy and this can seriously affect my work.

I tend to hover between an overly-apologetic attitude and one that’s more akin to “Give me a break. This is a medical condition, and I’m dealing the best I can.” I don’t like the idea of apologizing too much, because there are plenty of people I’ve encountered (and reported to) that think of migraines as “bad headaches” (the same way people who feel sad, might say they are “depressed”). But I also don’t want to come off as cavalier, like I don’t care that my illness makes things more difficult for them. It does. This sucks for everyone.

What’s the best stance I can take that will let people know that yes, when I leave in the middle of the day holding my head (and likely holding back tears) it’s not to go home, kick back, and relax, while still letting them know that I want to be a good employee and coworker? How do I phrase this discussion? Also, how can I let them know that although I will try to be especially careful when I’m foggy from my medication, there is a higher probability of mistakes, and to please bear with me?

When people cover for you, it makes sense to thank them — but you don’t need to go overboard. I’d explain the broader situation to people one time (“I get debilitating migraines that I’m working with a doctor to treat, but we don’t have them under control yet and at times they can be excruciating”), and say thanks after they do something specific to cover for you, but beyond that, I think you should assume people will be reasonable and understanding. If you encounter a specific problem with someone (like someone rolling their eyes or making comments about you being out), that would be something to address head-on, but absent that kind of thing, I’d give your coworkers the benefit of the doubt.

With your manager, I’d probably be more detailed, particularly around the medication side effects, since it’s important that she has as full a picture as you’re comfortable giving of what you’re dealing with. But again, I’d handle it as a one-time conversation, framed as “here’s the situation, I’m working to resolve it, until then it’s probably realistic to expect occasional sick days and occasional fogginess, and please let me know if this raises any concerns for you, now or in the future.”

2. Job offer was rescinded — after resigning current job

My husband was offered a job on July 17. Well, today he received an email that said “Please see attachment” from his would-be new employer. He opened the attachment and it was a rescinding letter. No reason why, no call from the company, nothing. He called the woman he had been speaking to and she said that she “isn’t at liberty to say” why they are rescinding the offer letter. Meanwhile, he has already put in his two weeks notice at his current job. He asked them if he could stay and they said it is too late. They already told people he was leaving and whatnot. So now he is out of both jobs.

Is there anything he can do? He was supposed to get a $1,000 sign on bonus. Could he still get that seeing that he did sign on? If so, how would we even go about doing so?

That’s horrible. There are (very rare) situations where an employer needs to rescind a job offer, but if that happens, they owe you a clear explanation, a massive apology, and ideally severance payments — not an appallingly cold “please see attachment” email.

That said, rescinding a job offer is generally legal unless the employer operated with deliberate fraudulent intent. There is a legal concept called “detrimental reliance,” where your husband could argue that he relied on this offer to his detriment … but courts generally haven’t sided with those claims (partly because since employment is usually at-will, he could have been fired on his first day without legal recourse anyway).

In any case, he should spell out to them exactly the situation they put him in and ask for some sort of restitution and see what happens. For example: “I resigned my job on your word that I had a job with you. I’m now unemployed as a result, unable to get my old job back, and facing potentially months without income while I look for a new position. What can you do to make this right?” An employer with even a bit of decency should be willing to pay him severance or some other kind of settlement (which still won’t make him whole but is better than nothing). If that doesn’t work, he should have a lawyer contact them to try to negotiate on his behalf.

3. Required to attend a formal dinner on a work trip

When I accepted my current position, on the day I was hired I was told I would travel no more than three weeks out of the year for work. So far this year, I have been gone 7 with 3 more trips scheduled.

One of the trips is an annual trip that is a week long to the home office. The company pays for airfare and hotel and provides some meals and reimburses for others. We are in meetings all day and on the last night is a big formal dinner. We are only paid for the times that we are in the meetings and not for the formal dinner. That being said, can they force me to stay an entire extra day and make me attend the formal dinner if they are not paying me to do so?

Yes, if you’re exempt. If you’re non-exempt, they can still make you attend, but they need to pay you for the time.

Your bigger issue, though, is that you’re doing four times the amount of travel you signed up for, and if you’re unhappy about that, it could be worth talking to your boss about it.

4. Will updating LinkedIn with my new job hurt my chances with the other employer I want to work for?

I am presently working with company A but will leave them by the end of this month to another company, B.

I’m also in discussion with another company, C, and I have high hope of getting an offer from them. I’m likely to experience higher career growth both locally and internationally in company C than B.

My worry is that the HR rep of company C is very active on LinkedIn, and I don’t know if updating my LinkedIn profile after starting with company B will have any negative effect on my chance of getting offer from company C, knowing full well that LinkedIn will notify the HR rep of company C of such change on my profile.

So you’ve accepted a job with company B but are hoping to back out and work for company C instead? Yeah, that’s not going to reflect well on you, and company C is indeed likely to have a problem with it. Most employers want to hire people who keep their word and who don’t make commitments they don’t plan to keep. (After all, how would you feel if you found out that company C was planning to offer you a job but rescind the offer if they found a better candidate? And no, it’s not exactly the same, but it’s not good behavior on either side.)

If I were at company C and discovered you’d just started a new job with B, I’d need a very good explanation of why you accepted a job while continuing to actively interview elsewhere.

5. I don’t want to share a spreadsheet that I created on my own initiative

I have a situation that I’m not comfortable with. I have been at my job for over one year now, processing requests for an escrow company. When I started, there wasn’t anything in place to enable me to perform my job. I documented every request and made notes and compiled the information into a spreadsheet at home on my own time. The spreadsheet now contains over 2,000 entries and is a valuable tool to me, and I continue to update it on a daily basis.

I have been asked by my boss to put this document on the shared drive to help others when needed. I am the only one doing this particular task, and in the past when others were in this position, no one took the initiative to create anything, nor was it required as part of my job description. Since I created this document on my own time, I do not feel that I have to share this information, as I did it of my own volition to perform at my own job. Can I request compensation for this before I consider relinquishing this? Or what is the best way to handle this?

No. It doesn’t matter that you did it on your own initiative; it’s still work that your performed as part of your job, and your employer reasonably considers it such. (Although if you’re non-exempt, they need to pay you for the time you spent creating it. If you’re exempt, they do not.) If you resist sharing it when requested, it’s going to look really, really bad; there’s basically no way you can pull that off without torpedoing your reputation.

Yes, you put extra work into something and it was your idea. That’s the kind of thing that makes you a good employee, and you can bring it up at evaluation and raise time. But refuse to share it, and it’ll go from an advantage to a strong disadvantage.

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…

1. Do interviewers really decide whether to hire you within the first 90 seconds of meeting you?

My friend and I got into a friendly disagreement, and I hope you can speak to this issue. Friend thinks that a hiring manager will decide whether to hire you or not within the first 90 seconds of meeting you. I think that is complete nonsense and if a hiring manager makes decisions like that, I do not want to work for them.

Sure, in 90 seconds you can decide whether you find a person pleasant and approachable (not to mention notice sex, race, age, and their hair), but I would be mortified to find out those were the most important things. After 6 months of remote job search, that’s not at all what my experience has proven to me. I’ve had many interviews with in-depth questions and skills testings. I certainly hope all that played a role in the hiring manager’s decision to extend an offer.

Your friend is wrong. I’m sure there’s a small handful of hiring managers out there who operate like that, but they’re in a tiny minority. Most interviewers are, you know, interviewing and making their decisions based on the entirety of your interview, background, experience, and references.

It sounds like your friend has a sort of fatalism about interviewing, which some people find comforting (since it allows them to think that it’s basically out of their hands), but it’s really not how it works.

2. Should we return the leftovers from a food gift?

We had a patient bring lunch to our dental office staff. Should the leftovers be returned to the patient or kept by the office? I think it would be rude to return the leftovers. What do you think?

Keep them. They were given to you as a kindness, not on the condition or with the expectation that you’d return anything remaining. And yes, you risk making the patient feel bad, especially if there’s a lot left.

Thank her, eat what you want, and put the rest in the kitchen for anyone who wants more later (or let someone take them home if there’s no office kitchen).

3. My boss lowered my pay after I gave notice

Can my boss change my title and lower my pay because I’m giving three weeks notice?

Your employer can’t change your pay retroactively, but can change it going forward. That means that they can say “from tomorrow onward, your new pay is X,” but they can’t say, “We’re going to lower your pay for last week.”

You can in turn decline to work at the new rate, so you could say to your boss, “I’m not able to work for that rate or that title. Given that, should today be my last day or would you like me to work out the notice period at my normal rate and with no change in title?”

Also, your boss is an ass.

4. My boss told me to take the week off and come in at the end for a meeting

Is my boss legally allowed to tell me to take the week off and come in at the end of the week for a meeting? No mention of why he is telling me to not come in or if I’ll be paid or not. I have made no request for vacation time either.

Yes. However, if you’re exempt, you need to be paid for that time. (Exempt employees must be paid their full salary for weeks in which they do any work, and that meeting at the end of the week counts as work.) If you’re non-exempt, you don’t.

I’m not sure what the context is here, but this is the kind of thing that sometimes happens when someone has committed some sort of serious offense where firing is a possible consequence, and the employer is trying to decide how to deal with it.

5. Required to turn over raffle prize

If an employee won a raffle at a trade show on a business trip, can a company legally force that employee to give the prize they won to the company?

I can’t think of any law that would violate, although it’s an awfully short-sighted, stingy policy that’s going to alienate employees. That’s not really the way to build morale or encourage employees to go above and beyond the bare minimum.